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Anonymousk

Date posted: 3y

women with porn addictions

I grew up being addicted to porn which I’m not proud of! Unfortunately, I watched it at a very young age and I’ve watched ALL TYPES of porn. So, growing up you get desensitized to of all of this. A lot of people think only men get addicted to this but it’s not true! The problem now is that having SOOCD and knowing I’ve watched lesbian porn and all other things can really take a toll and confuse someone! My natural attraction has always been for men and now that I struggle with this theme it’s like my mind goes “oh you’ve watched that so you must enjoy it and would act on it” it gets so confusing and hard because since I was so young I was like “oh I guess everyone else does this etc.” So, when I was young I’d be like “oh yea I’d do everything no matter with who” I’ve never acted on it and don’t want to now because I was seeing people as sex objects! I only have a desire for men but my ocd can’t let go of the fact that I said “oh I’d do anything” but point is I just wanted to post this for anyone else who has struggled with this and might get very confused due to being desensitized to so many things. Also, it’s OK if you’ve watched all types of porn it doesn’t really say anything about you. 💓 Also, I’m kind of at a point where if someone said this meant I was gay I’d just be like ok sure LOL at the end of the day I know who I want to be with. I just wanted to shed some light because it really shows that porn can make you see people who aren’t even you preference as sex objects and that’s horrible.

Sexual Orientation OCD

Lina

Date posted: 3y

Oh my god same I grew up & got into all types & one of them was lesbian porn. Now I feel like for a while I was addicted to lesbian porn & I’m afraid since I was turned on by it I would act on it in real life. Even though I’ve only had crushes & wanted to be with guys.

Anonymousk

Date posted: 3y

Yes I’m the exact same! I’m afraid I’m gonna act on it and it freaks me out! Also I only ever wanted to be with guys too but this porn thing has really been backfiring on me and scaring me so much lately :(

Lina

Date posted: 3y

@Anonymousk Yes I’m trying so hard to let the thoughts pass through but it feels so strong & real I don’t know how not to react because for so long I have been

golden retri...

Date posted: 3y

I’ve literally never admitted this ever before, but I think I grew up with a porn addiction as a woman too. Now that I’m sexually active, I’m realizing how much it’s seriously messed up sex for me. I’m trying hard to quit … I’m actually stopping self-pleaser in general (maybe tmi haha). I also felt really bad because I would only really “do it” to women and I think, even though I believe I’m straight, it kind of trained my brain to not associate sex with men if that makes sense, really made me think hard about if I was gay, and it’s just so unfair to my bf :(

Lina

Date posted: 3y

Yes I understand exactly what you’re saying I wish I could never started watching porn it has screwed up a lot of things including sex with my bf

Lina

Date posted: 3y

@Lina It is like I can’t get aroused & in the mood too busy worrying (maybe tmi lol)

Anonymousk

Date posted: 3y

I totally understand you :( it’s like I only want to be involved with men but porn messed up my views of sex and made my brain mainly get off to visual videos. It’s making me question so much about myself but I know I only want to be with a man but I think porn just messed up a lot for me.

Anonymousk

Date posted: 3y

@Anonymousk Also I feel like if I never watched porn I wouldn’t have this issue to begin with 😭😭😭😭 lol

Lina

Date posted: 3y

@Anonymousk Same :(

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RW95

Date posted: 19w

Has anyone gone through this, or currently going through it, need to know that I am not alone in this (18+)

I can't look at 18+ videos, comics, etc. I am straight, but SO-OCD tries to make me think I am not And the thoughts turns to feelings, and makes me scared, uncomfortable, sad, because I know this is not me. And when I try to imagine myself being with the woman on adult videos, and comics, my OCD gives gronal response not at the girl, and it fills me with fear, and anxiety, I always loved, and was attracted to women but I can't and it caused me to be depressed, and I keep ruminating I keep trying to focus on her, but it's so bad that I avoid those all the time now. I am wondering has anyone gone through something like this, or currently is, and wondering how you have done to combat this!

niu

Date posted: 18w

SOCD, Real Event, porn

I never read someone talk about this so I wanted to know if it applies to anyone as well. For context: I deal with ROCD and SOCD but I do identify as straight and am in a (happy) relationship with a man. What often triggers me is memories about childhood and adolescences about having the groinal toward nudity in porn or music videos. Because I can’t deny having watched other things than straight porn and experimenting with porn I simply can’t stop trying to figure out what that might have meant and if i deep down have actually a other sexual orientation than the one that I feel comfortable identifying with. I only hear people talking about random triggers but never the REAL memory of arousal to pornography and so on.

Pogoshow

Date posted: 15w

I’ve been dealing with SOOCD for over a year now, and I have been having a very hard day today. I feel like I just need someone to talk too, my whole life I’ve always had girl crushes and always wanted to be romantic with women . Ever since I posted this picture on instagram and one person said I looked “zesty” in it , which is when I started obsessing about being gay . I feel like I put so much meaning to these thoughts where now I’m always checking how I feeling around men. I had a really bad porn addiction for a long time and bad anxiety which fucked up my sex drive. I feel like I doubt if I’m attracted to women when I know I am , but the doubt is so overbearing where I start to believe it . I never was interested in men sexually, and my ocd makes me feel like I like the thoughts even though I feel no pleasure out of it. I feel like I lost who I am as a person . It feels like I don’t even know what my sexuality is and it’s really upsetting to me . I meant this girl the other day and she is the most beautiful woman I’ve ever met and I just feel like ocd is getting in the way😭😭😭 please any advice or comments

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