What if I am just too afraid to admit I’m unhappy with my partner… 😭 What if we are better off apart?.. 💔 What if everything my brain told me was true… and I just don’t want it to be..? 😰 I am awake overthinking my relationship.. what if I am just afraid to start over when I still love my partner… What if I’ve been in denial this whole time…. What if my happy moments were lies… 💔
Try to keep it simple. Have them or don’t. There is no “right choice.” When we choose to be with someone, that’s exactly what we’re doing. CHOOSING to be with them. There is no such thing as finding the “correct” person to be with. If they treat you well, reciprocate your love, and are worth the inevitable work you will have to put in together, great. Comparing and contrasting feelings and thoughts will do nothing for either of you. It’ll just make you less present and more disoriented about the actual status of your relationship. Relationships, as with every aspect of life, feel different at different times under different circumstances. Hell sometimes things even feel different under the same circumstances. You, along with everything else in life is in constant motion, ebbing and flowing. The shifting is good because we aren’t stagnant, dead beings. We’re alive. Your relationship is alive. It’s not going to ever be a certain way for all time. If you start accepting that there is NOT some feeling or some experience that will confirm to you the rightness of ANY relationship once and for all, because there is no such experience, you’re gonna find out what you actually have here with them. Again, keep it simple. Choose them or don’t. You don’t have to “know” they’re “the right choice.” That just isn’t real. The truth is either of you could be compatible with literally millions of other people. You may be compatible with each other too. That has nothing to do with choosing to be with them or not. Just try your best to let go of searching for that final confirmation. You can stay and you will not find it. You can leave and you will not find it. Your choices will always be the same in every relationship for the rest of your life, choose to be with this person or choose to be without them. And remember that they get the same choices about you. If you do stay together you will have to continually choose each other. I reiterate, that’s what a relationship is. A choice to be with someone made every single day. As with all things OCD, there is not certainty at the end of this spiral. Only the fact of your agency and ability to choose. Choose what you value.
@Agent C He is worth it to me. I want to save the relationship but this feeling won’t stop… 😞 I don’t want my relationship to die… I want to save it so badly. I really do love him a lot. I really freaking do a lot. I’m so stressed out so badly…. 😢
@Agent C He does show love makes me yummy food and tries to cheer me up.
@7710 ❤️ Feelings are transient just like thoughts. We have to train ourselves not to put so much stock in them.
Yesterday I wrote crying saying I want the relationship back to normal again!! 😭😭 I know I don’t wanna break up!!! I want to love (partner) like before!!!
I know anxiety can be low key too… if I wasn’t having anxiety I wouldn’t be awake right now
Can’t be! What does it mean when there is no thoughts!?! I remember my good days!! I knew I loved him this can’t be the end!!!
I don’t even wanna have sex bc of how this has been feeling!
The biggest issue in the relationship is money problems… I have a spending problem and he has a very low paying job….
What if I really don’t like my partner? What if I’m gaslighting myself into thinking that my intuition could be OCD? What if we’re just not meant to be? I’m so confused
my thoughts are screaming at me telling me that i dont want my relationship anymore and that i realized i lost feelings. i have a beautiful relationship of two years with a beautiful boy that loves me dearly and i deal with this thoughs for a year and a half. Im so scared it feels so real im scared i have changed and my last therapy session made it worse she basically told me i have to realise the thoughts are true and stop lying to myself. And made me think i am so scared and heartbroken bc i put high expectations on myslef to be with my boyfriend for all my life. Maybe i dont want to hurt him??? im always questioning my feelings for him 24/7 for over a year. I wm tierd
Right now I feel like I’ve realized something awful. Like maybe… I never truly loved my boyfriend. Maybe in the beginning I was just excited to be in a relationship. Maybe I confused that excitement with real love. And when the intrusive thoughts started, maybe it wasn’t ROCD — maybe it was the truth hitting me. I write this and it feels real. That’s the scariest part. It feels calm and clear and like maybe I’ve just been lying to myself all along, holding on because I “should,” not because I truly want to. I can’t remember how it felt to love him — and that makes it worse. I feel so disconnected, so numb, like nothing makes sense anymore. Every time I try to feel something for him, it feels like I’m faking it. Like I’m playing a role, not being myself. But the thing is… I’m not at peace. If this was really the truth, why does it hurt so much? Why does this “realization” come with panic, guilt, emptiness, and so much fear? I don’t want to hurt him. I don’t want to lose him. But I also don’t want to keep living like this — doubting myself, my feelings, and my past. I feel like I’m stuck in a cycle I can’t break, and I’m scared I’ll always feel this way. Has anyone ever felt like this before?
Share your thoughts so the Community can respond
