Hi everyone, I have recently found out that what I thought for years was anxiety or phobias is OCD. This came about only when I was unable to function. I am now working with a therapist and using ERP. This is all really new and would love to hear any stories of hope. Especially if anyone out there fixates on anything that could affect their health - because right now delaying my compulsions is basically fighting the feeling of dying 😔 Right now I feel entirely overwhelmed. I feel like my nervous system has been on edge for weeks. I do get small windows where it seems to relax a little but I am exhausted. I am a few days in trying to track not responding to my anxiety. But it isn’t like it always disappears after some time. I spent most of yesterday feeling so anxious. It can persist for hours and hours and sometimes it feels like days. Is this normal? Has anyone had similar experiences? I am trying to bring my overall anxiety down hoping this will help - decreasing caffeine and going to do some mindfulness today. This feels so futile right now 😞 guess I need to hear that’s normal

Thanks, my compulsions are mostly seeking information and reassurance that I am not at risk of things (usually things that are an almost non existent risk).

@Nick!777 I see. Well, it's already great that you have good insight, by recognizing that the risk is almost non existent :) ERP is about "rewiring" your brain, and since you mentioned you've always thought it was anxiety and phobias, I guess you've been in this hypervigilant/reassurance and Info seeking mode for a while, so your brain needs time to readapt. It's scary at first. It's terrifying even. And one questions it and whether or not one will be able to take it, but it DOES get better when you start gradually and find the balance between too much/not enough, and what's great is that you have a therapist, and they'll help with this part, and start with the less scary things. I've done with two therapists, one went too fast, and traumatized me, the other was very slow, starting with imaginary scenarios, I thought it was too slow, but those sessions helped me in the long term and when I think that it helped me hug my loved ones again, and it now seems almost normal again, I'm so so happy. ERP works, you've got this, delay, resist, resist, resist. The anxiety will slowly go away faster and faster, and your brain will have new habits. And keep in mind that it's not linear, sometimes symptoms are more intense, and it gets harder to deal with, don't get discouraged by "small relapses", as long as they get further apart, and you keep evolving. It's worth it 🙏

@Anonymous* Some how even though logically it feels like low risks I still feel like I am dying, I guess repetition is the only way.

@Nick!777 I understand completely, been there, still am for a couple of things. This is the definition of good insight, you KNOW it's excessive and not based in reality, but the brain goes to the 0.0000001% chance it's actually the case. Just resist or at least delay as much as you can

Happy to hear it helps a little! I understand completely, you've been thinking this way for a very long time, it's a habit, almost a reflex, and you're actively trying to stop yourself, it's not easy and there will be resistence. But you've got this !!! At the beginning, it's very hard and distressing, this is very normal, but it will get better with time

Hopefully it doesn't count as reassurance, I'm seeing it more as motivation. You've got this!!

@Anonymous* Yes, I feel like reassurance would relate to my perceived fears - where as this is encouragement not to engage with them.