- Date posted
- 3y
- Date posted
- 3y
Comment deleted by user
- Date posted
- 3y
I try to tell myself those things but the ocd is too strong and says things like “you don’t know what every single person with the virus has done to contract it maybe someone did get it in the way that you fear” or “if someone without ocd thought there was a chance there could be contaminated blood on it they would clean it too” or “people could have small cuts like paper cuts or dry cracked skin that bleeds without even noticing so not everyone with the virus might be 100% careful all the time.” I don’t go near the trash can in the garage but others in my household need to take the trash out and they know to keep things clean and wash up after they do for my sake but just the fact that the contaminated trash can is there and the whole process every time someone has to take the trash out is so overwhelming for me still.
- Date posted
- 3y
@J_ All my usual compulsions and fears throughout the day are just exacerbated, and it makes it harder to let things go that I might be able to on an easier day. For example I have huge problems with red specks in the house. On a good day I might’ve been able to dismiss it and say it’s probably just from food or something, or I haven’t left the house in months so it couldn’t be blood from a stranger, but lately dismissing something like that feels way too scary and impossible cause of the fears being exacerbated. On a good day I might be able to touch a food package and think it’s ok but lately since the fear has been worse I’ll think about someone with the virus potentially touching the item in the store before my mom brought it home and have to wash my hands.
Related posts
- Date posted
- 20w
This fear keeps coming back and it’s to the point I cry and what to panic. I no longer talk to the man simply because I wanted to move on and find something meaningful to have with someone (relationship wise). I still keep fearing I need to go get my blood checked. Thoughts like “what if I have it and don’t know it and give to someone?” “What if that urine test I took months ago didn’t work” I got tested for stds but it came back negative. They took a urine test but google says you have to have your blood drawn!! I’m so scared. My mind tells me “you have HIV” and then a sense of peace comes and scares me even more!!!
- Date posted
- 18w
sorry this is super long i just wanna know if anyone else has been thru something similar bc i feel super alone 🩷 i have super bad contamination ocd. it was bad already but my house was like my safe space until a few months ago someone brought something into my house that i considered ‘contaminated’. and so then i felt like that part of the house was contaminated, then it spread to everything outside my room (since family is moving around touching stuff) and then somehow i got convinced everything in my room except my bed is contaminated and i need to wash my hands after touching it. in my mind its like the contamination just infinitely spreads to things after the tiniest bit of touch. idek what im afraid of anymore or even what the original thing was but i can’t let it go. when i have to wash off contamination i have to wash at least 4 times or until it feels right, or sometimes take rlly long showers and wipe down all my stuff. i even throw away food and clothes or just whole items sometimes because they feel so contaminated i don’t want them in my space. i can’t be super near people or have anyone touch me, and i also can’t bring anything new into my room since it had to go through the entry of my house which feels contaminated. i feel like all i do is lay in bed and then wash my hands and do compulsions so i can go eat or do other stuff around the house. also i never go out because i’m bc people outside make me feel dirty, and i hate thinking about how many people have touched stuff in stores or in public and stuff. so im just in my room worrying all day. i feel so trapped and the contamination/avoiding it is all i think about anymore i barely have time for anything else and im never present when i talk to people because im worrying about if i accidentally got contaminated. im starting erp next week and knowing that im going to have to expose myself to things is really freaking me out. does anyone else have this kind of ocd ? im exhaustedddd 🥲🥲💔
- Date posted
- 14w
This is a long one lol but basically, a couple of weeks ago I went to the toilet (#2, sorry for the tmi). Let's just say it was messy. I remember that a speck of.. #2.. Fell off the piece of toilet paper. This was probably the worst thing that could ever happen. I can't remember clearly but I'm pretty sure my jeans were on the floor underneath near where the speck could have fallen. There was also a towel. I don't know exactly where it fell as it was so small, but I made sure both the towel and the jeans went in the laundry basket and I cleaned the floor near there. Fast forward to like the next day. My mum does most of the laundry, so she will have picked up all the towels and clothes from the laundry basket and taken them to the wash. The problem is the speck. I don't know where it went but if it was on the towel and she picked it up.... Thus, contaminated mum. And she also puts clothes away that are dry. I remember that day she put my hoodie in my wardrobe, and I haven't worn it since because I feel it is contaminated. I haven't worn the clothes that have touched the hoodie. This leaves me with not a lot of clothes. And today I finally snapped and picked up a sweatshirt that had maybe touched the hoodie. And now I'm just sat here spiralling, wearing it. What if it touched the speck? What if the speck touched my mum and then touched the hoodie which then touched the sweatshirt I'm wearing? Please I'm so scared.
Be a part of the largest OCD Community
Share your thoughts so the Community can respond