- Date posted
- 6y
- Date posted
- 6y
you are enough! if he couldnt handle the challenges of loving someone with mental health issues, its his right to say stop. i hope you can remind yourself of the many ways you are a lovely person besides having ocd! just because he cant handle you, doesnt mean you are a burden or not lovable. he simple didnt have what it took. remember, ocd is a thing you carry around, like a big and heavy backpack, but it is not a part of you. im very sure that you have a million little ways of being more than just enough! you are not ocd!
- Date posted
- 6y
We were together for almost 4 months and Ik that’s not a lot time but I’m also an empath so I love deeply and we were so close and he was first person I fully trusted despite my trust issues and who I got fully comfy with
- Date posted
- 6y
Exactly. If he can't handle that your mental health history is not you, but a challenge distinct from you which requires sensitive handling, he is not the right person for you.
- Date posted
- 6y
He is the one who is not enough. You are so strong you don't even know ♡
- Date posted
- 6y
Hang in there for the person who says “this makes me love you even more”! Your OCD is likely making you a person of resilience, empathy and deep insight into our human condition — all desirable qualities in a partner.
- Date posted
- 6y
But you shouldn’t give up in love :( I would have never gave up on him when he’s upset or stressed or hurt
- Date posted
- 6y
That just means you deserve someone better that accepts you totally!
- Date posted
- 6y
You deserve someone who respects your religious beliefs! I also have those boundaries and the one who was right for me respected them. (We’re now married.) So sorry you have to go through this. I know it hurts like a deep overwhelming abyss (aka h*ll).
- Date posted
- 6y
How long were you together?
- Date posted
- 6y
i totally understand that! it can be tricky to understand why he did what he did when you wouldnt do the same. we have different values and priorities like that. wait, maybe you could think about it like this; you have ocd and i’ll bet my left pinky that you would pay anything to get rid of ocd now! because its fucking exhausting and heartbreakinh. but since its not that easy to just leave it, you have to deal with it whether you like it or not, and try to recover. but when he suffers (and not even close to the amount that you do) under the weight of your ocd, he actually has the chance to get rid of that problem. if you could pack your bags and leave ocd, would you?
- Date posted
- 6y
I understand that. It’s hard. He obviously wasn’t ready to give you all you need. I’m sorry.
- Date posted
- 6y
Plus it probably makes you more accepting of your future partner’s struggles, whatever they may be. So hang in there and trust your amazing self!
- Date posted
- 6y
It just hurts so bad:( idk why he had to give up. And he also gave up Bc I told him that I wanted to wait till marriage to have sex Bc of my religion and I asked him to ask for permission b4 touching me and got mad saying “ I don’t like having barriers on what we can and can’t do” and he said we could stay friends and then he blocked me:( I’m hurt
Related posts
- Date posted
- 23w
Hi I was on here a few days ago talking about how I have POCD because of CSA & how I couldn’t trust my bf. I ended up telling him about this while we were out in nature one day, a pretty secluded area but there were still children visible in the area. We changed by holding a towel up around each other. That was a bit too much for me but I needed to change. He had to urinate and he went behind a tree but I told him just to go in the water because if anyone catches any glimpse of him on accident, it’s illegal and just wrong especially because there were kids across the river. I ended up confronting him about my OCD fears, which was causing me to distrust him (I don’t even trust my own brothers). This man was my first everything, I loved him so much I wanted to trust him so badly. He ended up being offended after I shared my fears. He was offended that I would ever think of him as someone who would hurt kids (like my dad did to me 💔. and yes, he knew what happened to me as a child before alllll of this happened so I though he would understand). He was so offended he told me it was time to go home. He changed in f*cking public. IN PUBLIC AFTER I TOLD HIM THAT CHILDREN MIGHT SEE. We drove 1hr+ back home in silence. It didn’t even process in my mind fully, after this happened I was texting him how much I loved him and didn’t want to break up. But as I started to think about that moment I just feel sick in my stomach. I hate myself I hate my l-fe I genuinely don’t want to b3 h3r3. I’m probably gonna get rid of myself. I can’t do this anymore. I can’t even be in love in peace. I can’t nothing is normal in my life nobody is normal I can’t do this anymore
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 18w
I’m disappointed and upset with myself. Growing up in an immigrant household that didn’t believe in therapy as much, I mostly only really took care of my mental health when it came to playing sports. I was not a great communicator when it came to my feelings or being vulnerable with my partners and friends.The world makes you feel like it’s normal to not say what you mean and that you have to be indirect with a lot of the things you say. It caused a lot of fights, hurt feelings, and words I should have never said between me and my recently ex girlfriend. We had broken up about a week ago, but today is the day she said she did not want to talk to me anymore. I wish I did more than journal and meditate. I wish I got treatment for my OCD earlier, or just any therapy at all. I wish I learned to be better at communication way before I met her. Maybe I wouldn’t have lost her, maybe if I had been more honest and more direct about my feelings, our fights wouldn’t have happened. I wish I could have been more for her. I wish I could have been more for myself. I wish I took mental health, growing, and healing more seriously. I am disappointed for my skepticism and being okay with stagnating as a person. I should have healed and addressed my issues sooner. I don’t know what else to do. I don’t know how to move on. It feels like I blew my one chance to be with the one person I really loved and the first partner I planned on something really long term with. I feel both the weight and pain of disappointment in myself, and losing her. I know the breakup is hitting her too, and I am worried about her wellbeing. They say there are 5 stages of grief, I wonder what stage this one is. And I wonder how long it’ll take me to just come to acceptance. I want to be better. I want to not hurt people I care about. I want to be the man I am supposed to become.
- Date posted
- 16w
im not diagnosed but for the past five years i've been seeing A LOT of ocd symptoms in myself. i kinda accepted that i might have it and learning about people's experiences helped me a lot. i was in a really bad place when i was 16 but at some point i got better (so i thought) I've lost one relationship and i healed from loosing it and then i fell in love again. we we're together for a year and six months. i was really happy for most of the time but unfortunately we we're both not really stable mentally and we both had some mental issues. i helped my girlfriend and i supported her the best i could. she managed to move in in my city and we started living together november. at first it still was her who had a lot of issues (probably depression and being very suicidal) i was struggling and i was really stressed but i tried my best to help. i think eventually she got better in january everything was happening all at once. i've lost my job and we had to move out to a different apartment and in the same time she gained new friends at work. earlier my ocd was showing up occasionally but since that time i think it got kinda worse. i have very low self esteem and when my girlfriend got really close with one girl in her work i started feeling uneasy. i never wanted to be a jelous and controlling girlfriend but my head was constantly telling me "she's will get bored of you bc of her new friend" "she's starting to care more about her than you" and it was unbearable. we talked about it few times and she tried to reassure me but at some point i saw she's not feeling good about my self doubt and being jelous. months passed and everything was getting worse. she become more and more distant, she stopped showing me any affection, she stopped asking me on a dates, she stopped flirting and even on my birthday i had to please her to stop texting someone and focus on a movie we were watching. and now two days ago she broke up with me. few days earlier we had a serious talk and she told me she doesn't feel like doing anything romantic with me anymore and when i asked why she told me she thinks she got tired of me. i asked her what about me makes her tired and she told me "it's because you can't do and cope with anything" or smth like that (its hard to translate it to English). and i understand that it could be tiring bc i was doing bad mentally and i asked for reassurance a lot even tho i knew it's my compulsion and even tho i told her i will try not to. i am also a very anxious person and i was really stressed aboud my new job and money and a lot of things and all of it made her tired. i feel so guilty that i couldn't try harder. i feel so guilty for not noticing I'm actually loosing her earlier. or maybe i actually was noticing it by being scared when she started to be mkre excited to spend time with her friend rather than me? i don't know i just feel so bad bc i still love her and i don't know if I can't stop bit i already asked her few times if she's sure that this is what she wants and i told her i will try harder and i booked a visit with a psychiatrist but she told me she's too tired to try. im scared she's also struggling mentally. i don't really know what i even want to hear from you guys i just really want to disappear bc i can't stop blaming myself for loosing my soulmate and the best person in the entire world, the most beautiful, funny and sweet person. she doesn't need me anymore. she doesn't want me and it hurts ass hell. and the fact that it might be all my fault hurt even more
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