i think i’m starting to understand sexual attraction and my experience with it on a whole new level. maybe some of these reflections could help others with soocd! arousal and sexual attraction are two different things. you can get aroused by many people, but sexual attraction is the mental state of actually wanting to engage in sex - in real life. what i’m starting to realize about myself is that i don’t experience sexual attraction like most people do and i might be demisexual. i need to form an emotional bond with a man in order for me to feel sexual attraction (which is totally different than simply wanting to form a deeper bond before having sex) most people see someone they find attractive and want to have sex with them. now that i think about it, i don’t feel that with anyone ahaha and i actually get a little weirded out and confused when people talk about sex. like just because you think someone’s attractive, you want to have sex with them? why? i can get aroused by different sexual fantasies and erotica that don’t align with my orientation, but when it comes to actually having a sexual attraction to someone, it is with a man and it will come to me only when i’m emotionally connected to him. then the sexual desire follows and it’s usually romantic in nature, but sometimes solely for pleasure

What’s everyone’s experience with loss of attraction to their preferred gender? (Not looking for reassurance, and I know people say stop trying to get it back) When I see a good looking woman, I feel sad that I can’t get feelings like I use too. Like the very bottom of my stomach feels heavy like it’s depressed… I know I want to be attracted to woman but this SOOCD and false attraction is destroying me.

Hi everyone, I’ve been really anxious lately, and I just need to get this out of my head. Someone recently told me that maybe I’m bisexual — that I might be more sexually attracted to women, but more romantically attracted to men. That bisexuality is not 50/50. And ever since I heard that, I’ve been spiraling. The thing is: I don’t want this to be true. It scares me. I don’t feel romantic attraction to women, I’ve never wanted to be in a relationship with one. But yes, I get aroused by fantasies involving women — and that makes me feel broken or like I’ve been lying to myself. I love my boyfriend deeply, I don’t want to lose him. I want to feel fully connected to him, physically and emotionally. But now I’m stuck in this obsessive loop of questioning: “What if I’m just in denial?” “What if I’m not really straight?” “What if this is why my libido is low?” It’s exhausting, and I don’t know if this is OCD, anxiety, or if something is fundamentally wrong. Has anyone else felt this split — romantic feelings for one gender, sexual feelings for another? I feel so alone and scared. Thanks for listening.

Im starting to have suspicions that im demisexual, its not OCD telling me i am its a genuine thing. Ive just noticed i have many traits of a demisexual person and maybe not being able to feel that attraction ive always expected to random ppl just passing me is the reason POCD has been so hard