so i have been struggling with hocd for quite some time now and a little bit of pocd when i was younger. i got help and medication and things have been somewhat better however when i sometimes go through tik tok i still cant seem to not look at the ones that are like “how i knew i was gay” and such things like that and my brain will find all the ways i can relate or what really gets me in such a spiral is all the comphet stuff (if ur struggling with hocd, dont read that it did nothing for me but harm) i dont know how to avoid these things and i dont wanna avoid, i wanna learn to accept and let these things come and go but its so hard to not let them stay and engage with them because they feel like “signs” to me, and i HAVE to read them or im avoiding it or repressing something by not reading it. and while all this happens inside my head it makes me distance myself away from dating and doing anything of that sort because i just cant imagine it going well and it scares me that it’s always gonna be like that.