[Deleted]
- Date posted
- 3y
jag92jag92
- Date posted
- 3y
I feel exactly the same! I’ve had it in the past but had no idea it could be ocd it was just something I tried to bury. But recently we got engaged (we’ve been together 6 years and have a baby which was the best thing ever) but since we got engaged my brain keeps bringing up the thoughts that I’m not happy and not attracted to my partner anymore and that if he way happier with someone else like a woman because I get a really strong groinal. My brain keeps telling me because my feelings are more romantic towards my partner then sexual it’s making me really scared that I’m actually a lesbian in denial …I started therapy last week but we haven’t officially started erp yet
jag92jag92
- Date posted
- 3y
@Anonymous_1 I feel the same!!!!
jag92jag92
- Date posted
- 3y
@jag92 Even though I have my fiancé it makes me scared cause all up to the point we got engaged I was fine and now I just feel like I’m going to hurt him or that I’m hiding a part of myself but I think that’s just the ocd because I was so happy before?
jag92jag92
- Date posted
- 3y
@Anonymous_1 Yeah! I’ve been on sertriline for 5 weeks and started some ERP and I feel sooo much better! I haven’t been giving into compulsions and I’ve been using the statements like oh maybe maybe not and ok ocd come with me to the shop or whatever and feel loads better like the thoughts don’t come as regularly …,I don’t know it’s it’s the sertriline I hope it’s the therapy too cause I’ll like to come off the meds next year
jag92jag92
- Date posted
- 3y
@Anonymous_1 Thankyou! How are you doing?
jag92jag92
- Date posted
- 3y
@Anonymous_1 Having a few bad days again :/ I had 4/5 days where I felt great and I even said to my therapist I’ll book one every other week instead of weekly but now I’m back to the awful feelings and depression ….I think the sertriline is taking the edge off a bit but maybe I haven’t done enough ERP …I did a couple in session and then a few on my own but I think a couple I did on my own were unintentionally reassuring if you get me cause there was bit where I was like oh I don’t do that that the lesbian does etc…..and I had few “ good times” with my partner and I felt so much better but now we haven’t had sex for a week and I feel rubbish again and anxious about it all ….he tried to snog me while I was making the dinner and I’ve had a long day at work and been overthinking again and I just snapped at him ☹️
danielwarwickdanielwarwick
- Date posted
- 3y
Hey! I’m a man and that happened to me too, I was really confused. Just like you said, it felt stronger than normal arousal. I’ve been dealing with it in therapy, I realize that my brain is obsessed with this idea that I’m gay, it puts all of its attention on it, and besides, it wants to alert me so I can protect myself from the threat. That’s why OCD feels so real and intense, your brain functions in a way that it’s “better safe than sorry”, so it will make you feel these feelings and make them feel really real and strong in order to make you protect yourself. You know what I mean? I couldn’t even see guys shirtless a few months ago, and now sometimes I don’t even care, because my brain realizes it’s not a threat anymore. I know it’s hard, but people really say that their arousals feel much stronger than normal arousal when they have intrusive thoughts. It’s really fucked up. But it’s a symptom of your brain trying to protect you, I know it’s crazy and really uncomfortable. But usually it tends to decrease its intensity with time, at least it happens to me. I’m still struggling with some stuff too, but overall the groinals are not as intense as before. Hope ot works. Best of wishes!
danielwarwickdanielwarwick
- Date posted
- 3y
@Anonymous_1 Hey! How you been doing? 😄
jag92jag92
- Date posted
- 3y
@danielwarwick How’s it going @danielwarwick?
jag92jag92
- Date posted
- 2y
@Anonymous_1 Same
jag92jag92
- Date posted
- 3y
It’s so hard isn’t it 😭😭😭I just had a panic attack I was reading stories about lesbians coming out and some of the things made sense so I starting crying and wanted to be sick!
jag92jag92
- Date posted
- 3y
@Anonymous_1 I do enjoy sex with him…we had quite a lot of sex at he beginning but now I’ve had a baby I’m not as much into it I think that’s just what happens well to me anyway which is why this has all come up again I think :/ I still enjoy sex when we have it and I do orgasm but I’m never one to initiate it ….I always want to hug and touch him etc but I’m never have a massive urge :/ and now I’m worried that I would have an urge if it was a woman but I don’t want that….maybe I just feel that cause it would be something new I don’t know
jag92jag92
- Date posted
- 3y
It kind of make sense what you’re saying though….I’ve never had the arousal towards men without the romantic …maybe that is normal?
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