- Date posted
- 3y
- Date posted
- 3y
I struggled heavily with this for 3-4 starting my junior year of college with my boyfriend. It is scary at first when you slowly become less anxious. I felt the same way being anxious that I wasn’t anxious or anxious enough and fearing that it was because I just didn’t care what would happen or what I could do. Try to look back and see the pattern of your thoughts and how when you get over one, another comes and you seem to almost forget past thoughts. It’s a nasty pattern and getting less anxious doesn’t mean you don’t love him and don’t care. I have since been able to move away from rocd and now those thoughts just come and go. You got this
- Date posted
- 3y
Thank you so much for your response ❤️ I'm so afraid, that I didn't have enough symptoms or rocd even when it started. I wasn't so much anxious even at the time beginning, so now I can't do ERP, because I feel no anxiety. I'm only crying and want to be believe, that I still cannot stay with him and be happy with him...
- Date posted
- 3y
@Andate You’re sad because you can’t stay with him and be happy?
- Date posted
- 3y
@Anonymous I'm afraid, that I can't stay, while staying with him and loving him is everything I want. I'm crying badly every time when I think about leaving..
- Date posted
- 3y
It would be good to push yourself to watch those movies and read those books. The more you give up to try and satisfy your ocd, the more your life is going to shrink and ocd will take more control. You have to understand that ocd tries to steal and destroy you. Try to battle it hard and trash the ruminating thoughts
- Date posted
- 3y
I think you're giving out bad advise here. People are here to share experiences, .
- Date posted
- 3y
Oh I see. You're not replying to me. My bad.
- Date posted
- 3y
I see. Is there a reason you’re afraid you can’t stay?
- Date posted
- 3y
Because I'm afraid that I don't love him and without anxiety, maybe it's my truth?
- Date posted
- 3y
If leaving him makes you feel very sad, I don’t think that you don’t love him. Although most people respond with anxiety, it looks like you’re responding with sadness. Try and trash the thoughts that come your way and rather than trying to figure out if whether you love him or not is your truth, focus on the present and things you may be excited to do with him
- Date posted
- 3y
Thank you ❤️ I was so happy with him before all that started. I was reality happy, he felt like home. When I thought I might lose him, I cried all the time, and hold his hand in sleep to remember him. I was crying many many times, I was obsessing a d googling for many hours, I lost some weight, I literally wanted to die, to not suffer anymore. I don't want to lose him, I don't want to have these thoughts. I'm scared, that if it's not rocd, that mean it's true, so that's why I want this anxiety so much..
- Date posted
- 3y
If you’re constantly thinking about it, stressing, and crying, I feel like it could be a type for anxiety response. Have you ever had anxiety before? It is not always a physiological feeling even for me. You got this and I’ve been there too!!
- Date posted
- 3y
And now we are still together 4.5 years later
- Date posted
- 3y
Happy for you! And wish you all the best beat in future! Before, I have really bad health anxiety, when I was frantically making appointment with doctors, and finally get hospitalized. I have also some compulsion with word "death". I'm obsessing about 10 months now, can't stop thinking and googling.
- Date posted
- 3y
@Andate Week ago I feel love and happiness, then started to obsess once more. I'm crying in every appointment with my therapist. She think I have ocd a d should see psychiatrist.
- Date posted
- 3y
One good exposure to start would be to refrain from googling as much as possible. Does wat more harm and no good. Do you have any other compulsions that have to do w rocd?
- Date posted
- 3y
I'm seeking reassurence from my partner and other poeple, comparing my relationship to others, checking feelings frequently, making scenarios to see my reactions, ruminating over and over againg also with analysing things from the past, trying to think the solution, comparing my symptoms with others a lot, checking my attraction, checking my pulse, to see if I'm anxious... I'm avoiding songs, books and movies about love, I'm avoiding attractive women in movies, because I'm questioning my sexual orientation. I spend days googling and can't to my job properly due to that, because I'm always in my head. Confessing to my partner...
- Date posted
- 3y
You'll be fine, it's just so frustrating, I can't stop ruminating either, digging up every little feeling I had when we were dating, doubting my love for him, and why, if I was so anxious, why did I stick it out. I've been married 38yrs and just recently, this all.popped up, and I cant calm down. I don't want him to know all this anxiety and anxiousness is about the past. I feel silly bringing it up.
- Date posted
- 3y
So you mean to let them keep playing in my mind and let the ocd manifest so it will work its way out.. I'm confuse, I thought it was best to do stop thought processing when it got bad.
- Date posted
- 3y
These movie are from real life , and aren't pleasant to watch,.. usually if there's a bad movie, I won't watch it. I turn it off and don't watch it . So I'm a little confused on what you mean.
- Date posted
- 3y
What I meant was if there are many things that you now shield yourself from doing, your world closes in on you. If material that is watched is objectively unhealthy then no don’t watch it. If there is a movie like the notebook that is wholesome and abojt love, make it an exposure to watch it and push through. And no I don’t think it is good to let thoughts ruminate. It’s good to try and trash them.
- Date posted
- 3y
What comment did you think was bad advice?
Related posts
- Date posted
- 22w
Right now I feel like I’ve realized something awful. Like maybe… I never truly loved my boyfriend. Maybe in the beginning I was just excited to be in a relationship. Maybe I confused that excitement with real love. And when the intrusive thoughts started, maybe it wasn’t ROCD — maybe it was the truth hitting me. I write this and it feels real. That’s the scariest part. It feels calm and clear and like maybe I’ve just been lying to myself all along, holding on because I “should,” not because I truly want to. I can’t remember how it felt to love him — and that makes it worse. I feel so disconnected, so numb, like nothing makes sense anymore. Every time I try to feel something for him, it feels like I’m faking it. Like I’m playing a role, not being myself. But the thing is… I’m not at peace. If this was really the truth, why does it hurt so much? Why does this “realization” come with panic, guilt, emptiness, and so much fear? I don’t want to hurt him. I don’t want to lose him. But I also don’t want to keep living like this — doubting myself, my feelings, and my past. I feel like I’m stuck in a cycle I can’t break, and I’m scared I’ll always feel this way. Has anyone ever felt like this before?
- Date posted
- 22w
I believe I have ROCD — at least, that’s what many people here have told me based on what I’ve shared — and I really need help, because I feel like I’m falling apart. I don’t know what I feel anymore. I don’t know what’s real. My thoughts come as loud, cold statements — not questions. They say things like: “Nothing is the same.” “You don’t love him.” “You’re just staying because you’re used to him.” And even though I know I’m supposed to let the thoughts pass and not engage with them — I can’t. I get stuck in them. I try to find answers, I ruminate, I check, I cry, I panic. Everyone says “love isn’t just a feeling” — and I know that. But… I still want to feel something. I want to feel warmth, or connection, or even just peace. It’s been so long since I felt anything like that. Now everything just feels empty or terrifying or cold. My brain only gives me negative interpretations. No memory brings me comfort anymore. Nothing feels like it used to. And the worst part is — it all feels true. Sometimes I think: “What if I’m just denying the truth?” “What if I’ve finally realized that I don’t love him, and I just don’t want to admit it?” This feels like the worst version of myself. I’m so confused and scared and tired. Even therapy didn’t help — my therapist said things that made it worse, and now I don’t know who or what to believe anymore. I just want help. I want to know how to face ROCD — if that’s what this really is. I want to believe I can feel love again. I don’t want to lose myself in this forever. Has anyone else felt like this? How did you start to get better? i cant even remember past good memories with him, my head tells me that i didnt love him and i was just “excited “ to have someone. We have 2 years together and i have been dealing with this for a year and a half.
- Date posted
- 19w
for a few days now I’ve been super anxious about my relationship. I’ve been anxious about it before but lately it’s been worse than normal. I’m in a very healthy and loving relationship, I love my boyfriend so much and he treats me so so well. The only thing is that I’ve been having scary thoughts that what if I’m lying to him and don’t actually love him? What if I don’t find him attractive? And like what if the only way to stop being anxious is to break up with him? I don’t want to leave him and I am so scared. I feel like I’m lying to him by not telling him what’s going on because he might think I’m actually going to leave him, which I’m really not going to. I have had anxiety since before we started dating and incestual and sexual ocd, then I got into a point where I started having religious ocd, and now I have ROCD on top of that I think. I’ve never been diagnosed but I’m going to therapy and figuring things out but I’m so scared. Idk what to do and I feel like if I talk to anyone they’re going to say I have to leave him.
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