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Username: Michie

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 2y ago

My OCD decided to switch up. Themes that is

So my new current theme is relationship ocd. More exclusively sex related. I feel like If I’m not completely aroused for intercourse all the time then any time I’m not “100% in the mood” having sex with my boyfriend is rape. I don’t want to try anything to get in the mood (foreplay, romance, etc.)because if I try to get in the mood it’s not for me it’s because it’s what he wants. it’s either I’m ready now or not and if I’m not 100% ready for it and we do it then it’s rape. Does anyone else have this? I have such intense anxiety around this it ruins me for days.

Relationship OCD

Username: hiitsemmyhiitsemmy

Date posted: 2y ago

Yeah I feel the same exact thing but its when we are in a position where I dont have full control of what im doing. Sex is a really tough thing for ocd

Username: Michie Michie

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 2y ago

@hiitsemmy That makes total sense! I can enjoy sexual things when I’m in control and when it’s just me but when it comes to involving someone else I get scared and think it’s rape almost every time

Username: LocnaLocna

Date posted: 2y ago

True sex is confusing with OCD.

Username: Stacy QuickStacy Quick

User type: Therapist

Date posted: 2y ago

This is very common when you have OCD. You are not alone. Please know that. OCD can take on any form and can latch onto so many things. Sex, of course being one of them. Thoughts are not the same as action, ERP would teach you that what you are experiencing is thoughts- the more you try not to focus on your feelings in the moment the more you will be hyper-aware of feelings or lack of feelings. That doesn't mean that is indicative of how you really feel. I hope this makes sense. Have you done EP treatment yet?

Username: Michie Michie

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 2y ago

@NOCD Therapist - Stacy Q. Thanks you yes I am currently in ERP therapy it’s just hard for me to use what I’ve learned and apply it to this situation. The unknown and lack of certainty which I know ocd feeds off is difficult.

Username: LocnaLocna

Date posted: 2y ago

You should never act intimately unless you are 100% in it. Ultimately you have harmed yourself when these instances occur. Grief sets in. Think about your partner as well. How would it make them feel to have all this resentment building over a completely avoidable situation that was never addressed through communication. Sex is a two person thing. Subtract one and you got nothing.

Username: JazzCrabJazzCrab

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 2y ago

@Pillows I think your comment is really making it worse, tbh.

Username: GvocdgirlGvocdgirl

Date posted: 2y ago

@Pillows I think you forgot ocd makes you doubt everything, you can really want to be intimate with you significant other, but ocd makes you think and feel many different things you really don’t want. They’re called intrusive for a reason. Please avoid saying these type of comments because they can trigger and not help at all because your addressing it as a real problem, not an ocd problem.

Username: JazzCrabJazzCrab

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 2y ago

@Pillows If I only had sex when I was 1000% sure I 100% wanted to I would never have sex. My OCD causes me to question literally everything I do in my relationship.

Username: JazzCrabJazzCrab

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 2y ago

Yes, same. My ocd surrounding this arose when my partner told me sometimes he can tell if I’m not into it, and then he feels bad, etc. (disclaimer, this was honestly super kind of him, he was just saying “hey if you don’t want to do it, it’s really fine, just be honest” was the other part of that conversation”) but that cause me to question how much do I ACTUALLY want to do it. So I totally understand.

Username: Michie Michie

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 2y ago

@LittleBird That’s so nice to hear! My boyfriend is the same with knowing I’m not into it but he doesn’t want to upset me by saying something during intimate times so I’m always the one stopping and he always listens which is a breath of fresh air.

Username: JazzCrabJazzCrab

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 2y ago

@Michie Good supportive partners are the best 🧡

Username: Michie Michie

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 2y ago

@LittleBird I have trauma around sex all together so working through that aswell as ocd saying you don’t want this he’s abusing you is really hard to deal with

Username: JazzCrabJazzCrab

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 2y ago

@Michie Totally understand this. You’re not alone :)

Username: GrAYY

Date posted: 2y ago

My OCD theme is so embarrassing

My overall root fear has been loss of libido. It triggered my hocd, my rocd, and my health ocd. I don't know how to get over it. I want sexual activity to be fun again and not a compulsion. I want my libido back and I think about it all day every day. I stopped taking my medicine in fear of pssd, and now it feels like it's actually happening to me. I pray that nothing is wrong with my brain, relationship, or physical body that's stopping me from having a normal sex drive. I would do anything for an answer.

Username: Tiredoflife

Date posted: 1y ago

R*pe ocd please help

I’ve been struggling with this theme where I wonder if my bf ever r*ped me. For some time now . It has ruined my life . And now people are saying coercion is r*pe . There was coercion sometimes in me and my bf relationship but I never felt like it was r*pe . Maybe there’s a spectrum of coercion. I hope so bc I don’t think my bf is a r*pist and it breaks my heart. I’ve triggered bc people told me coercion is r*pe . A moment of stuck on is one time , my bf wanted to me to try anal while we were already in the act of sex and I was no I’m scared to tried it but he was persuading me so I gave in and he went slow and now this is the tricky part … I “rmeebr “ a moment that I feel like maybe it’s a false memeory tied on to a real event but it feels like it happened but I’m also not quite sure but ima just say : while we were attempting to do anal I said ok I’m done and then he was like let me stick it in some more and I let him and when I was like alright I’m done bc that’s a far as I going to go he stopped . I feel like this happened but not exactly sure how it happened. But even if it did I feel like it’s not r*pe bc he did stop . Yes he was like “let me stick it in some more” . This theme is ruining my life .

Username: Tiredoflife

Date posted: 1y ago

R*pe ocd ……. Again

I’ve been having this theme for a while now . And now I’m questioning about my first time receiving oral by my bf . This happened in 2021 . I can’t rmeebr it good but I’m starting to have thoguhts what if it was r word and questioning it . I don’t believe it was and feel like it’s ocd messing with me . I hate this it’s so horrible . But I believe we had planned to do oral that day and when he came over we were going to do oral for the first time . Now I remember being hesitant pulling down my Pants but I can’t remember that day good . He was slowly pulling down my pants and so was I believe and I was kinda hesitant . I don’t think I was scared bc I wasn’t ready but scared lie what if it smells down there bc I did and still do struggle with BV . I don’t really rmeebr this day which is weird since it was my first time doing oral but if I truly didn’t want to then I wouldn’t just said no but I don’t think I did . I mean I was hesitant but I allowed it still . I think it’s just my ocd fucking with me again . And I would it like reassure but advice and maybe if someone can relate

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My OCD decided to switch up. Themes that is

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