- Date posted
- 3y
- Date posted
- 3y
i seriously feel the same way about any boy i talk to or if they give me a hug or anything, and the feeling of guilt is extremely stressful because then you start to second guess youself and convince yourself you actually were flirting. you know deep down you didn’t do anything wrong just let yourself sit through the feeling of uncomfort and don’t try to stop thinking about it because it will only make it worse. let yourself feel uncomfortable to feel comfortable again. idk if that helps but
- Date posted
- 3y
Yeah I get you exactly. I knew in the moment I wasn’t flirting or anything. I’m just worried that what I was doing was inappropriate and I was too close to him
- Date posted
- 3y
I struggle with something very similar. Most interactions I have with the opposite sex I worry about coming of wrong. And it's easy to sit and let your mind spiral. It helps me to try and think about the fact that I was just friendly or talking. And it helps me to try and think of it from an outside perspective. I know it's not easy to do that. But for me that's what I try and do.
- Date posted
- 3y
I’m worried that from an outside perspective it would’ve looked bad. With my hands around his neck and his on my waist, that looks more than friendly even tho it was just friendly :(
- Date posted
- 3y
i know my therapist and my mom both told me not to tell him because it’s just feeding into my ocd pattern but i feel like even if i already told him once there’s some sort of information that i need to tell him to see if he gets mad and tells me i did something wrong
- Date posted
- 3y
I’m going through the exact same thing! It makes me feel better hearing that someone else is going through something similar. I keep confessing to him when I remember more details or a story
- Date posted
- 3y
He’s told me I’ve done nothing wrong. But then I think “did I leave something out of the story” then rethink it and tell him more
- Date posted
- 3y
you have to stop confessing to him because it only makes it worse this is the second time i’ve gone through something like this and the first time i went through it i had to be put on meds because i was freaking out so bad about it thinking i’m a terrible person
- Date posted
- 3y
@krusso not worse for your relationship but worse for your ocd because it makes you think that confessing will make you feel less guilty and it won’t
- Date posted
- 3y
I've been struggling with something very similar recently. I felt like a had done something to betray my partner but nothing actually happened. They have told me I've done nothing wrong. But I still feel that nagging feeling to confess bro them. I know for me if I'm able to not give into the urge it settles down. But if I give in. That's all I can think about. I've been trying alit lately with other impulsives I've had to just tell myself I don't need to do this. And over time some of it's really helped. I know I give into it other times but it still gets better.
- Date posted
- 3y
so if you don’t give in to the feeling or need to confess to your partner several times it eventually makes you feel less discomfort? because i told him how i was feeling and then again last night i told him how i’m having anxiety and ocd over the situation and it’s making me feel like i flirted with people but i know that i didn’t. and obviously he knows i didn’t too but then i woke up this morning with a nightmare that i cheated on him in my dream with a random man
- Date posted
- 3y
For me personally. If I'm able to fight the need or want to confess it to them I notice the urge goes away a bit. The more I tell them the more I feel like I need to. For me it just fuels the need. It's hard and I still mess up but if I really try not to bring it up I notice it sort of settles down in my head. I try and break habits these feelings give me. Because the more you act on them the more it gives your anxiety a feeling validation. I know it's hard and I still slip up but it helps me. I know it's not easy.
- Date posted
- 3y
that’s good advice thank you
- Date posted
- 3y
I know its hard. I struggle with this too. I just try and keep reassuring myself that you had no intention of it coming across that way. And I know it's hard to not think about how it looks to others but if there was a problem I'm sure it would have been communicated. And I know all of this is easier said than done. I've had restless nights thinking about how someone thought about what I did. I just have to keep reassuring myself I know my intentions were not that. I hope it gets better.
- Date posted
- 3y
i feel the same way but i end up having to repetitively tell my boyfriend in detail everything that happened and he really doesn’t care because he knows i wouldn’t do anything to cheat on him but then after those moments like if my friend got too close to talk to me or they hugged me or touched my shoulders or something i would freak out the next morning thinking that i was flirting and second geussing myself and switching up my story from the night before convincing myself i did something bad
Related posts
- Date posted
- 25w
I often feel like i did something wrong even tho i am positive i didn’t, my boyfriend and i have been together for like 6 months and i’ve been completely loyal to him the whole time but recently i’ve been feeling the need to confess that i cheated on him even tho i didn’t and there’s absolutely no proof that i did something even close, i don’t talk to other men and if i do my boyfriend has full access to my phone and it’s usually a friend or me asking a simple question but i still feel the need to confess even tho i’ve done nothing wrong🥲 someone please help it’s so confusing
- Date posted
- 25w
I often feel like i did something wrong even tho i am positive i didn’t, my boyfriend and i have been together for like 6 months and i’ve been completely loyal to him the whole time but recently i’ve been feeling the need to confess that i cheated on him even tho i didn’t and there’s absolutely no proof that i did something even close, i don’t talk to other men and if i do my boyfriend has full access to my phone and it’s usually a friend or me asking a simple question but i still feel the need to confess even tho i’ve done nothing wrong🥲 someone please help it’s so confusingggg
- Date posted
- 24w
17f I don't know if it's very ocd related cause I actually did something wrong but I have another serious year long real event ocd which caused me moral ocd and now I feel extremely guilty because of that thing I'm going to talk about because now I feel like me being a better person after my big event was just a lie if i did this So basically me and my friend were at our other friends birthday and she came with her boyfriend. I saw him like once before and at first I didnt find him attractive at all. But the second time we met before the party (me, my friend and her boyfriend shared an uber to get there) I kinda noticed that he is kinda cute but yk I didn't do anything about it since he is my friends boyfriend. Then I got drunk at the party and when I'm drunk I become way way more talkative and affectionate, so I became more attracted to him. I mean I didn't like full on flirt with him, but later I realized I was purposefully making jokes I knew he would laugh at and enjoyed every piece of attention I got from him, like I would say stuff that I knew would catch his attention without openly trying to innitiate a conversation with him, cause it would be too suspicious or obvious. Now I don't really remember was I actually fully aware that I'm borderline flirting with my friends boyfriend, I mean I wasn't blackout drunk, but I was drunk and it was 2 months ago. I remember when I got sober and started recalling the other night I felt guilty and promised myself that when we meet again I won't repeat it. So here comes another party we are both invited too. It was my friends (his girlfriends) birthday, and it was a bit far away from our town, so we had to take a bus and then also an uber. Since I can't pay with my card my friend was supposed to call and uber for me and I would just pay her back in cash. But she was very busy with preparing stuff for the party so she asked her boyfriend to call me an uber and then text me the details. So I was extremely neutral and short with my answers to him like the bare minimum cause I remembered how I promised myself that I won't initiate anything weird. Then he met me where the uber stopped to show me the way to the house they rented for the party and still while sober I was very neutral with him. Like polite but not overly friendly yk And then everyone got drunk. Especially me, I usually drink a lot at parties and this time wasn't an exception. And again. I wasnt openly flirting with him. And this time I actually didnt innitiate interactions with him a lot at first. But then I got really drunk and me and my friend were joking around how I actually made out with her before her boyfriend did when we played the bottle a year ago. And we were like "it would be funny to tell him". So basically he came in the room and my drunk ass says something like "hey bro fun fact I actually made out with your gf before you got a chanse to do so" trying to tease him. The dude looked shocked and I thought it was funny. But then he kinda pulled me to the side and asked wtf did I mean by that. I didn't really get why is he so confused and said "I mean yeah we did but like it wasn't serious we just played bottle and there was also a bunch of other girls she kissed it was just a game yk" but after I said this he got upset. So he went to talk with his girlfriend and I realized I maybe shouldn't have said that so I texted her asking if everything is okay and apologized for making that joke and messing things up. She responded that everything it's fine and I didn't really mess everything up it was just a misunderstanding. So after we continued drinking they came back and he ended up sitting next to me on the couch and I still felt bad and a bit akward so I apologized for that joke and he said that it's all good he just got it very wrong, he thought I meant that we made out today like at this party instead of a year ago. So drunk me just formulated this very poorly and he who was also drunk understood it in a very wrong way so its fine now when he knows the context So basically apart from this dumb joke drama I also feel guilty for I wasn't really trying to interact with him a lot but I wasn't stopping it if he did? Again he was just being drunk and freidnly and I know he's loyal to his gf and wouldn't hit on me so even if I'm attracted to him and enjoy his attention I'm not stealing anyone's bf? Like that was my drunk logic But I feel so bad now. Especially because of this joke. I didn't make it for sole purpose of grabbing his attention, I genuinely thought it's funny. But still the attention thing was a part of the motive. And then during the apology, even though I was sincerely apologizing cause I genuinely felt bad, I was still kinda enjoying him talking to me??? So yeah not good not only I was kinda crushing on a friends bf I also made him upset because I wanted to talk to him and tease him by making that dumbass joke
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