PinkLotus
- Date posted
- 3y
[Deleted][Deleted]
- Date posted
- 3y
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PinkLotusPinkLotus
- Date posted
- 3y
Yes please
Lulu 🌸Lulu 🌸
- Date posted
- 3y
I’m okay, but struggling quite a lot with ROCD.. I can totally relate with you on the part that the harder you try, the more difficult/impossible it seems. I feel like all my thoughts abd feelings are clouded by ROCD and I can’t tell what are my thoughts and what’s the ROCD… which is scary because I love my partner so much, but the ROCD is making me question everything to the point where I’m convinced that I don’t love them/am only using them etc. You’re not alone with feeling this way 💕
PinkLotusPinkLotus
- Date posted
- 3y
Thank you for relating to me and letting me know I’m not alone, we really have to try and stick to our guts here ❤️
Lulu 🌸Lulu 🌸
- Date posted
- 3y
Me too… it’s hell. Happy to talk too :)
PinkLotusPinkLotus
- Date posted
- 3y
Hi how are you
PinkLotusPinkLotus
- Date posted
- 3y
I feel exactly the same way. I’ve always struggled a lot with sexual intimacy, it’s the most challenging thing in the world for me to be able to put my fears aside and be vulnerable. It’s caused sexual anxiety which means I’ve always struggled to fully enjoy those intimate moments but now with my ocd theme latching onto sexual attraction, it’s all become one giant compulsion. Now I don’t feel anything and it feels like I never did. I know I did in the beginning and when my boyfriend visited last September but it’s all muted under a blanket of anxiety. The most aroused I’ve ever been has been with my partner yet my mind tries to convince me he’s not enough when he’s all I want.
Lulu 🌸Lulu 🌸
- Date posted
- 3y
I’m so sorry you’re going through this. Uhh the power and hold that OCD has sometimes really is insane. When your own thoughts and the obsessions and compulsions all get mixed up it’s like a giant fear cocktail 🍹🥲 I read somewhere that focusing on the physical feelings in the moment can help, but for me things like gut feelings and instincts also feel like they’ve been ‘hijacked’ by the ROCD, because whatever the situation, my gut feeling is always to run.
PinkLotusPinkLotus
- Date posted
- 3y
@Lulu 🌸 It’s the worst cocktail I’ve ever had personally 🥲 Rocd hijacks my intuition too and makes everything feel like a reality. I know you can’t choose who you’re attracted to but I really wish I was attracted to my boyfriend because I want to be so badly but it feels like I’m not and I never was but I really want to be.
Lulu 🌸Lulu 🌸
- Date posted
- 3y
@PinkLotus It’s so hard to feel this way. I feel the same as you’ve described, but instead of physical attraction, for me it’s the idea of romantic attraction/falling in love etc. Like, something feels different, why did my feelings change, why can’t I feel that “in love” feeling I felt at the start. I don’t know if this helps, but sometimes I try to remind myself that I am the one that can make a choice. Sometimes it feels like everything is out of my control, but at the end of the day, we can take steps to regain that control. Sometimes I feel empowered by that thought. It may be a long road to healing but just by being here and talking about it, we’re on the right track. 💪✨
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