- Username
- kittea
- Date posted
- 2y ago
That’s so hard :( It sounds like a lot of the pain you’re going through right now has nothing to do with OCD, because a breakup like that is super intense for everybody. Questioning back and forth like crazy is probably your OCD. So it sounds like you need to try to let go of those doubts in the ERP way of resisting trying to “figure it out,” and instead just accept the pain you’re feeling and let yourself feel that pain instead of trying to solve it.
As in, the fact you’re in pain right now doesn’t necessarily mean you made the wrong choice. The pain makes sense. You can’t solve away the pain or use thinking to make it go away.
Thank you so much. It’s been a few days and we even got to chat through it a few days later and we know we’re making the right decision, as tough as it is. Now I’m dealing with my OCD just making me overthink every little thing around me in many ways a little bit more bc that’s how I am and I’m in a bit of an emotional place 😂
@kittea I know it’s still super hard but it sounds like you’re doing a good job :) I know what you mean, sometimes it’s just trying to do your own thing while OCD is like an annoying person next to you heckling you who you have to ignore
Additional context: we both really want to remain friends. We are seeing how these next few days go in terms of the breakup but we just aren’t in the same place right now and I’m just…scared I guess? We are in the same friend group too and we don’t want the other to have to suffer or leave at our expense. It’s only been one day and I know time will heal but my GOD I have no tools to deal with this haha
im going through something similar. break up of almost 4 years. do you have any social media? maybe we can talk there for support.
I’m so so sorry to hear that. :( Are you doing okay? We can definitely chat here if you want
My boyfriend of almost two years just broke up with me. I’m hurting a lot and the ocd has skyrocketed because of it, especially since I haven’t been feeling the best already. I also always have a physical reaction to stress, and have been dealing with feeling sick all night. Does anyone have any tips or advice for how to deal with this?
My boyfriend just dumped me because he lost feelings and thinks we’re too hard and it’s because of my anxiety and ROCD:(( I’m a mess rn guys. I love him and I lost the best part of me. Does anyone have any advice for breakups
About a month and a half ago I broke up with my girlfriend of almost 3 years. I had relentless doubts/anxiety about whether or not it was the “right” relationship for me. I would always analyze my relationship with Google searches and ask family/friends their opinion of my relationship. The expression of all these doubts that I had, made it seem clear to others that I just hadn’t found “the one” or that it just wasn’t the “right relationship” yet. Over time I began to agree with these opinions. Assuming that if I was in the “right” relationship, I wouldn’t have these relentless doubts. I had repetitive thoughts that I needed to end the relationship or commit to marriage with her right now. These thoughts caused me a lot of anxiety and often times I was lost in my head instead of being in the present. It felt as if I was just swimming in constant anxiety/doubt month after month. I got to a point where I felt depressed and even irritable when it came to her/the relationship. One day I decided that it must just not be the “right relationship/person” if I’m having all of these doubts and that she deserved someone who could give her more reassurance about the future. I felt that I wasn’t being the boyfriend that I thought she deserved. So I broke up with her. I was relieved for a few weeks. I felt I had a clear mind now that I wasn’t thinking so much about it anymore. It seemed like I had made a good, but difficult, decision. Recently, that anxiety has come right back to me. And then I learned about ROCD. I’ve now been stuck in a constant loop of ruminating about whether ROCD is the reason I broke up with her. From what I’ve read and learned about, it seems that I need to become okay with being uncertain about the situation. I’m still new to this, so I’m looking forward to learning more from my therapy sessions. I don’t really know what I’m hoping to get out of posting this. It’s just difficult feeling like I can’t trust my own thoughts/feelings. The possibility that I broke up with her bc of ROCD makes me feel sick. But I don’t feel that I could attempt to get back with her unless I felt a little more certain about the relationship. I don’t want to be focused on finding clarity or certainty. However, I’m very new to all of this. I feel overwhelmed, defeated, confused, and paralyzed about everything.
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