I’m confused why I can’t imagine having a boyfriend! It’s kinda causing me so distress because I really want some and then their is another part of me that’s like no you don’t is this my anxiety or just me or could I be asexual? I also suffer from hocd

Hummm... I don't know well how to help or start but I will try. First of all, I don't experience OCD by myself so I don't know how feels and functions all of it perfectly, I kinda know a good amount, maybe more than the average, but again, I'm not a professional or know it by myself. I got diagnosed few time ago with GAD and I have some expressions of my anxiety reflected in some obsessive characteristics, more likable as the compulsions of OCD, so I thought entering here could be helpful :) (but I'm also in therapy!). But what I'm trying to tell here is that by bringing my experience I don't want to interference with your obsessions, therapy or recovery, so please acknowledge this. Well, first, how older are you? I'm currently 19, soon 20, but I started questioning my sexuality at 17, and realized I was asexual at early 18 yo. I didn't have relationships experiences before or with kissing or sex and I think that was actually better for me because it let me question what I feel without questioning if something could've interfere it. It felt a lot more free. Also, knowing I am asexual was quite a relief to me because it let me understand a lot of things that I didn't understand before. Well, something useful for understanding this is that: - attraction ≠ action. so, if you feel attraction or not that shouldn't interfere with what you do, you can have sex and be asexual! it sounds quite crazy but actually it's pretty common :) - also, being asexual is different than being aromantic. asexuality is the lack of attraction towards sex with someone, everything that involves something sexual with someone. being aromantic is the lack of romantic attraction towards someone. you can even think that romance and a significant other is awesome and want it and still being aromantic! - sexuality it's a spectrum, it's not black and white. there's also a spectrum between being "sexual" (allosexual actually) and being asexual. for example, if you feel sexual attraction sometimes, or very little, or in weirdly specific situations or towards few persons in your life, chances are that you could be in the gray area of the spectrum. similar happens with being aromantic. - it's okay if you make mistakes. there's nothing wrong with having a tag that functions for yourself and then funding out that you were wrong; it happens, you don't harm anyone by mistaking it. - use what works better for you. as i said, "feelings before tags"; if tagging yourself as asexual helps you feeling better and understanding better you, then use it! if you find it caging and feel better without it, that's fine as well! if you are still confused and doesn't want to tag yourself you could think of "questioning" or not having a tag and it's perfectly fine, a lot of people do it. - sexuality is fluid, so it can change. so there's no problem with changing it (what I said before haha) - thinking yourself as asexual or not doesn't change what your future will be, you just understand yourself better and that, there's no consequences with it (search the song: "For me - Dearlie" in youtube if it helps you :) )

Thanks so much! I don’t really think I’m asexual because I think about sex at least once a week and I do want to be in a relationship! Today I went to the grocery-store and I saw a really cute cashier and he liked me and all I did was get happy no weird feeling! And I can’t really relate to that song it’s a really good song though!

Me too. It’s frustrating. It’s like “that’s not what you really want. Stop thinking about it “

Yes plz help

Yes it exactly like “are you sure you sure you want a boyfriend maybe you don’t want one” and it’s kinda the them of ocd I really want a boyfriend but I just can’t imagine having one maybe it’s because I’m on the theme of asexual ocd or am I really asexual

But here is the thing I don’t think I’m asexual because when I get a little older I really do want sex

Yes. It’s like I kinda want it. But i just don’t know with who. It’s like I lost all my interest in guys at the moment. Now when someone mentions a relationship I almost always after I trying to imagine myself with a guy a picture of myself with a girl pops up. It’s frustrating and it’s creeping me out. I just don’t know

Same but like it feels forced like ocd forced and It is now just no one I picture or it’s a girl it use to be a boy

I can totally relate. It’s exhausting

I'm happy that it helped you!! And that you heard the song, it's quite nice tbh! Well, I can say that I don't think about sex (in absolutely) but I kinda want to be in a relationship, just without sex involving it. And I didn't get the weird feeling? If it's something that you thought we feel or something that you felt before for you? idk Anyways, I'm happy that I could help something, and hope you feel better with yourself by finding that advice ☺️; it doesn't matter if you aren't asexual, at least I could help and bring also a bit of asexual awareness which is quite nice ;)

That great! With my hocd my sex drive has been lost but it’s starting to come back and I definitely do want sex one day and I tbh like I said once a week or every 2

Hehe hi, I'm actually asexual and could help with it (but would I trigger or increase your obsessions with it? Anyways, about sexuality it's not good to pressure yourself tagging you. Have this advice: "First goes feelings, then tags" :)

Right!