I’ve been having panic attacks daily this week, and don’t even want to ask my fiancé for support now because I still feel like my OCD, intrusive thoughts, etc are all indicative that I’m a bad person that doesn’t deserve sympathy, or help.
That's really good that you've realised the belief that OCD feeds on "I'm a bad person" Honestly the weirdest and best way to respond for me is "Thanks" Thanking your ocd puts you in a place of Non-resistance. Just like someone that's picking a fight. It doesn't work if you just agree with everything they say. It might seem counter-intuitive but see if symptoms are going away after a week of doing this.
Love what Todd James said about saying, Thanks... using non-engagement responses can really help us with those intrusive thoughts that scare us or make us feel bad... Ok, brain... thank you. Or heres my OCD. Or so glad your here lets have a lovely day together... And then just move on with being present. I am sorry that you are having panic attacks. They really suck. What is your body trying to tell you? Are you avoiding asking for support? Are you ruminating on the panic and then it is bringing on more panic? What does it mean if you are a bad person... is that the root or is there something under that that needs acceptance? What can you do for self care to release some stress? Remember to have some compassion for yourself and what you are going through. OCD is hard, but you are stronger!
@littlebird Thank you for sharing what you are going through. I am sorry to hear you are struggling. Try to remember that thoughts are just thoughts not facts; and they do not define who you are. If you try to just push these thoughts out of your head, they probably will just increase. Instead try to let yourself just sit with the thoughts without engaging with them. I love Todd’s suggestion of responding to the thoughts with “thanks”. I think that is a great way of acknowledging the thought without engaging with it. Are you in therapy with a trained OCD therapist or NOCD? ERP (Exposure Response Prevention) therapy is a treatment method for OCD. It has been a very helpful tool for me with addressing my OCD. It’s helped me to gain tools to deal with my thoughts and obsessions. If not in therapy, please consider reaching out to NOCD care team for a free consultation.
@Lisa LeeLou I am in therapy with a NOCD therapist! That’s been helping a lot.
Thank you for sharing. I know it can be so difficult to ask for help- but please know that we all need support and help. We don't always have to be the strong ones. It is not a sign of weakness. I am hearing this a lot lately, people with OCD, feeling that they are bad or they should be punished. This breaks my heart. This is an illness- not a choice- not a moral problem- you have an illness. Please, please treat yourself with kindness and love, and grace. You are deserving of love and kindness.
That’s great!
I'd recommend Awaken Into Love on YouTube, for ROCD it helps tremendously. That and ERP , of course.
This is just kind of a rant but any encouragement would be so much appreciated, thank you ❤️ I’ve been with my boyfriend for 3 years. He is incredible, kind, funny, smart, hardworking, so so loving-just an extremely good person. In 2021 I developed or at least recognized my OCD. I’ve been diagnosed with OCD, anxiety and depression, definitely quite the list. Each of these conditions mingle with each other and make life very difficult at times. At the beginning it centered around me being a bad person but slowly grew to be relationship OCD. I have fears that I don’t really love him, I’m not actually attracted to him, I’m going to cheat on him, he doesn’t make me happy or that he would be better without me and is a better person than me. Lately I have this fear that one day not to far away he will prepose to me and I won’t be excited. Or that he will feel more for me then I do for him, or that I will have to fake my excitement. I have this vision of myself feeling nothing when he asks me and having to fake it. It’s just such a sickening thought to imagine not feeling the intense joy I always knew I would feel if he proposed to me. It’s so strange because before I had bad OCD I used to dream of that day, I would ask if he thought he might prepose to me one day and if his answer wasn’t certain enough I would feel very sad. It’s terrible because I’ll get depressed and feel nothing positive for any aspect of the world-including my relationship, but OCD will take that and twist it into me not feeling anything positive for him. Which will in turn make me feel more depressed. You ever just want to hide and pause the world for a little while so you can catch your breath? It feels like the weeks go by so slowly but still suddenly I’m nearly grown up.
These past couple days, Ive had 2 huge panic attacks in a row. I’m getting worried because they were kind of the worst theyve ever been. I couldn’t function at all and if my partner weren’t with me, I’m afraid I wouldnt have been able to move or get up. I was convulsing and couldnt stop having the worst intrusive thoughts. I was so disappointed in myself that I started having super intense suicidal thoughts and couldn’t speak. I really hate ocd. I ruined some of the most fun days that were planned out in a trip too. Idk what to do anymore
Went down the rabbit hole this morning after I got off a call with my nurse practitioner. We decided to up my fluvoxemine and change from Zyprexa to Abilify because my intrusive thoughts and depression seem to have worsened. For whatever reason after I got off the call, panic set in maybe about changing meds or upping my dosage. My mind was racing and I couldn’t calm down. I probably said “kill myself” and “I don’t want to kill myself” a hundred times. I haven’t had a panic attack in a few weeks and this one was bad. I’m finally calmed down but still having the intrusive thoughts. What have I done to deserve this. I can’t take it anymore.
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