Hi, I was in NOCD about august 2020 after having a complete episode. I had judt starting babysitting and I honestly had nothing going on bc of the pandemic so it was the only thing I had to do. I started tele therapy about teauma drom my father and my big fear of turning into a narcissist like him (should have been a clue Lol) I get groinL responses for alot of things and one of the kids triggered it bytouching me And one night after playing with my bf virtually on minecraft, it was 2 am I couldnt stop thinking about ir, thus the intrusice thoughts came in. Started vommitting, stomach flopped crying and panicking in my room. I went straight for the internet ans BOOM, POCD popped. Next day my mom had gone to work and I called her to come home bc I was having a meltdown. I started tellingnher everything, told my bf about it, had a meltdown again, called my therapist. She wasnt familiar wirh ocd and tried reassuring me. I started telling everyone, i started being TMI of things that sexually interested me in order to see if thar what led me into being a pedophile. I told my friend that I didn't want to be near them bc of this and told her ALL THE IMAGES i was picturing. I got on meds, but I wasnt feeling better (it was only 2 weeks) and freaked out again around my nieces cause I couldnt help but notice when they ran around in their underwear. That's when I found NOCD. Whoever was the service specialist that answered was not judgemental at ALL. They sent me links to different profiles of theraoist availble. I honestly wasnt sure how ERP was supposed to work. I kept asking for reassurance on reddit and here. My NOCD therapist was extremely compassionate. The kind of lady that seemed like she'd make you baked goods and give you a warm blanket. But as SOON as it was time to do ERP, oh she was straight up make me do insane excercises. Making me write scenarios of what I was doing to kids, read them out loud read them in my head IN FRONT of the kids. IN DETAIL. But all those excercises work. And what happened? BOOM relationship OCD. Started spiraling a bit, she caught me in the act of reassurance. Had to do it AGAIN. It took a YEAR but i got it through my head the tools I need to handle OCD and especially so with an episode. I keep the journal of all rhe pocd thoughts and scenarios visible in my room just to continuously trigger the anxiety slightly to keep me on my toes. Recently I had a zoophilic episode. But it only seriously lasted a week because I went STRAIGHT into ERP mode Im still uncomfy when the thought pop up but it didnt stop me from petting my cats. ERP is the biggest way to work with your OCD. But you have to first accept that you arent trying "get rid of OCD" but trying to have a relationship with it. I cant speak for non pure ocd, but ERP makes pulling your teeth out with a pair of pliers sound like a day at disneyland. But it works. You can have the tools. You can get through it.