My ocd serial killer harm thoughts // Schizophrenia fears are hitting the past few days and I totally fell for 2 compulsions. While I do feel stronger in dealing with it. The discomfort is still the same. Any words of encouragement?
Compulsions can be tricky. Be gentle on yourself when you accidentally give into compulsions. It’s so important that you recognized them. The discomfort will take time to reduce, especially when we still are falling for compulsions sometimes. This keeps us locked in the cycle. Even after recovery, sometimes things that haven’t bothered me for months will creep back up and give me anxiety the same way it used to. I just try avoid compulsions and sit with the anxiety. I recognize that through recovery that I required coping skills to deal with these so even when they may come up, they won’t last as long. Durability is the biggest key. Noticing that anxiety that may have bothered you for weeks on end should start to only last a few days or sometimes come up.
Sorry it’s been tough the past few days. I second what Jesse said, ERP takes patience and self-compassion in addition to resisting compulsions. Practice over perfection! Every time our obsessions/fears arise is an opportunity to take a pause and practice our ERP skills. Sometimes the discomfort lingers, the important thing is that we’re not trying to make it go away, but instead just letting it be there so that our brain eventually learns that we can handle it. You’ve got this! ✨
Do you think you may have schizophrenia too?
Not actually but yeah I have a fear of developing it.
Hello..so I stopped doing compulsions and my harm ocd has gotten weaker but it I’m sure switched to a new ocd but I don’t have any physical compulsions to do, however I’m pretty sure I’ve been doing mental compulsions which in my opinion is harder to deal with than physical. Any tips? Sending love and strength to us all ocd is a nightmare to deal with I can’t wait to live my life again without this bully inside my head
It’s amazing how powerful OCD is, I went through the worst Mental Health experience of my entire life last year. I thought my life was over, that I was insane, and was convinced 100% I had schizophrenia. My brain was mimicking every symptom. It was terrifying. After starting OCD therapy and ERP. My life changed forever. I was actually mental stable for once. I felt happy and controlled for once. Now Schiz OCD is back , and it seems worse then before. I can’t sleep, eat, work, or even socialize. I constantly feel insane. My two biggest themes are Harm OCD and Schiz OCD. And these themes work together to cause me constant anxiety. It’s hell. I can’t even think straight. I’m currently dealing with DP/DR, command thoughts/voice, internal voices/thoughts that I can make not sound like me or my inner monologue, “What if” delusional thoughts,hyperviligance,checking if I hear or see anything externally(auditory and visual hallucinations) and many more. I question my insight constantly. I even went to the hospital the other day to get evaluated and make sure I don’t have psychosis. Everything I fear the most seems to be coming true. Constantly asking my parents and therapist/professionals if I have schizophrenia. Constantly looking for reassurance. Feels as if I’m thinking my way into psychosis and schizophrenia. OCD knows exactly what you fear and will try to one up you on anything. OCD will CONVINCE you everything that’s happening to you is true , all your biggest fears. OCD is trying to find new things to keep you stuck and hold you in fear. This experience has been horrible and I am convinced I’m going insane. But I’ve been through this once and I’m going to get through this again. STAY STRONG. Reach out to professionals, Resist compulsions, step into the fear, and relax a little bit. You’re not alone.
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