decision making and conflicting thoughts

this is my first time using this app. i havent been officially diagnosed with ocd but the signs seem pretty clear. i've noticed myself being more anxious lately. a major issue ive been having is i am extreme indecisive. its dinner time, chicken tenders or a burger? sometimes it take me more time to decide on something than to eat it. maybe because i wanna make the best decision i can. and thats just one example. in the same ballpark, i can never have a thought that doesnt come with a conflicting thought. usually when i feel like i've negatively affected another person. i guess an example is like if i have plans to do something with a friend that i dont really want to do, i'll cancel. but then im like "what if going to that event meant a lot to them? did i make them cry? was that rude of me? should i go anyways and suck it up to not hurt them? i should respect my choices more. is that selfish?" you get the point. it then sends me into a spiral which often leads to anxiety or me crying. its all very tiring and i was wondering if anyone else has had similar experiences.

Username: blaze19starblaze19star

Date posted: 1y ago

I have had extreme indecisiveness, i read somewhere that people with ocd often have this and that it’s sort of apart of the “mindset” of ocd where you’re always overthinking. I think decision making is a learnt skill and when choosing dinner u should try to just pick one of the options, doesn’t matter which one if your struggling to choose and then try not to ruminate on if it was the wrong decision, just say idk maybe i’m just gonna go with this and move on. I try to do the same w decisions like that where they don’t really matter and i’m just being indecisive. I think the second thing where youre over thinking your choice is rumination. You’re trying to figure out wether it was the right/ wrong decision when it’s actually best to just leave it be and say “hey this is what i choose to do, i’m not gonna over think it”

Username: blaze19starblaze19star

Date posted: 1y ago

@Roccoxx555 remember rumination is a compulsion and will only feed ocd

Username: NoahDrehmelNoahDrehmel

Date posted: 1y ago

Wow, I also have this! I too am starting to believe I have OCD after thinking for so long it was just “anxiety”. But yes, I struggle with this too. I related a lot to your comment about canceling with a friend, I debate to myself also, “is this me being independent and deciding what I want to do (by cancelling), or is this me being selfish by not following through”, and then I overanalyze it trying to figure out if the scale of evidence (all the factors of the situation) tips more to the decision I made, but ultimately wondering and ruminating if I made the “right” choice, and then never feeling content that I did. You are not alone :)

Username: kiwi01kiwi01

Date posted: 1y ago

@NoahDrehmel yes! its so comforting knowing im not the only one who goes through that

Username: DevuDevu

User type: NOCD Alumni

Date posted: 1y ago

Honestly the diagnosis can help but any OCD like behaviors can be tackled by ERP and the like. I commend you for taking charge of your mental health!

Username: Anonymous

Date posted: 3y ago

I hate how my mind is making me doubt of my intentions when i clearly know that I don’t have any desires to act on my thoughts. It makes my intentions feel so uncertain, and sometimes it would even make me feel like if I wanted to act on my thoughts when I actually don’t, because I wouldn’t be doubting if I did. So since I feel my intentions so uncertain I need to come to an answer, and sometimes it is so damn hard to get that answer, which makes me anxious and disturbed. It would also make me think of my past like, how were you okay without having these thoughts? Or makes me think of my future like, will you be okay without these thoughts? So it would make me think that these thoughts are really desires and I won’t be okay unless I act on them. As horrible as it sounds. And I don’t know if someone gets this too but, it would also make me doubt my feelings. When my family tells me cute things like “I love you” and stuff, I would feel so bad, because my thoughts are towards them. So I would say “ily too” but I feel like an hypocrite saying it, or like I don’t mean it at all, so it makes me doubt if I really love them or not. This is all so overwhelming, and I have gone through so many disturbing and crazy thoughts, feelings and situations, that I don’t know if this might be OCD.

Harm OCD

Username: monica<3

Date posted: 22w ago

ocd is controlling my life

hey everyone. i’m not sure if this app will help me or not, but i feel the need to try anything because i can’t keep living like this. i struggle with obsessing over everything in my life. it feels like everyday my brain picks a new thing in my life to obsess over. for the past couple days ive been obsessing over my interpersonal relationships. for example; “do i like the people im with” “do i like my friends as more than just friends” “do i actually love these people or am i lying to everyone”. it’s been really messing with me and making me question my support system. i can’t stop stressing. i’m even afraid to talk about it with my therapist because i have those thoughts about her too. i’m new to my OCD diagnosis (got diagnosed last month) i was hospitalized for a week because i couldn’t function. i also obsess over my sexuality and nothing i pick for me ever feels quite right. i recently started a relationship with someone who’s trans, so maybe that’s why? does anyone else go through this? my brain tries to convince me that i do this to myself and that im making it all up. but who would want to feel this way? uggghhh

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decision making and conflicting thoughts

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