- Date posted
- 3y ago
- Date posted
- 3y ago
I know itās common with SOOCD to lose attraction to your preferred gender. Iām a straight female, and have been my whole life, and Iāve always been absolutely boy crazy and now all the sudden it feels like all my attraction has just gone down the drain?? I still feel something for men, I feel drawn to men, I want to pursue a life with a man. But these thoughts have twisted that and made me scared that it is all a lie. I get anxious around men/women couples because I get soooo scared that I donāt want that. I get scared around gay couples because Iām scared that I will turn into that. Triggers are everywhere. Itās super difficult and hard but youāve got this. You will get that woman one day. You can recover from this scary disorder and so can I. I have a lovely boyfriend, and one day I will marry him. This is so hard, I know. Sometimes it feels all to real, sometimes it feels like ocd is just an excuse. Sometimes I get urges. I understand. You are not alone.
- Date posted
- 3y ago
It's constantly on my mind. I feel like I want to burst out crying. Went on a date last night. And I liked her. Not just look wise. But she was a nice person. But I don't know if I can see her again because of these feelings. Like I'm gay and want to be with a man. I have men in mind it's horrible š
- Date posted
- 3y ago
@Ihateocd83 I understand, these feelings feel like Iām bi/lesbian/asexual but like itās completely against what I want, and believe me, sometimes it feels like thatās just a lie. You should go on that date with that girl. You deserve it, tell OCD to just kiss your ass
- Date posted
- 3y ago
I can relate to both of these so much. These thoughts are making me question everything about who I am and who I want to be. I donāt want to be gay and I want to continue my life as a straight woman, but it feels as though I will never have that again. I am so terrified that I am just hiding behind OCD to avoid having to accept that these thoughts in my head are true, but they are making me feel sick to my stomach. I feel like I second guess myself every time I see straight couples now because I feel like I donāt want that, even though thatās all Iāve ever wanted. I donāt want to be with women romantically at all, the thought scares the shit out of me, but it feels so real and like everything in my life has just led to this point. I donāt know what to do.
- Date posted
- 3y ago
Exactly how I feel!
- Date posted
- 3y ago
@lindsš How are you doing today? I know you said you were having a hard time lately, and I am currently in the same boat. Feels like my world is ending and I am so scared that that means I am changing into something I donāt want to be.
- Date posted
- 3y ago
@cf05 Iām doing meh, not so good honestly real event is kicking my ass. Iām at work, and I get bad anxiety on days I have to work. I feel like my world is ending. I donāt want to end up with a girl and it feels like itās going to happen. Just sneaky ocd. How are you?
- Date posted
- 3y ago
@lindsš I feel as tho it's either come out or take my life. I wouldn't even mind being bi I keep saying that but a little voice says it's more than that. And I feel like I want to be with a man. I think back how I used to love women check them out. I feel anxious at everything. Looking at women because it feels like I'm doing it unnaturally š
- Date posted
- 3y ago
@Ihateocd83 My issue is that Iām scared Iām bi or lesbian. I donāt want to be either, I donāt want to end up with a woman. Like at all. Itās really difficult because ocd convinces me that itās all just a lie. And as a woman, Iāve always looked up to other women, wanting to look like them or be like them. But itās never been I wanted to be with them. And this whole soocd thing is just really difficult because it feels like my whole self is changing. And everytbing I do feels like a lie. Everything makes me anxious too, I canāt even wear certain things or say certain words. I have constant intrusive thoughts about being with a woman and I wish they would just stop! Iām so tired. Iām sorry youāre going through the same thing.
- Date posted
- 3y ago
@lindsš Yeah it's the same with me š
- Date posted
- 3y ago
I just feel like I most be bi
- Date posted
- 3y ago
I know the feeling, itās such a hard thing to deal with. Youāre so strong!
- Date posted
- 3y ago
I've started seeing some girl and I don't know how to explain to her about this. Or do I just say I'm bi š
- Date posted
- 3y ago
Whatever feels comfortable to you! You donāt have to share anything, either.
- Date posted
- 3y ago
@lindsš I feel its like the right thing to do. I don't think it's fair
Related posts
- Date posted
- 22w ago
Ok so Iām a 17 year old female, and Iāve always thought I was straight. But I just really want to know how you would know the difference between so-ocd and actually questioning your sexuality. I have nothing against the LGBTQ community (in fact I am very much a token straight friend, lol) but I saw a video about comp-het recently and it sort of felt like what I was experiencing. I donāt want to be gay, I want to be with men, I want to like men, Iāve always liked men, but now Iām questioning whether or not thatās real? Because people can be gay but not want to be right? Iām single and I always have been. I think women are gorgeous, but when I try to imagine actually having any sort of romantic or sexual relationship with a woman it feels wrong, at least most of the time it does? Sometimes Iām less sure, and Iāve never been particularly boy crazy. Iāve liked maybe 2 or 3 people in my life, (not to say Iāve never found other guys attractive, but it doesnāt seem to be as often as most people) I have no particular reason to be afraid of being gay, very supportive family, safe area ect, but I donāt want to be, does that mean this is ocd, I donāt know whatās going on every time I say Iām straight I feel like Iām lying, but that might just be because I think about it so much. The idea of being with a woman doesnāt feel like something I would want, but is that just because I donāt want to want it? People online say things with so much sureness, if you feel like this it means this. Ect.
- Date posted
- 20w ago
Lately, I have been able to manage my OCD thoughts kind of. Theyāre still there but I kind of push them away? I know that pushing them away doesnāt help but itās been my only way to survive. I get scared often about things like clothes or my voice or how I present myself. I get scared that I want to dress differently or act differently and it scares me. I know for a fact I donāt want boobs or anything like that, but my mind constantly is like āWhat if?ā and it kills me. It has ruined everything for me. Sometimes I canāt even look in the mirror because I get scared that I wonāt like what I see. Iāve also been afraid because I find myself relating to many female characters, or I want to act like them. Like Pearl from Steven Universe. I want to be graceful and elegant like her, but I donāt want to be a girl you know? My mind constantly pushes these thoughts of what if and images. Because I am not like most guys. Which I know is okay. It just freaks me out. It makes me question every aspect of my being. I know who I am, but I know that the only way to move forward is to accept that maybe I donāt.. Itās just a lot.
- Date posted
- 18w ago
I've gotten diagnosed with OCD and I'm in therapy. But I'm worried that I don't have OCD/that I got misdiagnosed. And recently I'm worried that I've just gotten myself into a habit of thinking of dirty minded or just plain old terrible things after I see/hear certain things because I feel like I need to prove I have OCD or else I'm faking(sometimes this goes away). Or that I'm just mimicking symptoms of ocd to cope with real problems I may have and that im just really deep into denial. I don't know...I'm just so tired. I mean, what if I really am what I think I am and this is my brains only way of coping? I don't even really feel anything towards most of the thoughts anymore either I just know they go against my values and I don't want them. I don't know if that's because I'm so mentally exhausted, I just don't care, or that the thoughts are true and I'm comfortable with them.
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