No..

@Flower33 I feel completely detached…

@Flower33 I’m convinced I wanna break up..

@7710 ❤️ Im feeling the same way too, disconnected right now but just knwo that’s your ocd it can be so overpowering and negative that it makes you feel like that, makes you feel that your partner is a stranger (for me anyways), there are so many negative horrible thoughts getting in between you and not allowing you to see how amazing your partner is because you’re drowned in these horrible thoughts constantly

@7710 ❤️ I’ve had that too, made me think that I want to break up with my partner. But you said in your earlier post you know you love him a lot, and you haven’t mentioned any red flags or any flags for that matter so clearly it’s ocd. Have you tried exercising or Brain puzzles to get you out of your head and going out and doing something fun with your partner?

@Flower33 My partner and I are too broke to go out. We laugh together and watch movies in shows but I’m in debt so can’t really afford to spend money going out. My partner has been begging for hours at his job. I just miss the days where I can come home and just relax. That’s all I want to do. I love him a lot but never felt like this..

@7710 ❤️ This sounds like a really loving and lovely relationship, and it’s so clear that it’s ocd, it’s hard to tell when you’re in it. Don’t let ocd win and ruin an amazing thing that you have. I came across this really insightful site about ROCD and about love, see the link below, she also has lots of free YouTube videos as well xx https://www.awakenintolove.com

@Flower33 It is. Our relationship is a good one been together for 12 1/2 years I know when I didn’t obsess I was fine and am actually happy. I’m just scared that I actually don’t love him 💔

@Flower33 The thing is I get obsessed about our issues which we are working on. I’m scared deep down I know the truth. I know when I’m super happy I love him but I am doubting non stop about breaking up but I can’t do it bc there is something in me that stopping me… I don’t wanna do it. I’ve been dealing with ocd issues for years and never has it been this bad… 😞

@Flower33 Just scared that too much damage has been done 😞

@7710 ❤️ I’m at that stage now, everytime my bf does something wrong and it can be something so minor or he would say something as a joke my ocd would latch onto that and I would get so many horrible thoughts and I’m fighting it so much but it gets so overwhelming that I started to doubt and that really scared me, I keep telling myself to trust myself and I want to be with him, don’t let ocd win that’s what it wants to do. And the fact that you haven’t thrown in the towel means that deep down u don’t want to. My ocd is at its worse too and I think that’s due to engaging with the thoughts which reinforces it, the more you’re scared by the thoughts the stronger it will come. Are you speaking to a therapist about your ocd?

@Flower33 I am gonna talk to my doctor Friday morning hoping I can be put on medication and to help me find therapy. I gonna try to see if I can find a therapist that specializes in ocd issues. This is what I need to hear. I have been so scared that I was the only one going through it this badly..

@7710 ❤️ You’re not alone, so many of us are going through it. And I always like to think of it as, If a girl wakes up feeling pretty but then is told by countless people she’s ugly non stop all the time she’s going to start to believe it, but that’s not true. Just like ocd but worse because it’s literally 24/7 and has this way of intensifying these thoughts so much. Definitely look for someone who specialises in ocd, as there are so many therapists out there that don’t and will give you the wrong advice and might make it worse

@Flower33 I just hope it’s that.. bc right now I believe I don’t love him… I keep saying I don’t and get no reaction. 😞 I could’ve convinced myself that I don’t love him after 3 years of testing myself…

@Flower33 Scared I don’t really don’t love him…

@Flower33 There is always one thought that pops in my head when I say I don’t wanna break up. That I don’t wanna hurt him… 😞💔 that is the thought I can’t get over. I so freaking badly want you my partner and everyone else who told me this is ROCD to be right.. my happy moments are truth to that but I haven’t had a good 3 months non stop… I’ve never seen anyone go thru this non stop.

@7710 ❤️ I think there are multiple factors why you’re not getting any reaction, you’ve said it so many times now it no longer has an effect, when I say all the things to reassure myself and say it so many times it literally goes in one ear and out the other, it’s just random words to my brain and I think this is what you could be experiencing. Your brain could also be used to this thought now and just doesn’t find it scary anymore, just like when you expose urself to a scary thought or image, if you do it long enough your brain gets used to it and no longer thinks anything of it. On top your ocd is trying to convince u of this and it Just makes you so disconnected that when you think of your bf you feel numb and don’t feel anything. There are times when i think of my bf and I just feel absolutely nothing but I trust that it’s my ocd doing this to me after months of trying to convince me it makes me feel so out of touch in my relationship I feel nothing when I think of him

@7710 ❤️ I really do believe it’s ROCD as you exhibit all the signs of ROCD. I’ve been in mine for 8 months now non stop and trust me I know the feeling, it’s so heartbreaking and I feel so sad but I’m still Believing it’s my ocd because he’s so amazing and Despite my ocd he makes me happy and from what you tell me your partner sounds wonderful too, it’s Just ocd getting in the way

@Flower33 I wished…. I talked to you sooner.. this would have helped hearing this.. my partner is my baby even though I believe I wanna break up but my mind is damaged from the trauma… I am worried I have no choice…

@7710 ❤️ trust me i’m in the same place but trust him okay? if he’s good to you, let yourself be loved and let yourself love

@niñadelaluna I know I love him. But I can’t stop thinking about it. It honestly feels like I want this… 💔 My partner is truly afraid I am in denial and he has been feeling like he isn’t good enough when he is trying so hard to help me.

@niñadelaluna His confidence is lowered and even he is obsessing quietly about things worried about what I am constantly thinking about… 😞

@niñadelaluna He even tries to keep me off my phone… so I don’t look up stuff to make my head worse… When I am happy I don’t obsess at all… 😞 I do truly know around that time I love him. Everyday I fight this in hopes to get help… 😢 I am scared that I know the truth.. that I just don’t wanna admit it..

@Flower33 When I sit with it all I feel is wanting to break up…

@7710 ❤️ Ocd is so convincing, I can tell by the way you write about your partner that you love him dearly, if this was really what you wanted you wouldn’t feel this anxious and this saddened. You always have a choice, don’t let ocd defeat you. You need to take a step away from your brain, see it as separate from you and observe your thoughts impartially and then report what your ocd is telling you and say the emotions it’s giving you, once you’ve done a full report then say right I’m going to focus on something else now watch tv, play a board game, do the laundry. I just learnt this Today, give it a try! Xx

@7710 ❤️ I understand how you feel, the thoughts feel so real and it feels deep down you want it but that’s how powerful it is, all ocd sufferers go through this and you’re not the only person. Don’t allow it to dictate your life and ruin a good thing, accept that it’s ocd ❤️❤️❤️

@Flower33 I am gonna try my hardest not to freak out today. Dealing with the not right feelings. I keep feeling the I know deep down. What if’s pop into my brain… I am just getting nervous I’m lying to myself… 😞💔

@Flower33 It sucks bc my brain just nitpicks him. My partner doesn’t drive but he does work and helps pay for things. That matters to me a lot and he’s been bugging for a lot more hours at work which is paying off. But my brain nitpicks that he doesn’t drive and then I see a guy driving and my brain goes you want a guy that drives… which never bothered me until my ROCD got super bad. My partner is extremely afraid of driving which I understand completely so that’s why I don’t care if he does or not. He cleans cooks helps pay for food and random items we need, pays bills and our streaming services. Even takes care of the kitty chores. Since I go to work. He is a very good man doing that. I just wish my anxiety or obsessing could see what he is doing is good enough. We don’t live on our own and probably won’t for awhile which is fine. 😁

@Flower33 I worry bc on here someone said maybe you deserve better… I haven’t been able to let that go after either 😢

@Flower33 I am calm ish right now but still obsessing and analyzing my feelings and emotions. Does the calmness mean i found truth??

@7710 ❤️ My ocd is the same! It nitpicks at every single stupid thing, my bf would make fun of me as a joke and then my ocd will he’s insulting you, he’s the wrong guy for you, the other person is Better for you (my ocd trying to convince me that someone I dated in the past is better for me, makes me so sad). Also trying to convince me I want other men, random people I come across on the street and my ocd says oh yeah I’d get with him and it sounds like Its me saying it but then I know I don’t even fancy him! Your brain thinks these are the things we want so it’s now wired that way, it thinks our fears and worries are our wants and pleasures, because ocd has done a good job to convince it. I totally relate to the things you’re experiencing, it really is your ocd. Its going to get more powerful unless you accept it’s just a thought. I’m exactly the same, I didn’t have any issue before until now my ocd started saying these things so remember that. Also it makes it into such a big deal but it actually really isn’t. Yes always remember that he is a good person and I say that about my bf too is, he’s a good person now move on and then I bring myself back to being present in the moment. He sounds like an Amazing person and a good guy is really hard to find and sounds like you have something special there, don’t let ocd take that away from you xx

@7710 ❤️ It’s clear as day that you have ROCD, and that person doesn’t know your relationship to say those things. You guys laugh together and have fun together, get along and he is a supportive loving person, many people aren’t lucky to have that, thats special xx don’t listen to that person and it’s a silly thing for him/her to say

@7710 ❤️ Calmness doesn’t have to mean anything other than feeling calm, embrace this calm feeling, you’ve done a lot of analysing and your brain needs a break. Not every emotion has to mean something, especially with ocd xx

@Flower33 Do you worry that… you get bored? Like your partner talks about talking about something he is interested in and you hear a voice saying I’m bored but it’s not you that says it but then you start obsessing about it?

@7710 ❤️ I haven’t gotten to that stage yet of being worried that I’d get bored BUT When he is speaking sometimes my ocd says to me you find him boring don’t you and it will even be about general every day type stories like him telling me a story of our dog. I just remind myself that not all conversations are going to be super funny or interesting, it’s just updating each other on what’s happened that day and I remind myself that I also tell boring stories lol, this is what a typical relationship looks like. I also remind myself the my ocd is trying to convince me, trying to convince me he’s not the one and latching on to petty silly things, I also like to say to it to fuck off lol

@Flower33 I am trying so hard to sit with it. Thankfully I can get my medication today. But… I can’t stop feeling off… I wanna thank you for talking to me. It really helps. I am so scared it’s hard to think normally. Sometimes I even ask myself if this is ROCD anymore.. I still do compulsions and I realize it. It’s just scary.

@Flower33 hey i love your advice i’d appreciate it if u looked at my posts

@7710 ❤️ Trust me I’ve felt off so many times before but I know it’s Because ocd has overwhelmed and drained me in so many negative thoughts and me ruminating so much that it made me feel disconnected. It’s like imagine if your friend had constantly said to you how terrible your bf is and making you question every single thing, challenging every single thing you say for months on end non stop, you’re going to natural doubt and feel not so connected,having a dark cloud over you, of course you’re not going to feel present and emotionally there, you have all these horrible thoughts clouding your judgment, and ocd is worse than this “friend” as we all know it gets so extreme, so powerful, deep into rumination, 24/7 and intensifies it. Don’t worry I’ve had those same thoughts too, is it really ROCD but I have to put trust in myself that it is and I’d be a fool to let a good thing go, and like you said you were happy before this ROCD started so you know for a fact that it is that! Xx

@niñadelaluna Hi, aww that’s so sweet thank you. Sure thing, can you tag me and I’ll read and reply xx

@Flower33 it wouldn’t let me but i struggle wanting physical affection sometimes, like kissing and all. sometimes i feel like i want more and i don’t want her to have it all idk how to explain it. like if im little spoon and she wants to switch my ocd tells me i’m annoyed and everything then that announce triggers my “you don’t love her “ thoughts and it’s so fucking hard. me and my girlfriend we’re friends for years before we started to talk like that, before i even knew i was gay. and lately my ocd tried to make me think we’re better off that way but we became BEST friends in our relationship. we’ve gone through hell and back and found each other again after the worst and we grow so fucking much together. if it weren’t for her i’d probably still be a self harming self deprecating self destructive mess. she helped me see my worth and i have this fucked up standard i learnt when k was a kid that said ppl show u what u need to see and u needs let them go. that is the most selfish thing i have ever been taught. i love and adore her so much and i always choose her at the end of every spiral every argument bc i want us forever. i’m just so disconnected from my environment and my reality i can’t fully enjoy any moments of love, serenity, peace. when i do, i think my mind is just “giving in” and i’m “putting up a front to protect her” but she doesn’t need protection she is s strong valuable and honorable woman. idk how to connect with my reality and my senses because my ocd is letting all my past toxic traits come back as a form of habit and ritual. i don’t know how to let myself love. i used to be SO SO SO OBSESSED, i mistake it for being “in love” idk what “in love” even means anymore. i feel so wrong for all of this to hit me. it hit me after i kissed her and it hadn’t left since. it’s so fucking hard i feel so helpless idk how to snap back into it:(

@niñadelaluna All the things you’re thinking and feeling are typical signs of ocd, I experience this too. Before me and my bf would cuddle loads and a lot of the time now I just don’t have that eagerness to be close to him anymore whereas before I used to be glued to him, I used to want to kiss him every morning before I go to work but now I don’t, but I know it’s ocd. That’s what ocd does, it makes you feel detached, it overwhelms you with all these negative horrible thoughts about your partner that you just don’t feel present. I’m sure before your ocd and you had an actual real argument and then you go and see your friends and you just feel disconnected in that social setting because you have a lot on your mind, that’s just like ocd (which is worse) because it drowns you in these horrible thoughts and you just don’t feel yourself and disconnected, you have all these thoughts burdening you non stop and it’s alot. Even a week ago it was literally non stop and so intense and picking at every single thing my bf was doing that it got to The point that I cried because I couldn’t take these thoughts anymore, the thoughts were relentless, but what I do which has helped is just remind myself that he is a good person, respects me and treats me well and that’s how I know it’s my ocd too. I detach myself from my brain and observe my thoughts impartially, report (tell myself) this is what my ocd is trying to tell me, give a detailed report and how it’s making me feel and then tell myself right accept this as just a thought and move on and then bring myself back to the present again. You’re going to feel anxious at the beginning but then it’ll soon fade, your ocd wants this but YOU don’t want this. Yes my ocd is literally like a security camera, watching every move and latches onto it and says that’s not right, you’re annoyed, you should be with someone better, this is where you imagine your Brain as a separate thing and you observe your thoughts, it wants you to engage but don’t engage as it’ll make things worse. Accept the thought and move on. The best relationships starts off as friends! You know you already get along really well, that mutual respect and trust is already there and it developed into something amazing and you’re not just partners but Friends too, that’s special and not a lot of people have that, don’t let ocd take that away from you xx you’ve been tested by hardship and you’re still here together today and it shows how much she means to you, you didn’t want to let that go xx The more we’re scared by these thoughts the more they’ll come and they’ll get stronger, as hard as it is, you have to accept that it’s just a thought and say ok moving on now. Don’t let ocd rob you of your happiness. If you engage it’s going to take you away from your present moment, it will also reinforce your ocd too and it doesn’t care about logic so don’t even give it the time of day, don’t bother! Just accept that it’s just a thought, it’s ocd just trying to convince you, tell it to fuck off and then move on. Love is not a feeling! It’s an action, feelings come and go all the time. You wanting to make up with your gf after an argument means you love her, not these silly thoughts in your head When you are intimate, my therapist taught me that to get in touch with all my senses, listen to the sounds in the background, connect with how things feel, smell, that will get you out of your head! Also, try doing brain puzzles, or think about something exciting you guys can do, make plans, exercise as that’ll lift your spirits and get you to stop thinking, do fun things together like cook or Play games, the more you sit there and do nothing the more the thoughts will enter. Don’t let ocd make you feel like she’s not worthy, by the sounds of it she sounds a too great of a person to give up ❤️❤️❤️❤️

@Flower33 What if my ocd faded?!? I keep thinking I know I don’t love him as a compulsion but it’s so wired into my brain lately.. I don’t feel nothing… I believe I am lying…

@Flower33 you might have just saved me from myself. i was going to break up with her bc they felt so real, i try to force myself to t de butterflies by looking at our photos or thinking of them too much and then i don’t feel anything and it’s so hard. i used to see this whole future with her when i was super obsessed and now it scares me too, so much commitment issues. i’ll keep all of this in mind you truly just saved me from so many future breakdowns. they happen multiple times a day every day im always sobbing and hyperventilating. that groinal feeling and the unwanted arousal go other people and things make me feel horrible. i know it’s not me that’s when i feel like breaking up because i jus cant fucking feel. it’s so hard.

@niñadelaluna Everyone who has ocd always say it feels so real, mine feels real too but I know ocd focuses on it so much and intensifies these thoughts by a 1000 and even when you reassure yourself and do compulsions your Brain doesn’t even process it, it just sounds like random words to the brain. You can’t create emotions, it has to happen naturally, you can’t force these feelings. My mind also needs to be free and empty for any feelings to happen. Ocd can you really make you doubt yourself, that’s why it’s called the doubting disease, the future isn’t guaranteed, live in the present day and enjoy the moments. Don’t forget that no one is Perfect, she’s not and neither are you or I, don’t let your ocd condemn the person you love who is loving and supportive and a good person. I would recommend stop focusing so much of trying to feel something, because they more you try the more it’s not going to happen, take a deep breathe, relax and go with the flow. Maybe try some mindfulness meditation and being more self compassionate xx

@7710 ❤️ It hasn’t faded as you’ve been doing your compulsion, classic ocd to make you feel like you don’t have it, you’ve been obsessing so much that you’ve reinforced it and engrained in your Brain, that’s what happened to me too but it isn’t going to get better unless you stop doing your compulsions. Accept that it’s just a thought and move on, if it’s too hard then try to delay as long as possible, you got this I know you can do it! xx

@Flower33 okay i’ll try, this shit makes me feel like i don’t like hee face or some shit all the time. hee personality i rarely question but her appearance i do, i don’t know what to do. i’m a slave to my mind and idk why but every thought feel like they have meaning. some stupid shit like “the gut feeling when u fall out of love” it hurts so much. when i’m panicking i feel like i sound like a guy when they cheated and they’re love bombing and leading them on. ocd makes me feel like i’m leading her on it kills me idk what to do

@niñadelaluna I really recommend these sites who are really knowledgeable about ROCD and can relate and give really good advice, https://www.relationshipocd.com https://www.awakenintolove.com She has some free you tube sites too and on Instagram I also follow this person on Instagram https://instagram.com/ocdandanxietyonline?igshid=YmMyMTA2M2Y= ❤️❤️❤️

@Flower33 Started medication Zoloft for 2 days now. I feel normal… Kinda. I am at the point that I believe I don’t wanna be with him anymore…no feelings or anything at all…

@Flower33 I still show love but I don’t know the aftermath of rocd

@7710 ❤️ The Medication can take weeks until it kicks in, I think around 3 weeks until you feel the affects. Ocd can be so powerful, all ocd sufferers feel like their thoughts are real, when you constantly have negative thoughts you’re eventually going to believe it. Don’t put too much thought to it because if you do it’s going to make it worse, accept that it’s ocd and bring yourself back to the present moment. I have that feeling too where it feels like my ocd is true and I don’t really want to be with my bf but I’m choosing to trust it’s ok and trying to be in the moment, accept no one is perfect, that love is hard and that he’s a good person and ocd is playing tricks on me, don’t let OCD rob you of your happiness xx

@7710 ❤️ You’re definitely not out of ROCD, it’s only been a few days and you may also get thoughts on the future, you have to accept this could happen, that’s because you cant control your thoughts but also take comfort in know that they’re only thoughts, lots of junk thoughts xx

@Flower33 How real did you think it was for you?

@Flower33 How real did it constantly bother you? I truly I’m in denial. I am annoyed by him constantly due to my anxiety. He has moments of frustration which I can tell are signs of depression.

@Flower33 I don’t wanna break up but what I’m going thru doesn’t seem normal at all..

@Flower33 It… just doesn’t seem like ocd… I am unhappy constantly feeling this way all the time.. 😞 I always ask how real it can get.. like how truly really to the point where someone truly believed that they fell out of love. But was able to get that love back. I obsessed about our issues/arguments/his flaws… To the point I either convinced myself I am not in love or I am just too afraid to admit the truth… 💔 I just want to love him like before. I truly want that but it seems like I am too far gone…

@7710 ❤️ hey i felt like this a few days ago, exactly like you. now i feel so much more like myself and i even get excited at her texts, remind yourself that your ocd is literally TRAINED to target what you love most. repeat this affirmation when the intrusive thoughts get scary and unbearable and indistinguishable. “what i feel to be true right now is just an indicator of what i FEAR to be true.” or if it’s in a panic attack the shorter version “what i’m feeling to be be true is just what i fear to be true”

@niñadelaluna I love my partner goofy personality that’s one of the things I love about him. Lately he’s been getting on my nerves but I know it has something to do with my depression but he’s been depressed for a long time too which makes things more difficult.

@niñadelaluna I know he’s depressed bc he gets very negative. We’ve both been depressed badly…

@niñadelaluna My happy moments I was completely fine. Didn’t obsess about him at thoses moments

@niñadelaluna It’s just I think I got so use to feeling the way I do

@7710 ❤️ harsh reality, you keep telling yourself that, it’s gonna manifest into reality. if u question if it has already, it’s going to. stop programming your mind this way

@7710 ❤️ Hi so sorry for the delayed reply, it’s Been so crazy busy with work. It feels super real for me, even when I argue back and have all the reasons to prove my ocd is wrong it still feels like it’s true, feels so real that it makes me really sad and I’ve cried Over it. But I’m going to trust myself that it is my ocd despite how real it feels, and I know me obsessing about it for hours on end, that turns into weeks and then months reinforces it and makes it feel more real, so I really fucked up there. Also every ocd sufferer have said how real it feels, if it didn’t feel real we wouldn’t have ocd xx

@7710 ❤️ It bothers me every day, all day, as soon as I gain conscious. Working really helps as It takes my mind off things but as soon as I’m not busy the thoughts enter straight away Oh I told my bf yesterday that my ocd makes me angry at him, I told him any little thing he does wrong my ocd latches onto that, even with him holding my glass from the rim where I will put my glass I was so angry at him that I had to go wash my glass, my ocd made me so mad lol but now I’m trying to have more compassion, not only should we have self compassion to ourselves but also to others, we’re human and we’re not perfect, and we should be kind and understanding to their imperfections and any suffering they’re going through, everyone is going through some sort of pain inside xx

@7710 ❤️ Have you looked at the awaken into love website that I sent you? The woman who runs it talks alot about these things, please have a look at her website, Instagram and YouTube videos, it’s really helpful I promise Also talks about love, that it’s not a feeling, it’s an action, it’s a choice. Feelings come and go all the time and what’s exciting is that if you fall out of love, it gives you the opportunity to fall back in love. I have moments where I feel ah don’t feel anything, feels like a stranger (Because of my ocd) but then also have moments of aww I adore this person, everybody goes through, that’s a typical relationship of I love you but now I hate you lol

@Flower33 I’ve looked up awaken into love, ROCD with Danielle Thornton and even had a free call with her and she diagnosed me after everything I told her. I am doing okay now. Kinda. I am scared about being sexual with my partner. We have a good sex life that’s one thing I know but with this it’s been difficult to engage into it. I want to be able to be close with him that way again it’s just difficult. But I have looked into a lot of ROCD videos before.

@Flower33 My partner believes he is on the spectrum mentally. Which I do see signs of. I wanna try to understand what he goes thru so we can be closer. I really wanna save my relationship badly. I never wanted it to die. Even with me feeling off I still am trying. I never felt like this before.. idk maybe it took 12 1/2 years to get out of the honeymoon phase.. I don’t know

@Flower33 It’s just my brain doesn’t stop. I hate every time I see a guy drive my brain says you want a man that can drive… I like driving so I honestly don’t care. I can’t even watch shows anymore… 💔 without thoughts like you want a man like that.. it’s just feeling like I am in denial 24/7 💔