Also my soocd thoughts have been second nature lately, it feels like I enjoy it when my female friends give me affection and I catch myself checking them out and then having to stare again to see if I’m attracted, I get intrusive thoughts about girls being cute and that I’d want to date girls that I admire and that they’d be good girls to date. I’ve had zero sexual attraction to my boyfriend and all I can see are his physical flaws. It feels like I’d be 100% okay with touching a girl or dating one. My boyfriend just thinks I’m confused and he’s being supportive but it sucks because i feel like it makes it more real but I feel like it’s already so real. Its not me, but my reality has been morphed for too long. I feel okay with all this but I so badly want my old self back. This sucks

Thank you ❤️I hate having these feelings and thoughts

@PinkLotus Same same same!

I’m sorry to bug you. And I’m trying to be selfish But I need help with this really bad. I saw a short clip from family guy and I’m scared I do I don’t want to. I don’t like the way I’m smiling. It was a giant like auditorium with strippers or Pull dancers and I’m scared I’m still I’m scared he smiles and I acted Egerton I don’t know if I felt excitement and now I’m thinking of boots and I don’t want to I don’t wanna smile and be by your day. I’ve seen pole dancing and I’m scared I keep thinking of the woman’s body and going I will like that but it doesn’t feel right and whenever I say excitement it burns my chest and I feel guilty and embarrassed because I don’t wanna be bisexual and said I can’t help it but I identify us straight. I said I’m not gay said not completely not gay at all. Why did I act like that? I feel like I should add that I haven’t taken a Flexeril which is a muscle relaxer in two or three days and I have been taking it almost every day for a month. And now I don’t know if I’m just making excuses. But I felt anxiety I don’t know why I acted so eager and excited and I imagine some shrink asking me how did you feel seeing those girls and I said say I said sexy but it’s not sexy or exciting. I don’t want to now I’m thinking of the roundness of boobs and I don’t want this. I make cringing faces like I don’t and I said I do I don’t like boobs I like balls and pectorals but I don’t like boobs I don’t like both and I’m scared of the way I’m smiling like I really I don’t wanna be in keep I can’t stop I’m not bisexual at all. And I feel really bad because my cousin is going through cancer so he has real shit to deal with and I have this in my head. why am I smiling and said so what if I don’t wanna change I don’t wanna be it’s not hot why did I act why did I react like that I’m scared I’m thinking of the round and the heaviness I’m scared I don’t like the limp way boobs Thang and have to be supported I don’t like the round sides! Please help me why did I do that and I keep saying when it’s not hot I’m scared of how I smile I don’t wanna start identifying as a guy I’m straight I’m not by and I’m remembering the pole dance I want saw and I’m smiling and I was smiling at the woman but I didn’t like it and I don’t know if I was smiling simply because I was like I don’t like this you don’t do it for me because one of the lines in the song is why why don’t I do it for you it’s like cause you’re not a guy and I’m not gay. But why did I react like that to the family guy thing I’m scared I imagine walking in there smiling and being in all and like I do I’m scared I feel weird sensation to my mouth like I don’t like boobs though I don’t wanna be here anymore. It’s not hot why did I react like that and said all you can’t control your reactions but what does it say about me. I don’t wanna imagine going to a strip club walking around in awed amazement I don’t wanna be bi! I’m not! What scares me is usually when I see these Things it’s anxiety and then something else but it’s never I’m never turned on but why did I smile an act eater why did the anxiety come afterward. I’m scared I’m smiling in my chest feels clear and I keep thinking of I don’t I’m scared I don’t want them to be there not hot or luscious I don’t like the way boobs stick out I don’t wanna understand where guys are coming from

@Bookworm91 And I keep shaking my head like I can’t go back to them and I keep smiling over the round us and I can’t stop saying but it’s not hot I said I don’t I don’t wanna go back to being straight I’m not bisexual I’m scared I keep shaking my head the negative like I can’t go back to sick calling it and I’m scared I’m smiling I’m scaredy I don’t wanna live that life I’m not bisexual It’s not hot it is disgusting and I’m scared I can’t stop thinking of big rumbles poking out of the chest and just sticking out there it’s not hot I’m scared I can’t stop smiling like a maniac and shaking my head like I can’t go back to me and I can’t stop thinking of a heaviness I don’t want to start understanding how goes for you I can’t stop I shake my head the negative side kick back but it is disgusting it’s not hot I feel like I’m going crazy

@Bookworm91 Omg you guys I’m so sorry but I need help so so bad please someone help me. I can’t stop smiling thinking of them and I don’t embrace it I’m not bisexual but why does my heart feel so warm and why am I smile!? I don’t want to feel happy and I don’t really but I’m smiling weird called them and I want to go with it boobs aren’t hot A sexy keep smiling saying big and round I don’t want that I’m scared I can’t stop a man woman palming their boobs and jiggling them and I make faces like pecs are old news i’m scared I said that I’m scared to unlock something I don’t want to and I act like it is but pecs Are not boring I wanna go back to being myself! I’m Heterosexual! I can’t stop imagining women jiggling the boobs with their hands I don’t want the big round ones and I keep trying to say that’s more like it but I can’t get into it but why am I smiling thinking of that family guy thing why does my heart feel warm I don’t wanna change it I’m making a face and I’m scared I can’t stop with the hand thing the jiggling I’m scared I do I don’t want to I don’t like it Scared acting like oh yeah he’s old and I make faces he’s not only was I don’t want both why am I cringing always wanyed male parts Someone help Me i’m scared I can’t be over my guy and I’m not switching this can’t be the real me

@Bookworm91 You guys how do I go back!? My heart keeps burning what do I feel were saying they’re not in my magic I keep calling them and I’m scared that must be how I really feel boobs are gross they aren’t hot or sexy

@Bookworm91 Why does it feel suddenly wrong to say that my heart and body especially it doesn’t like tits and I’m scared i’m scared I can’t stop feeling tense like I don’t and I’m frightened of the way I’m smiling like everything switched around and changed I want why am I clenching my teeth like balls and pecs why do I keep tightening my jaw why am I smiling I don’t want to I don’t want tits

@Bookworm91 Oh my f-ing god I keep feeling worse When I say it doesn’t my heart says isn’t gay but why did is stand out my heart says boobs are not sexy and I keep settling on that word but boobs are not sexy. I just now said why does it have to change but my heart doesn’t but I keep cringing and I’m scared everything is switching around why do I see were saying it doesnt my heart doesn’t think boobs are sexy I don’t like how casually I said but I don’t want my heart to change my heart doesn’t want it may I almost hit by my heart what is happening to me I don’t want to change body wise I wanna see were saying that it’s not and I keep getting drawn to and I keep making faces but my heart wants boys and not them to have them! I’m scared I’m starting I feel tens I don’t wanna start thinking like that boobs are not like that they are not sexy I don’t wanna see them differently I don’t wanna look at the statue outside my work differently and I’m smiling and kinda like caulking my head at the side like reconsidering boobs aren’t sexy that’s not what my heart says they aren’t sexy why am I smiling over the way they point out why do I feel worse boobs aren’t sexy

@Bookworm91 I just said not willing to change for happiness like poop stupid they don’t make me happy and I saw Stupid commercial for some old cartoon that used to be popular when I was a kid and the girls like I’m becoming a woman and she was good kisser guy and said what a woman that doesn’t like women as I am but I’m not one of them I said only the boobs don’t make me happy. Only boys do in pectorals I can’t stop cringing like I don’t but I like boys and pectorals I don’t like boobs and I’m sorry I hope you guys don’t hate me