- Date posted
- 3y
- Date posted
- 3y
I haven’t seen anyone on here say it’s a chemical imbalance because that hasn’t been proven. Just like how depression was “said” to be a Chemical I’ll imbalance but that has been debunked. Regarding your situation, everyone is different and you might have extreme OCD that might need inpatient therapy. I can’t say, but a professional can. You also have to look at yourself and what you’ve been doing during those 10 years. And was ERP done correctly with a professional? How many years has that professional had under their belt to help you? Also, what else we’re you doing during this time period: we’re you giving into compulsions, ruminating, constantly seeking reassurance, not going outside and only staying inside, etc. Were you also on a daily schedule? Did you work out and did you learn healthy coping mechanisms and throw out bad coping mechanisms? If you have other mental illnesses, did you also get therapy for your other mental illnesses? Have you been told that facing your fears will feel like death but you don’t die and that yes, in extreme cases you will possibly have a panic attack—or many—during exposures because your brain/OCD doesn’t want to be face to face with triggers. But it needs to in order for you to get better. Same for trauma therapy. It sucks and I went through it and I panicked, but I was DONE, absolutely DONE not living my life and being stuck on a horribly depressing loop of nothingness. There’s A LOT of factors regarding getting better. No one size fits all and it depends on the person. But I’d definitely wouldn’t say ERP doesn’t work. For some people, if you’re at 100% anxiety but you can get it down to 50% anxiety and that’s all that indivisible can do, that’s GOOD. 100% anxiety all day every day is horrible. Been there, done that. I’d say I’m at 15-20% anxiety level throughout the day because I have 4 other mental illnesses and that’s just my state of being. But looking back 8 years ago when I couldn’t get out of my dark walk in closest or else I’d freak the hell out and go into psychosis? I’m living an absolutely amazing life. You can too.
- Date posted
- 3y
@Nica 1. Just because you didn’t see anyone say that doesn’t mean I didn’t, because I have. 2. I have been in therapy over ten years. I have worked closely with a trauma therapist and a OCD specialist (who has been in practice over 35 YEARS! He used to run a treatment center for OCD patients and wanted to do one on one work). Both have confirmed exposure therapy will NOT work for me. Because the cause of OCD is different for everyone as you said; but that means that the treatment is different due to the reason. I have been told my OCD is due to a chronic illness I have had since I was 12 that requires constant control and I can’t handle not controlling things because of it. So your wrong it doesn’t always work. I do not qualify for in patent treatment due to my chronic disease 🙃
- Date posted
- 3y
@Nica Adding onto that…because of my chronic disease a massive panic attack and stress can LITERALLY kill me. So again wrong. I can not allow myself to reach that point.
- Date posted
- 3y
it tends to make my panic attacks hit harder when I get exposed to triggers so I can relate somewhat I’m terrified of it cuz of that exact reason idk if others have an anxiety disorder or not but I feel like I can’t breathe right now cuz the thoughts are so repetitive I cry in anger and loss of hope most of the time I will try medication next see if it eases my ocd AND anxiety but yeah I totally hear where ur coming from I’m going on year 3 with mines.. scared I might be like this forever in all honesty. Maybe get on medication that works first then go from there
- Date posted
- 3y
@valkyrie2015 I am so sorry you are experiencing similar issues 😔 I was on medication before and they caused seizures 😂🙃 Do you live with people? I notice any time I am alone or with just my boyfriend on vacation I am so much better. The thought of knowing I can “fix” something whenever I want/need to, makes the urge to fix it way less. That’s the problem with my experience. Living in a situation where if I need to disinfect/wash/move something I can’t because I will get “ Reprimanded”
- Date posted
- 3y
There are other treatments like Deep TMS and certain Neuro surgeries for treatment-resistant OCD. You may have another condition that makes ERP harder, but most people heal using ERP even without medication. Don't give up and don't worry what others say. Treatment should be between you and your provider.
- Date posted
- 3y
@yup_its_ocd I have never gotten better from exposure therapy. As mentioned in my response to multiple other comments (🤣) I actually feel 💯 better when I am in a calmer environment. My OCD almost completely diminishes. The OCD specialist I was seeing has told me he highly recommends me moving out. But everything is so expensive and with my other health condition I can’t find it the extra money for that 😅
- Date posted
- 3y
@yup_its_ocd Thank you for being kind and supportive 💜
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 3y
I’m sorry you are struggling! Agree with what others have said. We don’t know the circumstances of your toxic environment. That can certainly be a factor here. Honestly, though, exposure therapy is complicated and isn’t as straightforward as people think. I’ve done exposure therapy before and was still engaging in compulsions without knowing—which undermines the whole damn thing. Working with a specialist that has lots of experience makes a big difference. Exposure therapy works and is the thing that works the best. Other alternatives have worse outcomes. Are you on meds? That can be an important supplement. I hope you get some relief soon :)
- Date posted
- 3y
@dragon_calves As mentioned before I saw a OCD specialist who said himself exposure therapy does not work for everyone and it doesn’t work with me. I was not giving into compulsions. I was under close “supervision” with my therapist during this time.
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 3y
@Cat_attack I’m sorry you feel disgusted by these comments. And I’m sorry treatment hasn’t worked for you. This community is ERP-based, as that is the gold standard treatment. If you OCD goes away from easing environmental stress, great. Most people with OCD don’t experience that. I hope you find relief, escape from toxicity and treatment that does work.
- Date posted
- 3y
@dragon_calves I find that pretty f”ing” sad that an entire support group is based on ONE treatment plan. Wow
- Date posted
- 3y
@Cat_attack There's always a possibility of talking about other treatments, but even ERP is a new treatment by comparison. Prior to ERP there were no treatments for OCD. It was a hopeless disease you were essentially stuck with. Right now though we have Deep TMS and Neuro surgeries coming out as bleeding edge, but last I checked most people on here haven't had those yet. I personally was looking into Deep TMS, but it's super new and expensive.
- Date posted
- 3y
Comment deleted by user
- Date posted
- 3y
@Cutegiraffes Thank you!! It is disgusting that people in the comments are so certain if I tried it more it would work. It doesn’t. For me personally if I am under less stress (away from certain people I currently live with) my OCD almost completely disappears. When I am able to relax my blood sugar comes down and I can think more clearly and the obsessions are way less, causing the compulsions to be way less. Blood sugar is a huge factor in OCD control (if you didn’t know). If I am away from my living situation I also find peace in the fact that I can clean whenever I need to. Which actually makes me want to clean LESS. It makes me relaxed and comfortable
- Date posted
- 3y
I hear you I’m the same right now you are not alone please remember that
- Date posted
- 3y
@XMASEVE2008 Thank you so much 😔💜 I will pray for you to find peace
Related posts
- Date posted
- 21w
sorry this is super long i just wanna know if anyone else has been thru something similar bc i feel super alone 🩷 i have super bad contamination ocd. it was bad already but my house was like my safe space until a few months ago someone brought something into my house that i considered ‘contaminated’. and so then i felt like that part of the house was contaminated, then it spread to everything outside my room (since family is moving around touching stuff) and then somehow i got convinced everything in my room except my bed is contaminated and i need to wash my hands after touching it. in my mind its like the contamination just infinitely spreads to things after the tiniest bit of touch. idek what im afraid of anymore or even what the original thing was but i can’t let it go. when i have to wash off contamination i have to wash at least 4 times or until it feels right, or sometimes take rlly long showers and wipe down all my stuff. i even throw away food and clothes or just whole items sometimes because they feel so contaminated i don’t want them in my space. i can’t be super near people or have anyone touch me, and i also can’t bring anything new into my room since it had to go through the entry of my house which feels contaminated. i feel like all i do is lay in bed and then wash my hands and do compulsions so i can go eat or do other stuff around the house. also i never go out because i’m bc people outside make me feel dirty, and i hate thinking about how many people have touched stuff in stores or in public and stuff. so im just in my room worrying all day. i feel so trapped and the contamination/avoiding it is all i think about anymore i barely have time for anything else and im never present when i talk to people because im worrying about if i accidentally got contaminated. im starting erp next week and knowing that im going to have to expose myself to things is really freaking me out. does anyone else have this kind of ocd ? im exhaustedddd 🥲🥲💔
- Date posted
- 19w
I’ve recently been struggling a lot with OCD. I have had OCD for a long time I just didn’t realize it until more recently. About seven months ago I developed panic attacks one day randomly at work. I thought I was having a heart attack and went to the hospital where they told me it was just a panic attack and I assumed I would snap out and be better within a few days. However it didn’t. Here’s where it gets scary, I was staying at my then boyfriends house while dealing with blurry vision, anxiety attacks everyday, and more (unsure of what was going on). But at some point I saw my bfs (pew pew 🔫) on his table and it sent me into an anxiety attack after sudden thoughts that I was going to hurt myself with it. I begged him to put it away when I’m not looking so I didn’t know where he put it. He did. These thoughts lasted for about four days but began to go away. (I thought that was it and I would be back to normal). Unfortunately though I ended up moving back in with my family when we couldn’t get my panic attacks under control in time for me to get back to work and pay bills. However, coming home brought up a lot of trauma from when I was kid. My anxiety got worse but I didn’t have those thoughts again. About two and half months ago though, I got sick and went to the hospital where they gave me steroid pills and a steroid shot but sent me into some kind of psychiatric event. Ever since then though, I have been suffering from harm OCD, I have had moments of intense anger that I usually have to completely walk away and go on my own because of how intense they are, and it feels like it’s getting worse. Today I felt fine until about and hour and half ago where I started to dwell on the fact that my suicidal thought was influenced by my OCD and at the moment my OCD is at the worst it’s been. This caused me to get suddenly really depressed and I started crying thinking about how I can’t handle this. I then saw a post talking about how suicide rates are high for people with this form of OCD and it made me question if I am mentally strong enough to pull through this. I fear that at times I’m getting worse. I have good days but I have a lot of bad days. Unfortunately this sent me into such a bad panic attack I went over to my nanas crying about how I can’t deal with this. I took a 0.25 mg Xanax which helped calm down the panic attack portion of it but my brain is still uncomfortably active. I guess I just need hope. I’m so saddened by this. It’s like my life took a total 360 in 10 months and got even worse since the steroid shot. Idk what to do about it. I can’t stop the spiral. I talk to two different therapist weekly and start more next week, making it 5 times a week. I feel no improvements…
- Date posted
- 14w
(Long post warning) Hi, I’ve been struggling with severe OCD for six years now. it started in 2019 with my theme being getting sick/emetophobia. it devastated my life. I almost didn’t graduate high school from it. I remember washing my hands for three hours one day until they were nearly bloody while crying and asking why I could not stop doing it. I remember id have to write and rewrite sentences when I did my English homework and that’s why I nearly failed that class. I remember how I would spend up to thirty minutes to an hour pacing the halls of my apartment while my mom was asleep until I neutralized the thoughts about throwing up and I could finally go to bed. I don’t know when it happened, but my theme switched. Sometimes in late 2020 or early 2021, it switched to POCD. It started with a single thought, and I focused on it and it’s been my theme since then for four years. It has been absolutely destroying me. I feel so disgusted and lost and just tired. My compulsions are severe now. I thought they were bad before, but now they’re ten times worse. I can’t eat, drink, change my clothes, walk, or even do things on my phone normally. I’ve developed so many mental compulsions that it’s so intricate and complicated yet at the same time I’ve done them so much that they’ve become normal. An example I have is if im putting on a shirt and I have a “bad” thought, I have to take it off and put it back on two more times (that’ll make it 3 times I put the shirt back on - odd numbers are my safe number). I have to have a good thought on the third time otherwise I have to take it off and put it on two more times to make it five times I put on that shirt. If not that then I just put on a different shirt because the original is now tainted with my bad thought. I can’t open apps on my phone. It’s with the numbers again. If I open TikTok once while having a bad thought - I have to close it and open it two more times and so on. Sometimes I do it up to 30 times. So I just don’t do things usually. I don’t turn on the TV because I know I’ll redo it. I don’t open a book or grab it off my shelf because I’ll have to repeat the action. I can’t even lay in bed without getting up and redoing it even if im exhausted. I just feel so helpless. I don’t know what to do. I feel disgusting and even now my minds screaming at me that I am dirty and what I think is true. I just wish I was free of this, I wish I could just live my life. I’ve wasted hours and days because of my compulsions. I mask it so well around my friends. I don’t do them in front of anyone or I’ve learned to hide it well. But when im back home alone, it goes haywire. I just want to live again.
Be a part of the largest OCD Community
Share your thoughts so the Community can respond