- Date posted
- 3y
Alcohol and intrusive thoughts
Hey guys! I have something that’s severely weighing on me. I don’t know if it’s OCD or not, but I also know I should feel guilty about it. My BF and I have been arguing, but we are working through our differences. I got drunk yesterday and I was chatting with one of his “friends” at the bar. I already struggle with ROCD. Tbh, his friend could possibly be a good match for me and he’s attractive. We could be a good fit for each other if I were single, but I don’t even know if that’s true. It doesn’t matter because I’m with my BF. While we were chatting, he said a couple of flirty things to me, and I had this overwhelming feeling while we were talking that I wanted to be with him and not my BF. Like so overwhelming that I was thinking wow oh my gosh if I had to choose right now I might choose this guy instead, we would have such a better relationship, etc. I didn’t want my BF to come over because I wanted to be with this guy. Yes, this situation sounds HORRIBLE I know. I didn’t act on this, it was just in my head. Or at least, I sure hope I didn’t and am not forgetting something :( that’s a worry I have. First, obviously the guy shouldn’t be flirting with me. Second, it felt good that he felt an attraction back to me, and I hate that because I don’t want to even think that way. Today, I’m disgusted by my thoughts and those overwhelming feelings in that moment. I feel so overwhelmed with guilt and I love my BF and want to be with him. I’m not sure if these thoughts were drunken wacky thoughts or if I need to tell my BF what I was thinking. Do I confess this? This seems more serious than just intrusive thoughts. Was it the alcohol? Seriously, please please help me🥺 I genuinely want to be with my BF and I don’t condone those feelings I had, I think it may have been super duper heightened due to the alcohol