been feeling good no anxiety but yesterday i was thinking about when my therapy appointment will come through and the reason why i'm starting it and now i'm anxious about it and the thing that's troubling me 😣
I’m so sorry to hear your getting some anxiety surrounding why you are starting therapy. It can be very daunting at first to start with a new therapist but it is 100% worth it! It’s never easy opening up right away but it can be so beneficial to your mental health and OCD recovery. You can always reach out to your Member Advisors if you have any specific questions regarding therapy! Best of luck!
Thank you for sharing what you are going through. I think it’s great that you are starting therapy. Please try to keep in mind that OCD is the doubting disease. Therefore, it is not surprising that as you are addressing your OCD, intrusive thoughts and questions are going to come up. Try to just acknowledge the thoughts, but not engage with them. Recovery from OCD is possible. Therapy, time, and patience show us how to manage the symptoms and keep the frequency and intensity of the episodes under control. Be patient with yourself, you are doing a great job.
Hey! I would definitely mention this to your therapist . They will go slow with you and make you feel comfortable. Therapy is hard. I was so nervous when I first went but it was so worth it. You got this!
thanks everyone i'm hoping my appointment will come through soon and can get my recovery process started
my therapist suggested that some of my less bad rocd intrusive thoughts are actually mine, and not intrusive. She ended up taking it back when she saw the alarm on my face and saw how panicked I got. I feel really freaking anxious. We were only talking about it because I mentioned a lot of doubt surrounding those less bad ones, but it only filled me with more doubt. I don’t want those thoughts to be mine. I really don’t. I feel scared and so discouraged after this session. I feel scared about the worst thoughts, what if those aren’t intrusive. I feel so much doubt.
These past few days I was fine. Minimal intrusive thoughts ,no anxiety etc(to add I'm on medication so maybe it's starting to work although it barely is 2 weeks) and today I got a sudden wave of anxiety and it started latching on some thoughts like" what if I'm in denial and I wanna break up with my bf? And what if erp doesn't work for me because I actually wanna break up with my bf?" But they didn't really stay long usually those thoughts would make me spiral for days or so, now they lasted for some hours. And now I'm trying to trigger myself into being anxious again because if I don't it means I don't have ocd and if I don't have ocd it means I don't love my bf and if I don't love my bf it means I have to break up. Idk if it makes sense but the lack of anxiety makes me wonder if I actually have ocd or not.
So i have an appointment with a doctor in 2 days, but im terrified of taking medication for anxiety, i tried it twice at 15 and would immediately stop taking them after a week or 2 because I was so scared of the side effects, then I tried fluoxetine at 18 and it gave me such bad anxiety with even the first 2 pills that I stopped that as well, now I'm 25 and im willing to try again and stick to it but my mind keeps bringing up all the reasons why I shouldn't and that it could make me worse, make me manic, make me numb, change me etc. Any help or advice welcome
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