Does anyone with rocd have their feelings manifest to anger? Like every little thing my wife does, that I don’t 100% agree with, is a huge deal. God forbid its something important, it’s like the worlds coming to an end. I can logically tell that these feelings are not warranted but to get the feelings to follow suite is a whole different story.
I do, this is something that has developed fairly recently for me but it has been one of my main focuses lately. That and stress. When did this start for you?
It comes in waves. Feels like when I’m spiraling down (in terms of my intrusive thoughts and anxiety), the anger seems to be more prevalent.
I get that completely. I feel like a pit that constantly ready to boil over with the slightest trigger because of the constant doubt, inner conflict and agonizing pain and anxiety which leads me to get so overwhelming frustrated with the the way I feel and ultimately, myself. My parter seems like the source of this feeling as opposed to it coming from something inside of me so it's hard not to feel some resentment even if it is unwarranted. Would you say that's pretty much what you're going through?
@JLG323 That is pretty damn close. I never really tried to figure out where it came from or why it’s there. I just always chalk it up to me being bat shit crazy.
How long have you been going through rocd man?
@JLG323 Since I was a teenager, I’m 35 now
If I may, is it hard for you to buy that what you go through is rocd and not the truth?
@JLG323 Absolutely, the doubt is always there. I have been formally diagnosed by numerous psychiatrists and psychologists and still doubt the diagnosis. That in itself is part of the ocd bull shit.
For me that is the single most difficult part of it. It's been a little more then 4 years for me but I've gone through it through two different relationships. I'm almost 29 now. How long have you been with your partner?
We have been together about 12 and married 8.
That must be really hard man. Has it gotten any easier?
@JLG323 I have more than my fair share of bad days but whatcha gonna do… I feel it has gotten a little easier over time to somewhat coexist with the thoughts. I’m having a bad stent currently. Like we were talking about, my mind is playing the what if game. What if this isn’t ocd, what if I really dont love her, etc. Shit sucks man.
It really does man, I'm sure you've heard this a million times but have you ever given ERP's an honest effort?
@JLG323 I have and it does help to a point. It’s really difficult for me to apply consistently. I work FT at a cancer center, I have my wife and 2 kids. It’s really hard to apply those tools when my attention is pulled in so many directions.
I get that dude, I also work full time and have two kids. I know how hard it is and I imagine you feel just as stressed, anxious, overwhelmed and depressed as I do. If this is OCD we go through then I can't halp but think that ERP'S are our best shot at this point. Unfortunately they're just as hard as going theough it every day. Even harder as a matter of fact. It may be our only real chance though man.
@JLG323 I agree with you. One of hardest parts is putting yourself and your needs before everyone else’s.
Hi everyone. I’m having a really hard time today in my relationship. I am just feeling so frustrated by my back-and-forth feelings about my relationship. One day I’ll feel so good, and then the next I don’t at all. I think my biggest trigger in the house is the chores that the two of us have to do in the house. I’m much more of a clean person than my boyfriend is. I’m also thinking that he has ADHD and struggles to remember when to do specific chores and I have to remind him pretty often, but he will usually do it when I ask. Today, I’m on a huge spiral of telling myself that he is never gonna be able to learn to do things on his own, he’s not gonna be able to take care of our kids in the future If we do get married, he’s not gonna be able to help take care of our house when we do have one one day, And I am just exhausted. It’s so hard fighting these thoughts all day and then I feel like I have to sit down and talk to him about chores and obviously that doesn’t go well when I’m not feeling good. Definitely a compulsion… It feels so much better when I can just relax and just let him figure things out on his own, and I can just take care of myself. I also come from a household where I was constantly criticized and controlled in certain ways, so I have that to carry too…I’ve gotten much better at doing that most of the time but today is pretty bad. It always feels a little bit worse as well when I’m on my period and feeling very hormonal as well… Can anyone please shed some light on if they’ve experienced this before and any support they might be able to offer in relation to this? Anything would be helpful and please be kind!
I just saw my boyfriend, and even though everything was okay on the outside, inside my mind it was a storm. I kept having thoughts like: “You don’t like him.” “You’re not feeling anything.” “You’re pretending.” “You don’t care.” And then, he said something sweet — something that should’ve made me feel happy: “We should marry.” And instead of warmth, I felt anxiety. A pit in my stomach. A voice in my head saying: “You don’t want that.” “You’ll never stay with him.” “If you really loved him, you’d feel joy.” And I hate it. I hate that I’m in this state. I don’t feel connected. I don’t feel clarity. I don’t even know what I feel anymore. I just feel… numb. And the worst part? It feels like I don’t even care. But I know I do. Somewhere, beneath all the noise and panic and obsessive thoughts, I care. I want to feel close to him. I want to stop second-guessing every word, every touch, every thought. This is ROCD. It makes me question everything. It makes me feel like I’m lying — even when I’m not. It steals the moments that should feel warm and turns them into confusion. If anyone else feels this awful mix of numbness, fear, and guilt — please tell me I’m not alone.
Can ROCD make your thoughts and feelings feel 100% true or real???? Like I can have a thought or feeling and in that moment it feels real or should it not feel real until the ocd latches onto it?
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