My partner and I are currently broken up/taking a break. Has anyone with ROCD dealt with this? How did it work out? I’m scared and relieved but I know I love them.

Relationship OCD

Stuckinmyhead

Date posted: 3y ago

You’re not alone. We’ve had lots of breaks and breakups. Just try to focus on taking care of yourself and try not to worry too much about what tomorrow will bring 💕 trust that no matter what happens, you are strong and can get through it

kittea

Date posted: 3y ago

This is where I’m at rn and I just want you to know you’re not alone. Like I know it’s the right thing to do but it really hurts and I still love him but I’m kind of in the anger stage of grief right now where I’m hurting a lot and processing the frustration of why and how it happened. You are not alone. I just went back to therapy because of the breakup and that may sound silly but breakups are so hard and you need extra love and care thru this time. ❤️

m00se

Date posted: 3y ago

Yes! You can do this. I know it's silly but there's a taco bell commercial where the girl gets a text from her ex, rolls over, and dreams of tacos. I try to remind myself that will be me if we break up. I will focus on things that bring me joy if I can just roll over and get through the night. One night at a time. And if it's meant to be it will be and you'll be stronger either way. I'm here for you.

m00se

Date posted: 3y ago

Same as Stuckinmyhead. My so and I have had a ton of breaks and breakups. One that lasted for 1-2 years. That one was really difficult for me. I would get really obsessed with the fact that everything that went wrong was my fault. I would think if we had the "right conversation" everything would be good as new. I would contact him to talk about it and it would only set us both back. It got really bad for me. I became so obsessed with the idea of losing him I chose to do really bad things to my body and threatened to kill myself. After that night we didn't talk for a long time. We got quarantined together after a friend's wedding and it took a lot of work but we had both grown a lot. I recognized the things I was accountable for and focused on being a better person. If we got back together then cool, but if not then I had already done the hard part of losing him for a long period of time.

kittea

Date posted: 3y ago

I’m personally at the “right conversation” point. I’m having to force myself to have space because every time I reach out to him to check in, it’s like I start from square one and hurt all over again

m00se

Date posted: 3y ago

@kittea Sorry I accidentally replied to your comment on the thread.

kittea

Date posted: 3y ago

@m00se no problem!!

Stuckinmyhead

Date posted: 3y ago

I just want to say I resonate and really appreciate your story. My partner and I broke up in June 2021 and this is our longest break up yet. He’s seeing someone and I still keep trying to fix it and make it right. It’s just making everything harder but I am so obsessed with it, and devastated when we have a set back. We were in a good place and actually had a really lovely friendship up until a few weeks ago when things got difficult again. But yes, I really appreciate your view on it. I’m glad you’re in a better place now

m00se

Date posted: 3y ago

@Stuckinmyhead I'm really glad you appreciate my story. That makes me feel heard. I hear you. That is gut sinking to hear and I can't imagine what you're going through. I really do feel for you and I'm here if you ever want to talk. I've learned a lot from this and I am still learning but I do want to tell you that every day is a constant battle. I have suicidal ideation and when I fall back in my ways and connect myself to my relationship, I believe that I am not good enough if we fight and that we're only back together bc I'm weak. I also want to say that I don't have to know you to know there will be moments where you think "this is why it happened." It might even be as small as reacting different to something you used to would have compulsed about. To me, you sound like a person who is very understanding, determined, kind. You are lucky to have you in your life. I'm really sorry that you're going through this but you are very important, smart, and deserve to grow.

Ellen_l

Date posted: 15w ago

Advice?

I’m having a big OCD relapse and would like to hear anyone’s tips on how to be present and healthily deal with these intrusive thoughts and the “need” to preform compulsions. Thank you!!

Elliesmith

Date posted: 13w ago

Is this a symptom of soocd

I’m 25 and never ever thought this before my soocd relapse. I have a bf of 5 years. Never been a high libido kinda girl. Don’t get me wrong I do get turned on by my bf but not like every day you know? - That had always been in the back of my head, is this normal and ok? But my ocd has latched onto the most scariest what if EVER. My brain is now saying How do you know you won’t prefer to sleep and kiss girls if you haven’t tried it: and it’s that unknown that is scaring the shit out of me. I DONT AND NEVER HAVE wanted to sleep / kiss a girl. But now my intrusive thoughts is all I think about!!! I don’t want I don’t want I don’t want??? So why does my brain think BUT WHAT IF??? I know ocd thrives off uncertainty which is why I think this is happening? But I don’t wanna find out or work it out because all I want is to be with my bf and marry him!! Is this just the epitome of OCD?

ashleynicoleeee

Date posted: 12w ago

Does anyone else experience this in their relationship?

When my boyfriend and I are apart, it honestly feels like I've lost all feelings for him. I start questioning everything, wondering if I even love him at all. Then, when we're finally together again, the memory of those earlier doubts creeps in and completely ruins the moment. I get so caught up in overthinking and analyzing my feelings that I can't even enjoy being with him. It's like I'm constantly second-guessing myself. The worst part is, sometimes later, when we're still together, I do feel the love. But then the anxiety kicks in again! I start worrying that I'm just faking it because I had those doubts earlier in the day. It's this endless cycle of questioning, doubting, and overthinking, and it's exhausting. I'm really struggling to stay present when we're together, and it feels like this constant cycle is preventing me from truly connecting with him. We have been together for three years and we love together, and I just started feeling this way about a month ago; it’s been almost every day since. One day, I randomly thought about breaking up with him. Our relationship is healthy, especially compared to my previous toxic one, where I was anxiously attached for two and a half years. My boyfriend is very supportive of me. I have talked to him about my doubts and everything I’m experiencing, and he continues to support, care for, and help me through it all. I am very grateful for that. One aspect of my current relationship that I would like to improve is our communication, but we are both willing to work on it together. I often find that my overthinking leads me to question whether I really want to try to fix things or if I’d rather just continue as we are. This creates a constant push and pull in our relationship. Has anyone else experienced something similar? Any advice on how to break this cycle and just be present in the moment? I'd love to hear from anyone who's been through something like this.

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My partner and I are currently broken up/taking a break. Has anyone with ROCD dealt with this? How did it work out? I’m scared and relieved but I know I love them.

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