What do I do when my HOCD makes me feel like I’m in denial and that I’m not romantically attracted to women, and the intrusive thoughts are there during these intrusive feelings? 😞😞😞
I find the best thing to do for me is to try and refocus back on the present moment. Do your best not to add meaning, read into, or argue with the thoughts. It’s definitely easier said than done but the more you practice the easier it gets.
@mjvl100 The intrusive feelings make it feel so difficult…
I’m the same.
You can hear the thoughts but you don't have to listen to them. When i'm in these kind of situations, non-engagement responses are the best for me. When i hear these thoughts, i allow them to speak for like couple minutes, feel the fear and anxiety and after couple minutes i say "yeah, OK, i may be gay or i may not be gay. I don't know and i don't care. So, goodbye!" you don't have to %100 believe it, just say it.
@zzyyxx What about the intrusive feelings…?
Hi! I struggled with this same thing for a long time. The best treatment I found was to think “what am I missing out on by focusing on my intrusive thoughts” every time I felt compelled to perform a compulsion. For me that played out like this “Am I gay?… Hmm let me check… Wait… What am I missing out on by worrying about this… I am missing out on connecting to the present and with my girlfriend… Let’s try to do that instead!” This only worked for me once I radically accepted that I have OCD and did it every time you have an intrusive thought! It feels so real when you’re going through it! You are strong and you’ve got this!
@paule150 It’s making it feel real though… 😞😞😞
@Givenup Uncertainty always feels bad with OCD! If this strategy doesn’t work for you don’t feel obligated to push it. You will know when you find a strategy that works with your OCD theme!
Anyone else will just be doing anything normal and I’m gay comes in? It’s so distressing and I try and say ok sure ocd but the anxiety over takes me and my mind won’t let me believe I’m straight when I am. I love men I’m Not attracted to women but when I ask myself the doubt is for sure there which sounds like Casebook ocd. I’m just sick of this I don’t want to have to laugh at things in my head that don’t make any sense it’s so hard and unfair
Ok so I’m a 17 year old female, and I’ve always thought I was straight. But I just really want to know how you would know the difference between so-ocd and actually questioning your sexuality. I have nothing against the LGBTQ community (in fact I am very much a token straight friend, lol) but I saw a video about comp-het recently and it sort of felt like what I was experiencing. I don’t want to be gay, I want to be with men, I want to like men, I’ve always liked men, but now I’m questioning whether or not that’s real? Because people can be gay but not want to be right? I’m single and I always have been. I think women are gorgeous, but when I try to imagine actually having any sort of romantic or sexual relationship with a woman it feels wrong, at least most of the time it does? Sometimes I’m less sure, and I’ve never been particularly boy crazy. I’ve liked maybe 2 or 3 people in my life, (not to say I’ve never found other guys attractive, but it doesn’t seem to be as often as most people) I have no particular reason to be afraid of being gay, very supportive family, safe area ect, but I don’t want to be, does that mean this is ocd, I don’t know what’s going on every time I say I’m straight I feel like I’m lying, but that might just be because I think about it so much. The idea of being with a woman doesn’t feel like something I would want, but is that just because I don’t want to want it? People online say things with so much sureness, if you feel like this it means this. Ect.
I’m sharing this bc I need advice or even support from anyone who can relate. If you can’t relate and don’t think you’ll say anything helpful or kind pls don’t comment anything… I’ve been struggling with somethings that’s making me question myself. There has been moments while self pleasuring when I get intrusive thoughts, in those moments it feels like I’m enjoying or even self pleasuring myself bc of the thought. Right after I immediately have an anxiety attack and my HEART drops bc it feels terrible I feel like a disgusting monster :( ppl have told me I haven’t done a bad bc of how intense my guilt and panic are but I keep thinking that MAYBE I made a horrible decision in the moment and the guilt is just realising that it’s just wrong this doesn’t make sense to me because I’ve always told myself that I would never act on this in 1 million years and I’ve been known that these things are wrong so I’m just like constantly questioning myself these feelings and exact same situation has happened two times already I even promised myself that I wouldn’t act on anything beforehand and yeah, I still felt like I did act on my thought during my alone time I’m genuinely convinced that I’m a horrible and it’s even got into the point where I don’t wanna be here anymore and I don’t even think this is my OCD :( tbh
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