- Date posted
- 2y
False memories
People with this theme how long did you guys have it for??
People with this theme how long did you guys have it for??
7 months, and it went away for about 3 weeks, now I have what I hope is only another false memory that seems worse than the one before.
@Miserable Ugh ☹️ that’s so long I’m sorry. I have this one that’s pretty bad for two months. I want it gone. How did you handle it? Did it feel like you needed to confess alot ?
I confessed everyday. Literally every single day. I seeked reassurance everyday. That false memory finally went away, and was instantly replaced with this new thought, which is absolutely horrible.
@Miserable I’m here if you want to vent. We’re yours vivid? Like details and your able to connect the “memories”?
Everytime I replayed the memory over and over again, it was so vivid and detailed I just knew it happened, and couldn't convince myself otherwise. It literally turned into a real memory for me.
@Miserable Yeah the same thing is happening to me 😭😭 it’s awful I tried to find other people and they didn’t get what I was trying to say and I started freaking out thinking it was real and I was just in denial.
@Miserable holy hell has this been happening to me, I got a full on spike when getting the "memory" the same way I got a spike with my real event. After that I've just gotten my mind telling me that I've done these things and there is no hint of me not doing it. No it feels and looks like I did ! Even saying its a false memory feels like me lying and trying to run away from it :/ Does your mind really convince you like that ?
@InkJoy123 Yes it does! I literally believe my mind over anything. Like I ask for reassurance constantly just in different ways but trying to get a different answer, when in reality I keep getting the same answer because it's the truth and I don't want to accept it because my mind is like they are lying and what I remember is true, but even if they gave me a different answer I would still flip out and question it. It's so draining.
@Miserable its just so tough, it also sucks cause this realness feeling feels different from past ones ive had, so it gets me so confused since this one feels i guess makes more sense then how it was before :/
@InkJoy123 Yes I feel like I should turn myself in.
@Miserable Same :(
Yes that's how I feel also! I keep asking for reassurance when it is just feeding my sickness. It doesn't matter what I am told, I am not satisfied with any answer I get.
@Miserable ☹️ same here I kinda got reassurance and I still didn’t care. It made memories around that. I hate it. It’s so tiring. Are you in therapy? Or doing erp?
I'm in therapy but haven't started erp yet. Do you still seek reassurance after getting answer? Like do you feel like no matter what they say, you are convinced otherwise that it indeed happened, but if they tell you another answer you still ain't satisfied and you question that answer?
@Miserable Yes. I question whether I could even trust them or if they’re lying. I even hate when people say to leave the past in the past. Because I want to know, I NEED to know. I don’t ever think I’ll have a for sure answer and that makes me mad.
This is me!!! Everybody is like you ain't satisfied with any answer you get! I'm like because they are telling me it didn't happen but in my mind it did and I remember it, drives me nuts.
I know I was here earlier on with a question as well lol but has anyone ever found that when a new false memory takes its place at the forefront of your mind, it's almost easier to disregard the old false memories and say "Yeah that stuff didn't actually happen that way". It feels like OCD giving you a little reward for letting it place a new, shinier false memory in your head. Anyone experience the same thing? Maybe I've asked a similar question before.
Hello all, I’ve dealt with various OCD themes and compulsions for pretty much as long as I can remember. In some periods of my life the thoughts and compulsions have been particularly severe, but I’ve also had years where I’m able to keep it under control. This has made me worry I don’t actually have OCD, especially because I haven’t been doing consistent therapy and my therapists have gone back and forth on whether I have OCD. In the past few years, I’ve struggled immensely with false memory ocd, and right now I’m going through probably the most severe episode of my life. I love my boyfriend with all my heart. A few times that I’ve gone out drinking I’ve had the thought before “what if I lost control and cheated tonight” and it’s bothered me severely. Two times before, it’s gotten to the point of convincing myself that because I talked to a man that meant I had cheated on my boyfriend and just couldn’t remember. It has never turned out to be true. About a month ago, I went out with friends and had too much to drink. I was really ashamed of myself the next morning, particularly because I always try to drink cautiously now that I know it can trigger my anxiety. I am ashamed to admit I do not remember the very end of the night getting in my uber and going home. I woke up anxious and extremely worried and immediately started off by worrying if I could have tried to kiss my friend and not remembered. I called him and was immediately reassured nothing had happened, I simply drank too much and went home at the end of the night. I started feeling better, but then remembered a moment I had been in the bathroom. I remembered chatting with people in line about how long the line was, and then being in the bathroom on my phone. I then felt like I remembered people knocking and saying to myself “that wasn’t that long” and leaving. There is nothing concrete that I remember that in any way indicates I cheated, and in fact I have texts with my boyfriend from the whole night telling him I loved him. My friend told me that the only time I was ever apart from him was about 5 minutes and that when he came back I was in the same exact spot he left me in. However, when I remembered being in the bathroom, I thought to myself “what if you cheated on him in the bathroom”/ “oh my god did you cheat on him in the bathroom” and then a series of images of me performing sexual acts popped into my head. I’ve poured over my memory and truly do not remember meeting anyone, talking to anyone, or even finding anyone attractive that night, but the fact that I was drinking makes me worried I’m just forgetting and these images could be real. I’ve been constantly ruminating on these fears for the past month, to the point that the only relief I feel is when I’m able to fall asleep. I’m a law student and it’s becoming extremely difficult to keep up with my classes. I’ve been google searching, asked chat gpt for advice, confessed my fears to my boyfriend, asked for reassurance from pretty much everyone in my life, and even emailed the bar asking for security footage (which I know all sounds insane). I’m a naturally guilty person and feel bad about small things, so I really don’t think I would be capable of cheating and then nonchalantly texting my boyfriend, but these images feel so real that it’s terrifying. I’ve also seen a lot about how I would “just know” and that begins to scare me because then I think “you do just know, you did it” even though I really don’t think I did. I know these posts are not supposed to be for reassurance seeking, I’m just so exhausted and feeling really depressed. I’m wondering if anyone has experienced something similar and has any advice. I’m also wondering if images can feel more real the more you ruminate on them or if it’s a sign of memory. Thank you so much for listening.
Does anyone else’s false memory intrusive thoughts of what could have happened feel very, very real?
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