Rayma15
- Date posted
- 2y
Contamination OCD
I'm hating my life and the fact that I'm always unconfortable in my parents' house. I hate the fact that I am not normal like anybody else. I just want to live in peace.
EstridEstrid
- Date posted
- 2y
Get you, you are not alone with tjis experience, I feel the same in my own home, its hard. Dont give up, search for therapy, you are normal but your amygdala is a bit hyperactive. With ERP it can learn to calm down.
Rayma15Rayma15
- Date posted
- 2y
Thank you. I'm living with my parents. I really want to leave the house but I can't currently. I'm also afraid that if I leave, I can't return even to see themđ˘ my whole anxiety is toward this house. I have a contamination OCD + an emotional contamination that makes is too hard to support
KillianKillian
- User type
- NOCD Alumni
- Date posted
- 2y
Iâm so sorry to hear youâre feeling this way. Itâs so hard to live with OCD, and I resonate with what youâre saying about wanting to live in peace. With ERP, the idea is to take it step by step. If touching something that you fear is contaminated gives you a panic attack, you would probably start with something that is less distressing on a scale of 1-10. Eventually you can work your way up to higher exposures. I second Jeffreyâs encouragement, it really is so helpful to have a therapist to guide you through the process. It takes time, and unfortunately itâs not an overnight fix. But when we decide to go through with it, and stick with it, it really can make a huge difference. The most amazing part for me has been feeling like myself for the first time, and not letting OCD control me. Know that that hope exists for you, too. The hard work really pays off. I hope you feel the support you have in this community and know that we are right here alongside you even when it is hard!
Rayma15Rayma15
- Date posted
- 2y
Thank you so much
DutchgirlDutchgirl
- Date posted
- 2y
I have many contamination issues at my parentâs house and my own as wellâŚ.I hate it. Everyday is overwhelming. I am working through ERP but am really struggling with really difficult tasks. It is so frustrating when your home is supposed to be a sanctuary. I hope you find peace.
Rayma15Rayma15
- Date posted
- 2y
Thank you so much
weallgotthisweallgotthis
- Date posted
- 2y
i totally relate to this and am working on the same thing but you got this!! we all believe in you :) baby steps!
Rayma15Rayma15
- Date posted
- 2y
It's heartwarming to hear that. Thank you
Jeffrey Jeffrey
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 2y
Ocd is a difficult disorder. As you know it attacks what means the most to us. Have you had ERP treatment ?
Rayma15Rayma15
- Date posted
- 2y
Yes, it hurts so much. The problem is that I can't even hug people that I love and I can't live with them normally either. I didn't do ERP therapy but I tried in the beginning to do it. Touching contaminated things give me strong panic attacks
Jeffrey Jeffrey
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 2y
@Rayma15 I am so sorry this is invading your life. If you have the opportunity to work with an ocd trained therapist they would be able to help you with all of these fears. I will say this - OCD is lying to you. It is sending false alarms to your brain saying there is danger when in reality there is likely no danger at all. Ocd looks for 100% certainty that nothing bad will happen - and that is not only unrealistic it is impossible. If you are unable to get therapy you could go to you tube where there are lots if helpful videos.
Rayma15Rayma15
- Date posted
- 2y
@Jeffrey Thank you. I want to enjoy life and love, be happy but I can't no one will support me as I'm dealing with this disease. I feel like I'm causing pain to people I love but it's really not me
Related posts
bun <3
- Date posted
- 24w
everything around me feels contaminated :((
sorry this is super long i just wanna know if anyone else has been thru something similar bc i feel super alone 𩷠i have super bad contamination ocd. it was bad already but my house was like my safe space until a few months ago someone brought something into my house that i considered âcontaminatedâ. and so then i felt like that part of the house was contaminated, then it spread to everything outside my room (since family is moving around touching stuff) and then somehow i got convinced everything in my room except my bed is contaminated and i need to wash my hands after touching it. in my mind its like the contamination just infinitely spreads to things after the tiniest bit of touch. idek what im afraid of anymore or even what the original thing was but i canât let it go. when i have to wash off contamination i have to wash at least 4 times or until it feels right, or sometimes take rlly long showers and wipe down all my stuff. i even throw away food and clothes or just whole items sometimes because they feel so contaminated i donât want them in my space. i canât be super near people or have anyone touch me, and i also canât bring anything new into my room since it had to go through the entry of my house which feels contaminated. i feel like all i do is lay in bed and then wash my hands and do compulsions so i can go eat or do other stuff around the house. also i never go out because iâm bc people outside make me feel dirty, and i hate thinking about how many people have touched stuff in stores or in public and stuff. so im just in my room worrying all day. i feel so trapped and the contamination/avoiding it is all i think about anymore i barely have time for anything else and im never present when i talk to people because im worrying about if i accidentally got contaminated. im starting erp next week and knowing that im going to have to expose myself to things is really freaking me out. does anyone else have this kind of ocd ? im exhaustedddd đĽ˛đĽ˛đ
flowerpetals
- Date posted
- 18w
spiraling over anxiety
contamination ocd has really been messing with me the last couple of days. usually i only struggle when i can connect something to possibly throwing up, but this time it doesnât matter. so earlier, i took a shower and i also use a wash cloth to wash my body. after i showered i cleaned up my dirty clothes and towels. then when i came back to grab my phone, there was a soap speck on my phone so without thinking i just wiped it on the back of my crewneck i was wearing. well that then spiraled into me thinking what if the soap was from my dirty wash cloth. i know most of you are probably thinking itâs clean since you use soap to clean ur body. well i clean every inch of my body, including my bottom so thatâs where my anxiety is gravitating towards. this sounds so ridiculous saying it out loud, but i just have so much anxiety over it. i tried my hardest not to change but i did. at first i just changed my crewneck, but then i had to change my shorts cause my crewneck touches my shorts. but then i changed my shorts. and now i feel like my shirt is contaminated cause i was wearing it with my other shorts before changing. moral of the story, i just have so much anxiety over it and i feel like i shouldnât because itâs really not a big deal. and i donât want to change again because that seems ridiculous to me. plus now iâm connecting the contamination to my bed since i was laying on my bed before i changed. i hate life, this sucks.
bboogg
- Date posted
- 17w
contamination ocd
i havenât left my house in a whole month because of contamination OCD and itâs extremely isolating i donât know what to do anymore i just want to be able to be happy again i feel so alone i just wish i never had this at all sometimes i just think to myself and say why me why me
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