Why does part of my brain want me to just accept and be completely ok and fine to have negative thoughts about my partner and things about him? It feels like it wants permission to think shitty things and be completely good with it like nothings wrong. I don’t understand. It makes the anxiety go away but I feel worse bc it feels like I have no remorse for these thoughts etc? Any tips or advice??

Thank you for commenting! I really appreciate it. It’s like my brain is saying “ah yes now we can finally think about how our partner is annoying or ponder if we ever found him very funny or not.” And just all sorts of things like that and it’s making me upset😅 I don’t like thinking these things and feeling less anxious by allowing my brain to do this. I feel more anxiety trying to be positive about him and our relationship, but the brain just shoots it down and says “mmm gonna have to stop you right there, that’s a compulsion.”🙄🙄im so annoyed by all this

@crc_1394 Oh i can relate! 😣 This can be REALLY frustrating. Though i think no one have to be always positive about anyone or any kind of relationship. No one's perfect and we don't need to look for any excuses if we feel bad or unhappy about them (which is also completely fine). What we need is to find a reason WHY we feel that way and try to do something about it. I guess 😯 I mean, it's not your fault if you feel uncomfortable. It's perhaps not anyone's fault at all, but there always must be a reason. I once heard such a nice thing, that nowadays there is a huge "tyranny of positiveness" in all aspects of our lives and we mustn't submit to it. It's okay to feel not happy and question anything, the thing is to look for reasons and keep it healthy 😌 I'm not an expert, but it seems pretty valid to me xd Hope someday we'll forget about this anxiety like it was all just a nightmare 🙏

@Apostate Omg I’m glad I’m not alone! I think the thoughts stem from my obsessions about our differences and how my brain views differences as annoying or too much to handle. I think it tries to use his happy go lucky and silly demeanor as a threat to my more mellow and calm demeanor. Granted those two are very different but they can still exist happily. It’s like he’s a dog and I’m a cat😂and we do have different senses of humor, so what he seems as hilarious I sometimes find super annoying or just too goofy lol. But I don’t like to feel judgy or less comfortable with him when he’s in those moods bc he’s my man and I truly love him. He’s a commited and devoted person and so am I. It’s just that I have stupid ROCD. Maybe my brain wants a reason to be annoyed or upset at him or it’s always scanning for annoyed and upset feelings and then projecting them onto us? I also have a fearful avoidant attachment style, so a sarcastic woo hoo for me!

@crc_1394 Oh, i understand that truly! 😆 And i believe that everything will be just alright. You have each other no matter what and that's a huge power in this struggle. Human brain can be such a weirdo sometimes, but it also learns from our priceless experience and that's great i guess