I am 19 years old and Latino . I am also gay and live with strict conservative catholic parents. A while back when I came terms with ocd and had the realization, I decided to open up to my parents about my mental health. Let’s just say things didn’t turn out as expected , both unfortunately didn’t believe me . Also, theh believed it had to do with me being on my phone too much that I wanna believe anything I see . Neither of em wanted to listen to me . Mom said she’s sees me just fine . It was so deliberating and everything felt so collapsing because I felt anxious to tell them ebeytjjng about it , but they didn’t want to hear . So, ever since I haven’t mentioned it to them considering that . Over the past couple of months , they haven’t been so strict on me for things I didn’t want to join in on. She’s very pressuring srill about going to church and her religion. I do believe in God, but I do not interpret God way they do. I believe God loves me even if I’m gay. They will not ever accept me if I come out and I feel so alone because not only do I have to hide myself, but I have to live with this mental disorder they don’t believe of and/or know of and think I’m simply being lazy . I just want boundaries - they can treat me and view me as a child still🤷🏾‍♂️I want to become an independent adult . My goal rn is to get my drivers license and buy my car. But I literally know notning bout adult life . I am nervous, scared , worried...I do not want to rely on my parenrts all time and live with them . Everything is so hard rnn. Ocd is the one factor to all my problems .

Sooooooo omg my mom mentioned that she saw a show on televisopn where people with weird mental ilnesses spoke and she mentioned that there was someone with hocd and how she thought it was weird but she thought in this generation she doesnt blame people for having it because it isnt their own fault and there is alot of pressure on your sexuality and omg i got sooo red and i felt like i was gonna burst out in tears and tell them everyything i was sooo close to just break and tell them what ive been going trough for the past year. Im so freaked out and like... i jusr wanna tell them but im ashamed and i know i will n e v e r tell them but i cant believe i got this close. And i just dont know what to do bevause on the show the doctor said a looot of people approached him with having hocd and that its really a new big mental ilness thing. You know what it is, my mom said that the man on the show who had hocd said he wasnt in to guys at all but his brain told him he liked it and that was me in the ebginning of hocd but now i have a feeling i cant relate anymore and that hurts so much because its like hocd has gotten so deep into me that i honestly believe it and like i created genuine feelings towards woman. I dont know what to think anymroe. I pray everynight god will Release me and somehow i feel like this is my punishment for not listenig to Him and i also todsy read in the bible That people who ignore god do things wrong when it comes to sexual stuff and that people wont be able to think clear anymore and that they will be lost and thats just me and im So afraid because the bible says people will be punished for it idk im so freaked out!!!! I wanna be a better person so bad but i cant when my brain is like this i need help from god but im scared he just rejects me vecause ive been a horrrible person. So selfish and i know my heart is ebtter than that but i cant set good apart from bad bevause my brain wont let me. Its like i dont give a shit about anyhting anymore and i miss me who could think clear and who was genuine and honored god. Its like ny current brain cant do that snymore it doesnt have the right functions for it anymorw. Like the good part in me had been cut out and im tryna find it but its destroyed and theres no way it will come back.

Hello new friends! My name is Graham and I just got diagnosed with OCD in December. I’m 21 years old and a music student at a prestigious conservatory in New York City. This is my OCD story. I have had OCD like symptoms since a very young age, for example, at age 3 I thought I would die if I left the house without a bottle of water, and refused to do so for almost 7 years, and I had countless sensory issues with food and clothing. However, around age 12, the thoughts began to become increasingly horrible. Violent intrusive images, urges to yell obscenities at people, overall intense fear of hurting other people emotionally or physically occupied my brain for hours a day. Additionally, I began to have intense contamination fears - obsessive hand washing, (although not nearly as bad as many people’s) having to carry hand sanitizer everywhere I went, and even worse, as I began to grow body hair, that was as “unclean” as it could get to me. I *had* to rid my body of it. These thoughts then began to plague my performances as well - I would obsessively worry about a certain thing, and it would ruin the whole experience for me, no matter how well I pulled through. As I also was trying to come to terms with my sexuality, (I’m gay) my brain produced tons of sexual intrusive images of both men and women, leaving me lost and confused as to what I actually was. I did not dare search what my thoughts meant. I thought for sure doing so would lead me to be put on a FBI watch list, inform me I was clinically insane, or something along those lines. One day in late October, I was on my commute home from school. This commute is an hour each way on crowded public transportation - between contamination and harm OCD, you can imagine how this experience goes for me every day. For 30 minutes, my brain thought of everything horrible I could do to the person next to me. Strangle them, stab them, rape them, call them racial slurs, rip their hair out. It was so overwhelming that by the time they walked off the train I thought I was going to faint from the panic I felt. I decided enough was enough and googled what I was feeling, which lead me to discover this subset of pure O OCD, which I knew nothing about. A friend of mine was diagnosed when we were 15, and I assumed it just meant obsessive without compulsive, and didn’t look into it whatsoever. I began to see a counselor at my school, and he sent me to the psychiatrist through the school who diagnosed me with OCD. Almost immediately after my diagnosis, my grandfather fell ill. I couldn’t bear to tell my parents while we were dealing with that. He ended up passing away a little less than a month later. This has been so beyond hard on my entire family. It’s been a little over a month now, and as more things have gone wrong for my mom - her company being hacked, getting in a car wreck (she’s totally fine other than whiplash) - I haven’t been able to bring myself to discuss with them. I feel as though I will be the straw that breaks the camel’s back. But I know I need to tell them. Hopefully it will happen as soon as possible...but it’s plaguing my mind a lot. If anyone can offer words of advice on what to do, I would appreciate it greatly. Thanks for reading. That’s my story. I hope to meet more wonderful humans who understand what I go through - have a wonderful day all! :)

i'm sorry in advance for how long this post is and if it's to much information. i'm undiagnosed but have been struggling with compulsions and intrusive thoughts since i was 7 or 8. My worst intrusive thoughts theme has been about p*d*phil*s. I've been dealing with it since my freshman and sophomore year but these thoughts didn't become debilitating until June of last year. I had a panic attack and confessed to my parents about these intrusive thoughts. They were obviously shocked and share. I felt so ashamed and like a monster. After talking with my dad he said we would see a therapist about it. Sadly we never did the first appointment we were late and missed are spot and the second appointment i sprained my ankle the night before so instead i was in the hospital. After that i closed myself off i tried dealing with them on my own using sources like NOCD and stuff. I did try to bring up going to therapy to my parents. Every time they would ask me if the intrusive thoughts were back and I would lie saying "no i just would like to go to therapy" I was so scared they'd be afraid of me and stop loving me, especially my mom. Eventually after awhile my parents forgot about it and I tried ignoring these intrusive thoughts because I was so focused and stressed from school. I decided I could just wait till I turn 18 and schedule myself into therapy. recently though my intrusive thoughts have gotten worse. I recently had a convo with one of my friends who has intrusive thoughts as well and she's encouraging me to talk to my parents. I'm asking y'all what should I do. As much as I'm scared I want to get help because I'm sick of living and feeling like i'm day away from acting on my intrusive thoughts.