[ Relationship ocd ]

I've been pretty bad about the relationship ocd, I know the fears of those who are going through it, and I still have my difficult moments, but now I want to advise those who are going through it! It's simple things I did, but that helped me a lot! 1- Talk to your partner. This is very important, even if you are not very intimate, it is necessary for the other to know that your behavior has a reason! Gradually explain your fears, and what ROCD is, at first it may be difficult for your partner to understand, but this is for the best of both parties. 2- Face your fears! It was one of the hardest things to do! But do you know everything that causes you anxiety? And what makes you create imaginary scenarios? I was afraid to talk to people and listen to music that gave me thoughts! Everything that you avoid, try to start doing, of course, little by little! 3- Compulsions. If your head says you need to do it one more time to be sure, be strong! And don't! Show your brain that you are in control! And try to do the things you avoid even having the thoughts! You need to be really strong to deal with anxiety, and it will feel really bad at first, but try it for yourself! 4- You don't need to confession. You don't have to tell your partner all your thoughts for this to give you temporary relief. Learn to separate what is really important, only tell if you really do something very wrong and that harms your partner. 5- Be kind to yourself. Learn that we all make mistakes, you don't have to condemn yourself for it! But don't think that just because it's okay to fail that you shouldn't try to improve. 6- You are in control of your actions. Things don't happen magically, there are mistakes that can be avoided, you just need to be aware, always think if it were the other way around, if it were your partner doing what you are thinking of doing, such as giving intimacy to other people, flirting with others people and make jokes about. This is not cool, take responsibility for your actions, because your partner is not obliged to forgive you. 7- Feel butterflies... Understand that it's normal not to feel totally attracted or in love with your partner all the time, and that's completely normal. There are times we feel more in love, there are times we miss our partner so much, and there are times we don't, and that's okay! That's it, I'll be answering comments if you have any questions, I'll try to help! Good luck 💗

Relationship OCD

99%ocd

Date posted: 2y

Even if someone else gave me butterflies is that okay 🥺

99%ocd

Date posted: 2y

A couple of my friends give me butterflies and this brings me so much guilt esp if I have dreams about them or someone else 🤕

manuh ⋆ ˚｡⋆

Date posted: 2y

butterflies are just a feeling of excitement and anxiety, it doesn't mean that you are in love with your friends, it's okay!

user74128588493

Date posted: 1y

@manuh ⋆ ˚｡⋆ i have hocd and am scared the butterflies are attraction… even to the friends of the same gender

Jessasmith28

Date posted: 19w

I have so much trauma in my life period and I have such bad anxiety I get real lonely at night and when me and bf of long distance aren’t on ft I start crying and have panic attacks, what do I do? I want to be better.

(_____)

Date posted: 14w

Thank you for this. I am really struggling, it’s nice knowing there’s people who have gotten through it.

vendel

Date posted: 25w

‼️I beat OCD. here are my best tips‼️

❤️we all just want it to be over already, but do not set a deadline for your recovery (e.g. "i give myself 3 months to get better") and let yourself go at your own pace ❤️accept that healing is a very, very non-linear process with highs and very dark lows.. it's a lifelong process for us those with ocd, when you stop suffering you start learning ! ❤️WITHOUT ruminating on this, identify the root of your obsessive themes. they hurt so much because they go after your deepest wounds. clearing out the fear or pain that stands at the base of your obsessions will help (e.g. my sexual ocd came as an emotional outlet for my inability to accept a new family member in my life) (e.g. my solipsism ocd came from the deep fear of being alone and abandoned) ❤️the truth will always surface. even if you have no hope anymore and not even asking for reassurance helps, put that last bit of your trust in the other people that are in good states of mind and who are trying to help you. remember that you're living by a distorted mind and if you can't trust your own brain, have trust in others. those who love you are your life net when you're down in the slumps. trust me. ❤️ocd can be caused by chemical imbalance. if you feel like you need it, don't be reluctant to try medication. it's important to have the correct dose and the correct meds. it may change a lot before finally being effective, but it can help A LOT. it was lifesaving for me. (I personally took 125 mg sertraline at 14 years old) ❤️cliche, but the exposure part of erp is in you already. we get exposed to relentless obsessions and terrors already by our minds, our part is the response prevention. throw yourself into the depths of uncertainty and fear by refusing to act upon your compulsions. any learned behavior can be unlearned, our brains are changing! 🧠 it does feel like we can't risk because we can't "know for sure" and we better be safe than sorry, right? well, screw this. unlearn these behavior and live life your own way. ❤️connect with other people with ocd. community is our pillar as humans, especially those communities who share our suffering. ❤️we tend to ask for reassurance a lot and other just reassure us because it's rational to them, not being aware thar it only causes us more pain as we have distoerted thinking. teach your loved ones to respond to your reassurance in a way that doesn't feed the cycle. (e.g. reassurance seeking- "hey, are you ABSOLUTELY SURE that I didn't hit an animal on the way back home??" ❌️wrong response- "no, you didn't, I already told you, I don't remember hearing or seeing anything!" ✅️better response- "I can see you are really distressed right now, why don't we go cook something together/watch a movie/paint together/etc.." ❤️keep your faith close to you. there is something bigger around us that surrounds us with love and takes care of us. even if you don't believe in a god, spirituality goes beyond religion. for me, this higher being was the sky, and everytime I saw the giant clouds I'd tell myself that they felt my emotions and they're watching over in my suffering. strangely enough, this pillar i built in the clouds was strong and really did give me a helping hand. who's to tell these connections we make are not real?

bubbsle

Date posted: 20w

Tips for Anxiety

Hey guys! My boyfriend has said recently that he doesn't know if he's strong enough to continue with our relationship because of my OCD. He wants to see me overcome my symptoms and learn to live a healthy life with OCD, but my anxieties and obsessions are starting to really affect his life. I understand his reasoning, it's hard to see someone you care about struggle with OCD, especially when it starts to affect you too. I'm asking for tips to deal with my compulsions in the relationship. I HAVE to know the answer to things and sometimes that leads into arguments because even with apologies and discussions I can't let things go, even if they genuinely don't matter or are miniscule issues we have. It's a healthy relationship otherwise but I feel horrible because it's impacting him so negatively, that's the absolute last thing I want to happen. I care for him deeply and he cares for me too, so I don't want my OCD to be a reason we break up but I fear it's headed in that direction. I'm starting therapy soon, but until then what are some things I can do to stop my ROCD from impacting him? I know sitting in the guilt and anxiety of not completing my obsessions will help, but I'm wondering if there are other things I can do to maybe remedy some of the damage already done.

anonn

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 11w

Managing ROCD/SOOCD with a partner

Hi all! I was wondering if anyone being treated with ROCD and/or SOOCD has some advice on how they handle the things *with* their partner. For context, my ex and I were together ~7 months before we broke up a year ago, in large part due to my severe anxiety from untreated ROCD/SOOCD. I’ve gotten a lot better through NOCD treatment and we’ve been friends since then. But we’re currently in a “situationship” kind of stage, where I think we’re both trying to figure out if the relationship is still feasible, and I’m finding that I’m a lot more triggered as the relationship nears becoming “serious” again. We’re both really trying to figure out the healthiest way to handle when things get hard for me. Does anyone have input about what they’ve learned or found what has worked in their own relationships? Some specific questions: - I’ve found that when getting really triggered in my own head, I have no clue if I should explain how I’m feeling to my partner or how we should address it together. How do you differentiate between communicating versus falling into the confessing/reassurance trap? - Related to the above, my partner and I are both a bit lost on the best way for him to respond when I’m really paranoid (for examples, I have major I’m-being-cheated-on paranoia and overanalyze if I’m enjoying sex enough), or if I’m overreacting to feeling rejected/misunderstood (e.g. “he didn’t respond to my comment just now, he doesn’t care/he doesn’t get me/maybe we shouldn’t be together…”) - How much does your partner know about ROCD/SOOCD in general? How much have you shared with them about your thoughts and experiences? I’ve explained both subtypes and some of my thought processes to him, but definitely not all of it, and I’m not sure how much is helpful for him to know. Answers to any or all of the questions are very much appreciated. Thanks so much in advance! Hope you’re all well 💗

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