- Username
- SarahLynn
- Date posted
- 5y ago
You might never know. We don't and can't know a lot of things with utmost certainty--especially the way OCD demands. You can still choose to live by your values and chase your goals--use those as a guide for what to do. OCD will make us doubt EVERYTHING, so we have to choose to live without certainty if we want to move forward.
I worry a lot about how my relationship will manifest in the future, especially in regards to marriage and children. But it is impossible to know for certain what is going to happen. I'm learning to live with the possibility that something *might* happen. I'm learning to focus on what is going on now, so that I'm not sabotaging the present by worrying excessively about the future. It's hard, but I want to move forward and enjoy what I have now because now is all that exists.
Thank you so much! I’m never really had these thoughts to the extreme that I did earlier and it really freaked me out. Your words are comforting though. I appreciate your view of how you move through this towards what you want.
You're welcome! OCD can be really scary. It's so great to have this community. We're all battling OCD together!
Anyone with ROCD get married and get past it?
I'm not married, btw. I'm in a long term relationship, and I struggle with ROCD.
This is my first bf and we're going to marry on july. My ROCD has been the worst after we engaded. I hope that after wedding I can be a bit more free about my thoughts. During my life my jumps to unknown and to uncertainty have been terrible but after jumps I have feel better and my uncertainty have come tinier. Very often I have felt freedom and happiness you can never imagine. I want to believe that it will go like this also on this time allthought it feels impossible many often because of ROCD and my thousand doubts. It has been very rought with my man last months, but he still loves me and want to merry me allthough I have said bad things and my feelings have been messy. His love gives me hope.
That’s amazing. I’m so happy for you. Good luck with your marriage!
Hi everyone! I wanted to ask a quick question. My partner and I are interested in taking the next step in our relationship - getting engaged then getting married. However, I obviously still struggle with ROCD which distresses me. I am very attracted to him, but have these thoughts that “he’s not the right person for you” even though that couldnt seem further from true. If anyone on here is married, can you share how you made the personal decision to get married to your current partner? Thanks in advance!!
Hello everyone, I really need help or advice (advice that isn't triggering please). My girlfriend and I have been together for almost a year and a half and I struggle alot with ROCD. I get scared that I don't love her anymore or I'm just in denial. Alot of the time it feels like the feelings aren't there and I I even get uncomfortable at times whenever she tries to kiss me or anything. On the other hand whenever I imagine myself getting better and the feelings coming back and having a future together it seems like it's what I want. Sometimes, it's like I have urges to break up and get scared I'm better off like that, now I don't know what to do but I do know that I want to just get better and stay with her. I just want to know if anyone here feels like this or maybe gets these urges and gets uncomfortable with there partner. Again, please no triggering comments. I would really appreciate it.
I am scared. I love my fiancé. I love everything about him with my heart and soul. I just feel so empty. I have ROCD if you haven’t noticed lol. I keep going in cycles and phases where I feel ok with my past trauma regarding my ex partner, and feeling like maybe the trauma is still there. If you’re asking now at this point if there’s any feelings involved- no. I don’t feel romantic feelings of the sort. But, I am so scared. I am scared to see this person in public, so I don’t go out. I am scared to think about this person because what if I am thinking about them because I want them? It’s triggering, and I always make sure to not ruminate. But, as I meditate and I do ERP, I find myself feeling more lost and more susceptible to the pain of it. The trauma does not pain me anymore, it’s the thought that I might never be able to give my fiancé the life he wants. So, now I have to contemplate giving up a future that I have thought about. Waiting to make the engagement public to my family, for absolutely nothing. I love this person, they have been pure and honest and open. I am young, still. What if I am just with the wrong person, and this isn’t the person for me? It’s all a facade and delusion the COUNTLESS times I have redirected my thoughts to just tell them “You’re wrong, I love this man.” As I sit here, on the verge of crying, I wonder…. Is it even OCD, or am I just a bad person for concealing the thoughts and not giving it direct attention? Most importantly, is the man I love the one for me? Or is it truly all a joke?
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