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- 3y
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- 3y
YesšššWorst feeling in the world Iāve been thereā¦especially when youāve liked guys before but you donāt want to date one ājust in caseā⦠Iām so sorry
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- 3y
OMG YES :( itās torture. Also talking to this guy rn and I really like him but then I start to think about EVERYTHING He does to see if I get āgrossed outā or the āickā now too
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- 3y
@cc97 YES I FEEL LIKE I HAVE TO TEST THAT EVERYTHING THEY DOES DOESNT GIVE ME THE ICK. Ughššit sucks. I feel u. Iām hereā¤ļø
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- 3y
@cc97 I literally feel this so much. I get the ick so easily any since having this ocd flare up, I feel like all the times I got the ick are just proof of me really always having been gay, even though I have been in love with both of my past boyfriends!! Itās making it feel so much more real and like I will cringe at any guy wanting to date me now, even though I still want a boyfriend. Itās so contradictory and confusing
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- 3y
@cf05 OMG LITERALLY YES!!
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@cc97 Iām so glad we are in the same boat. I feel like my attraction to guys isnāt even genuine anymore, even though I never want to be gay and the thought of never being with a man again makes me feel horrible. Hopefully we can get better soon and start feeling more attracted to men again. Iām not sure about you, but I think that part of the reason I may have lost the attraction in the first place is because I spent so much time over analyzing how I felt around both men and women and mentally checking myself and my past experiences.
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@cf05 Yes I agree 100%. Itās terruble.
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@cc97 Is anything youāre doing working to relieve the struggle? I feel like Iām drowning.
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- 3y
@cf05 Honestly not googling and reading forums 24/7 has helped a lot!! I realized I had ALOT of anxiety when u was constantly reading other forums because my brain went crazy ādo you relate to thisā āwhat if you donāt have ocd bc u donāt do that or think thisā etc. also trying really hard to stop ruminating but that is a huge struggle for me I havenāt mastered yet:( I also just started taking medication which seems to be helping a bit!
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- 3y
@cc97 Thanks for the tips!! I feel like the less I google though, the more I ruminateš© I have rethought my interactions with literally every single girl I have ever come in contact with and it honestly just feels like I am gay and Iām just now putting all the pieces together. I donāt want to be gay at all though.
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@cf05 I understand I feel that way too:(
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@cf05 And I agree the less I read the more I ruminate so I tried to keep myself busy (really through working) which helps a bit
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- 3y
@cc97 Do you ever feel like you canāt focus?? I literally have not had a single second of relief from these thoughts and it is ruining my life and has completely destroyed my ability to function. Iāve always been a hard worker and great student, and now I cannot will myself to get a job out of a fear of being triggered and finding out some ātruthā about myself, and I fear that I will not be able to pass my classes this semester because I am just three days in and already have been unable to concentrate because of my mind chatter and constant intrusive thoughts.
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- 3y
@cf05 Yes! I go through waves of that!!
Related posts
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- 20w
Has anyone felt like they never would find their person. Like you really couldnāt see it happening for you and then you found that person ?? What was it like?? Because Iām losing hope here. I really feel like there is no one for me
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- 13w
So I havenāt been on this app in a while. But I just want advice on how to overcome this. Iām now 18 and Iāve been trying out dating apps. Iām not gonna lie Iām kinda picky when it comes to dating only because I plan on dating to marryā¦so I take it a bit more seriously. But for some reason itās so hard to click with people on these dating apps. So my friend was helping me through this dating apps process. I told her that I wasnāt interested in this guy I was texting anymore because of the way he was responding to my messages. And she says maybe youāre gayā¦this is honestly the sixth time (Iām definitely over exaggeration but this isnāt the first time someone had said this to me) someone has ask/said this. Every time someone says this it literally sends me down this spiral of are they seeing something Iām not seeing. Despite never having a crush on a girl my mind goes down this loop of overthinking. And when I say I donāt want that lifestyle or I donāt really find pleasure in being apart of the lgbtq community my mind is like in denial. I just wanted to have a fun teenage dating experience and now every time I open the app I always think what if I really am gay and Iām just in denialā¦or what if the reason why Iām not connecting with anyone is because Iām really into girls. Since iām also religious, my mom wants to go what youāre denying who we are because of your religion. And I tried to reassure myself by saying I would know if that was the case like I would feel deep down who Iām truly attracted to and know that Iām trying to cover it up by dating men. This whole thing is so mentally taxing because I was going through this all throughout my senior year of high school and Iām not going into my freshman year of college so. Like I literally felt so much anxiety next to one of my classmates who was gay and a masculine presenting. I feel like if I wouldāve told this to anyone, theyād say of course youāre in denial. But ig reply if you can relate
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- 10w
Ok soā¦. I have never had a kiss Iāve never had a bf. I am also still a teen. I feel so inexperienced and I was talking to someone today about how I was going on a date this weekend with a boy a really donāt like, but I am going in case I feel something. Anyways the person was like shocked I never had my first kiss or much of experience at all and like she tells me Iām pretty. But boys donāt really approach me and all the guys I have ever ālikedā or was attracted to tend to be completely out of my league or I lose interest immediately. I just am feeling kind of numb because the person asked if I was self sabotagingā¦. Like looks arent the most important thing to me but you need to have a good personality to go with it and I guess Iāve never had an in person convo with a man that made me feel anything. I am also very obvious if I donāt like something it will show on my face and my actions. I just need advice because right now I feel lonely and am tired of bothering people with my issues. Should I put myself out there? But Iām honestly horrible at criticism if it is not constructive or even sometimes criticism period, also am scared of rejection. Also like what the heck do you talk about to these men like I swear I try to make convo or like talk to some people and its the blandest convo. I want to step outside my comfort zone and maybe download a dating app or somethingā¦. But I just dont feel pretty and I think my personality is not great. And whenever I bring that up I never want any damn sympathy I just want to say how I feel. I am just having a lot of anxiety about this and just relationships in general. Please any advice would do.
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