Tillyyyx

Date posted: 3y

ROCD Recovery!

Just coming on here to say I have no more intrusive ROCD thoughts about my relationship for a while now😊😍 the only thing that has helped me has been going completely cold Turkey - no compulsions , I limited my phone use to just texting and answering calls but NO going on google and reading articles and every time ANY negative thought came to my head about my relationship I blocked it out straight away by closing my eyes and visioning an object or anything that takes my focus off it- it would still linger in my head but I just forced myself to view it as white noise - even those ‘what if I’m ignoring a non ocd thought’ I forced myself to block those out to and label them as ocd . It was extremely difficult at first! I’m not going to lie , but what motivated me to go cold turkey was a comment my NOCD therapist said that stuck with me : “if someone with ocd just ignored their ocd thoughts completely for a couple of weeks, their ocd would go away because they would break the brain pattern ‘. I decided what have I got to lose ? I had been struggling with ocd for nearly 3 years and nothing I was doing was helping I was just spiralling! So I was really strong and I’ve never felt better ! Every relationship is truly different and unique and I promise you you do not and cannot mathematically or rationally figure out your relationship . Love IS a choice ! I’m happy in my relationship , we still argue sometimes , I still have small doubts just like everyone else in a relationship does , but the doubts are small and passing they do not consume every minute of the day and I feel much closer to my boyfriend then ever before, the love had grown a lot because I was sabotaging a lot of the intimacy and closeness we could of had before with my anxiety. Love takes work, love grows if you want it to, good luck all😊❤️

Relationship OCD

calico87

Date posted: 3y

Thank you for posting and sharing this. I have been trying to do the same with my thoughts. I’ve noticed that it feels like my thoughts are “quieter” when they come up. Like it’s in another room instead of in the same room with me. I’m glad to know I am on the right track. 😊

Tillyyyx

Date posted: 3y

@calico87 Yes on the right track!For sure 😊

Charlie

Date posted: 3y

@Tillyyyx This post has given me the hope that I too can overcome rocd, I keep going through phases of knowing I like her and then phases of sadness and anxiety that I don't like her anymore and things are different to the way they were before

Tillyyyx

Date posted: 3y

@Charlie Hey I don’t want to offer you reassurance because I know it fuels ROCD but even in relationships without ocd there are highs and lows in relationships but with OCD the negatives are thrown out of proportion and so it seems a million times worse ! To me love is a choice and is definetly something you work on and grow into, I used to view it as a feeling but with more knowledge on the subject I realise that lust and infatuation is not love it’s a chemical reaction to someone we initially may find attractive but this feeling is very short lived and fleeting and so don’t base ‘love ‘ on feelings or how the media portrays how love ‘should be’. When we change our perspective of ‘ falling into love’ as some kind of involuntary act and see love as something you chose and grow into it naturally cause so much less anxiety because you don’t put expectations on how you should be feeling all the time .

Charlie

Date posted: 3y

@Tillyyyx Thank you so much

dragon_calves

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 3y

Thanks so much for posting this! We need more stories like this :)

mirbrach

Date posted: 3y

I have been feeling so turned off to my husband of almost 19 yrs for a few yrs now. It’s constant torture. I wish I could just ignore the thoughts which I have not been able to which makes me feel this is not rocd. I have worked with an erp, NOCD therapist with no progress and I had to stop bc it was getting way too expensive.

dragon_calves

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 3y

I’m sorry you are going through that! Im married too and completely understand. What do you do when you have those thoughts?

mirbrach

Date posted: 3y

@dragon_calves It’s very hard bc I have them all the time. I just try to go near and hug my husband anyways. What do u do when you have your thoughts?

dragon_calves

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 3y

@mirbrach I hug my husband too! I also try to follow ERP treatment. Such as not seeking reassurance, ruminating, checking etc. I also try (hard though) to treat my thoughts as just thoughts.

mirbrach

Date posted: 3y

@dragon_calves It’s just so hard bc now when I hug my husband I feel both good and disgusted all at once 😥

dragon_calves

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 3y

@mirbrach And that is ok! It is ok to feel disgusted towards our partners sometimes. Just let the feeling come and go. Try it.

mirbrach

Date posted: 3y

@dragon_calves I can’t seem to let go of the disgusted feeling which is constant. It just stays the whole time and doesn’t go away.

dragon_calves

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 3y

@mirbrach Start by NOT fighting the feeling. It is strange, I know, but that is how it has to start.

Tillyyyx

Date posted: 3y

Love is built, love is a choice and I truly believe that. It’s the hard work that pays off in the end and the most valuable relationships are the ones that challenge us to our core and show us sides of ourselves that we mend to work on , real love is changing parts of ourselves in exchange for the other person . I don’t care what other people say , If they say that sounds toxic and you should never have to ‘change’ for anyone , maybe in a superficial short term relationship you can get a way with being more selfish but in a true loving relationship it is inevitable that both people will have to adapt to the things that aren’t so appealing in some ways . View your struggles with attraction to your partner as a test, something to work on and improve not a ‘sign’ or a negative. Find things that will help develop intimacy between you both, learn about each others turn ons more and I promise you all is not lost if you both put in the work, resentment can kill love in a relationship my biggest help has been to learn to communicate more honestly , Sometimes we believe it’s lack of ‘attraction’ and it’s often times hugely due to feeling like we’re walking in egg shells or hiding things xx

mirbrach

Date posted: 3y

@Tillyyyx Perfectly said!! Thank you!!!

vendel

Date posted: 25w

‼️I beat OCD. here are my best tips‼️

❤️we all just want it to be over already, but do not set a deadline for your recovery (e.g. "i give myself 3 months to get better") and let yourself go at your own pace ❤️accept that healing is a very, very non-linear process with highs and very dark lows.. it's a lifelong process for us those with ocd, when you stop suffering you start learning ! ❤️WITHOUT ruminating on this, identify the root of your obsessive themes. they hurt so much because they go after your deepest wounds. clearing out the fear or pain that stands at the base of your obsessions will help (e.g. my sexual ocd came as an emotional outlet for my inability to accept a new family member in my life) (e.g. my solipsism ocd came from the deep fear of being alone and abandoned) ❤️the truth will always surface. even if you have no hope anymore and not even asking for reassurance helps, put that last bit of your trust in the other people that are in good states of mind and who are trying to help you. remember that you're living by a distorted mind and if you can't trust your own brain, have trust in others. those who love you are your life net when you're down in the slumps. trust me. ❤️ocd can be caused by chemical imbalance. if you feel like you need it, don't be reluctant to try medication. it's important to have the correct dose and the correct meds. it may change a lot before finally being effective, but it can help A LOT. it was lifesaving for me. (I personally took 125 mg sertraline at 14 years old) ❤️cliche, but the exposure part of erp is in you already. we get exposed to relentless obsessions and terrors already by our minds, our part is the response prevention. throw yourself into the depths of uncertainty and fear by refusing to act upon your compulsions. any learned behavior can be unlearned, our brains are changing! 🧠 it does feel like we can't risk because we can't "know for sure" and we better be safe than sorry, right? well, screw this. unlearn these behavior and live life your own way. ❤️connect with other people with ocd. community is our pillar as humans, especially those communities who share our suffering. ❤️we tend to ask for reassurance a lot and other just reassure us because it's rational to them, not being aware thar it only causes us more pain as we have distoerted thinking. teach your loved ones to respond to your reassurance in a way that doesn't feed the cycle. (e.g. reassurance seeking- "hey, are you ABSOLUTELY SURE that I didn't hit an animal on the way back home??" ❌️wrong response- "no, you didn't, I already told you, I don't remember hearing or seeing anything!" ✅️better response- "I can see you are really distressed right now, why don't we go cook something together/watch a movie/paint together/etc.." ❤️keep your faith close to you. there is something bigger around us that surrounds us with love and takes care of us. even if you don't believe in a god, spirituality goes beyond religion. for me, this higher being was the sky, and everytime I saw the giant clouds I'd tell myself that they felt my emotions and they're watching over in my suffering. strangely enough, this pillar i built in the clouds was strong and really did give me a helping hand. who's to tell these connections we make are not real?

tupperware

Date posted: 23w

fully recovered

hi guys haven’t posted here in awhile but i’ve fully recovered and have a really good life now lots of friends enjoying school and have a really loving boyfriend who helped me out of my ocd even if he didn’t know he was helping me (just through being loved and supported i felt happy enough to recover) hope u guys can recover too i had severe ocd and basically got better within 2 months by myself :)

dslite

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 21w

Recovery is possible

Just wanted to give some hope to those who are having ocd spikes, spirals and worries. This past year I have regained my life back. I went from beginning to isolate myself, being convinced by my ocd that my hobbies are bad and that I should avoid things I enjoyed, and having constant panic attacks. With the work of IOP, psychiatry and nocd, I have made great strives towards my future. I now don’t avoid things and instead embrace my life and ANY possibility that may come. Don’t let the ocd bully you. Yes, I have intrusive thoughts still but I am able to go about my day instead of obsessing over them. You can find this too. I encourage anyone on the fence to please seek help if you are in a tough time, it can literally save your life.

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