So I have contamination OCD. I work in a laboratory and use different chemicals. I ruminate alot if I did get chemicals on my clothes and spead to my loved ones. For example, I spilled some solution on my shoe. I did wipe it off my shoe and I did research and the solution does not look dangerous. But the what if is killing me from the inside. I am scared that, I did spread to my loved ones and doubt if the chemical is dangerous. I am even scared to touch the shoe, because it feels contaminated. If I touched it I start to wash my hands. And scared to wear it when I am close to them. It made very tired and the anxiety is killing me. I just wanted to vent and don't seek for reassurance. Also ERP looks so scary. Because the experience feels so real, I don't want to hurt my loved ones. But I think that's the only option.

cassxxx

124d ago

I totally understand you! There was a time when I bumped my leg in a bottle of an insect killer. I know it's closed but I'm starting to think it's in my skin so I washed it many times and I wore a jogging pants so that it won't get anywhere but I'm still afraid that I'll harm my family with the insect killer on my leg (It's really hard to explain). It was really exhausting.

Semih

124d ago

I think we are on the same page, I totally understand what you was going through.