- Date posted
- 6y
- Date posted
- 6y
My harm ocd was triggered by by children but it started way later. I had been binge watching alot of documentaries on Netflix about woman who kill for like I week straight. I use to love those kind of shows. One night my 5 year old asked me to play with her and all of the sudden this thought just popped into my head, I can't even remember it exactly but I was shocked by it so I kept thinking about it. I ended up in a night long panic attack. From that point on I couldn't get it out of my head and i just kept thinking what does this mean about me! What kind of person am I! I love my kids so much and they have been my world since the day they were born. So I kept ruminating for weeks. I went into a severe depression, I stopped eating and I woke up every night in panic thinking I would black out or go crazy and hurt them. It was a nightmare. I eventually went to my therapist and got on paxil. That seemed to make the ocd subside but I hated the side effects so I weaned off of it. I have been dealing with it on my own and some days are better then others. Alot of exposure has helped me and I feel alot better then I did 5 months ago.
- Date posted
- 6y
my mom had exactly that post partum. she hated being alone around my big sister because she was afraid of hurting her.
- Date posted
- 6y
Me! Started when baby was 2 months old. I got triggered by a story I heard and that was it... wouldn’t stop, thoughts got worse, I stopped eating, was so anxious, panic attacks etc. I tried so hard to keep up with everything but the compulsions and mental review was so overwhelming...I eventually started therapy and things got better but it took time. I still struggle some days though. How old is your baby? What are you experiencing?
- Date posted
- 6y
Some days suck :(
- Date posted
- 6y
I’ve been in therapy for two years - some days are amazing! Some days or weeks suck so bad :( I’m so happy that you got help right away! Therapy was such a good thing for me (still is)
- Date posted
- 6y
My baby is 2 months and it got triggered by a shaken baby video at the hospital the thoughts were what If I shake the baby or hurt the baby in some way or what if I lose my mind and family and end up locked up I’ve started therapy and Prozac and I’m on my way to recovery
Related posts
- Date posted
- 21w
Please read this. I’ve had ocd pretty much a lot of my life but never knew what it was until my senior year of highschool. I’m 21 with 2 kids and i believe i’ve had pocd a little bit before my daughter was born (which was 8 months ago). It made me start looking at all kids differently and i hate it. But it really started triggering me about 3 months ago. I’ve been thinking if i’d intentionally touched or harmed my kids the wrong way, or any kids for that matter. This started giving me false memories (or at least hope they are). I’ve been having panic attacks, yelling at myself, punching walls, praying, and even thoughts of ending my own life. I grew up in a severe toxic household throughout my childhood and teenage life. I’ve never wished that on my kids since i became a dad. I wanna give them the life i never got. I look back my photos of my children and i feel like i’m a complete fraud of a dad. I cannot look at my kids or be around them a lot of times. I can’t hold my daughter right. I can’t change their diaper when they need it. Even my son came and was hugging on me the other night while i was watching tv and i acted like a stranger to him. I can very little do this stuff sometimes because it’s either i get relief or i push my thoughts as far back as i can. I get scared if i did something to not just my kids, but any other kids in the past. I have such a a great life and such a beautiful family. It was hard and stressful at first being young with a family but i couldn’t be more thankful at all for them. I’m just so lost and stressed right now that i just don’t know what to do anymore
- Date posted
- 19w
There are times my harm ocd has me convinced that my feelings of self harm or suicide and harm are real and that any moment I could commit the act on myself or my family. Is there anyone who can chime in on this. I feel like all the time I want to leave run away or avoid my family because of these thoughts. Like I shouldn’t be around my children and I don’t trust myself.
- Date posted
- 14w
Please comment. Just say if follows along the OCD pattern or not. I don't need reassurance per se! My daughter was laying across me and every time I breathed a certain way I was getting a groinal sensation. I kept breathing like that anyways (ugh idk why), and then my mind told me I had hurt/a**aulted her that I might as well do something else to hurt because what's more. So idk why or what overcame me other than the thought of doing it because my mind told me I had hurt her already ("my mind literally made me question what to do and I guess the only thing I could come up with was using my elbow) and causing another feeling but it came across my mind to elbow her, and I elbowed her crotch or side/thigh area. Which caused another very unwanted groinal sensation. Then I began FREAKING smooth out. And I've been stressing since. I feel like as a mom I don't deserve to be hers anymore. Idk what overcame me but my therapist says it's all OCD. I was doing SO well! Is this really OCD? This has all caused me a great amount of anxiety. I feel like a terrible person and mom. I just need help knowing if this is OCD. Not wanting reassurance. Just wanting to know if this lines up with the POCD I've been diagnosed with by my current therapist.
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