I can never stop thinking about a relationship that ended 2 years ago. We didn’t even date for that long and I’m in a very happy loving relationship now but the OCD just latches onto that one relationship and everytime I wake up until the moment I go to sleep, I think about him and that relationship; the ins and outs and it’s downfall and how it came to be and I don’t know WHY. I don’t feel anything for this man anymore but this thoughts won’t stop and I just don’t understand why. Anyone relate? I’m suffering so bad. I just want peace from this awful illness.

I think everyone, if they’re over someone or not, feels upset when they’re ex moves on because it would feel like a replacement but when you’re in that situation you need to remember that they’ll never have what you had. The relationship between you and your long distance ex was unique to you and the love he had for you will probably always persist in some way. Also, remind yourself that you don’t have to think about the sex, when I see my ex in a new relationship I’m sure it will cross my mind and try to burrow itself in and hurt me but that situation isn’t anything you can control so unlike other intrusive thoughts, I think you just need to distract yourself instead of battle it (that was very long, I hope it made sense lol)

You’re very welcome, I wish you luck! Remember to find love in yourself first, you’ve just gone through a rocky break up and need to recover❤️

Me too. I dated my ex for 2 months and I can't get the stupid cunt out of my head. It's been five months since we've been apart ffs xx

I still love my guy but I got dumped three months ago, I’m still experiencing obsessive thoughts about our past relationship even though I’ve accepted it’s over. I’m even starting to convince myself that I was a lot of horrible things that I never was

??Yes I would be very thankful for your OCD in that case. However, don’t worry, you weren’t harassing him, you just wanted reassurance and that’s perfectly normal. Unfortunately, some people just don’t understand mental illness. My ex would call me paranoid, and while I agree and I know he didn’t mean it in a bad way and that he was just saying it to get me to realise it was my OCD, it wasn’t very nice

That’s okay, you’ll find that a lot of people in this world are dicks. It’s super good that you’ve recognised that and aren’t chasing after him. As for your OCD, I’m here if you want reassurance

I understand that, my ex was my first boyfriend too, and oh dear, I’m sorry he lied to you and slept with you while doing so, that must suck. I’d like you to know though not all guys are like that, I know that my relationship ended but before we went long distance and I got OCD, it was actually pretty amazing and I still wouldn’t change what I had for the world, I don’t regret the past 2.5 years of my life and some day you’ll find someone like that. (Yes, our relationship did go to shit but in my case, it was down to circumstance not each other).

I can see that, I struggle with it too but they won’t ever have what you had. What you and your ex had will always have been and I can’t really comment on the gay thing, I think of my boyfriend found that out about himself I’d just feel weird

I've been convincing myself that too. Like maybe it was all me. But no he was evil.

The evil word is triggering me a lot right now, feel like he is ganna turn evil if he isn't already. Or that I'll get possessed by him. This is rediculous how fast my ocd latches onto a bad thought

The word “evil” and “controlling” are my triggers, I feel like I was controlling even though all I ever did was ask for reassurance. My partner didn’t do anything wrong and neither did I but I feel like I need to blame myself for something because my OCD made him feel like a bad boyfriend

Lol well my ex told me I was harrassing him with all my messages and so I finally stopped messaging his horrible ass. Because my ocd is telling me if I message him again he'll call the police for harrassment. So I suppose ocd is a blessing sometimes

My ex made me feel thick all the time and that I was too obsessive. And then I find out the girl I was worried about him liking, he wants to sleep with now.

He told me who he fucked as well when he knew I wanted him back

I slept with him a month ago and it was a pile of shit but I acted like I enjoyed it. He was so two faced and acted all loving etc. And then barely spoke to me and said it probably won't happen again but if it does it does but I'm not saying for sure to get your hopes up

So much other crap as well that he said etc, he didn't tell me huge secrets either and I found them out when we broke up. I'm not a blabber I keep secrets

He doesn’t sound that great, maybe you dodged a bullet. How’ve you been since the break up?

He fucked my head up and made my ocd a complete pile of shit. I will never ever ever forgive him for how much he hurt me

I've just been mentally shit for the past 4 months. My ocd was okay whilst I was with him for the two months. And I felt like cause he was a cunt, and cause he was okay towards me, I felt like I'd won the lottery. He bought me what ever I wanted. Spend over a thousand pounds on me easy in the two months we were together. And then the break up happened over me saying I hate how rude some of the things he says to me sounds. I asked him if he wanted to change and he said no.

Felt like I wasn't even worth someone to be nice to me. I still feel like that now. And like every man now will just lie about loving me.

Again, he sounds like a douche. Relationships aren’t just material, in fact the material side shouldn’t even matter. Sure, it’s nice to have nice things, but if the person isn’t nice, you shouldn’t be with them

Sorry about the length of this. Cor it's nice to let off some steam about that man though! Wish I never met him. I did chase after him though. For 4 months! I've not for a week. And I'm never going to again actually because I deserve so much better, he will probably end up with a stunning girl who has a personality of a cunt like him

I can tell you that isn’t true and you will find someone who is right for you, I think you just need to take a while off, find some love for yourself and then work to that better relationship

SEE! That’s what you’ve gotta think! He’s not worth anything more than what he is!

And yeah true. But I thought him buying me things meant he loved me. Things moved so quick and I spent more time with him than I did my ex before him which was long distance and lasted 7 months. So he was basically my first real boyfriend because he lived close and the sex was incredible and his fake love was so believable.

And yeah, definitely! He's not worth someone like me who actually loved him a hell of a lot. He lost the best thing he could have ever got.

I had someone like your ex. My ex before my most recent one. He was my first boyfriend. And it was so loving etc. And it ended because he went to uni. I still have love for him, but he's gay now and I can't help thinking about how they have sex when I thought I was well over him. But I'm a bit upset that he's found someone else. Not sure if I feel better or worse that it's with a man.

I don't want to think about how he has sex with him but I wonder how it can feel as loving as it did when I was with him either because it's a man, or because it's not with me, not sure which one

I struggle with letting go

Thank you for that reply ❤️ You're right, both of them were experiences and lessons, and noone will replace with either of those relationships had. I hope I find someone good for me soon.