Hey all, I was wondering if any of you had any ROCD hacks revolving around nitpicking your partners flaws. This is something I struggle with and am looking for exercises to help reduce these hellish thoughts. I want to not be as judgeful and relaxed around my partner
Same
@mirbrach It’s so annoying. What do You nitpick about? Trying to see if I have any advice I could share
@Runasone2020 Eth. Not feeling attracted to him or like ath about him. Feeling like I constantly want to leave him. The list goes on and on. It’s complete torture.
@mirbrach It is torture. I hate every second of it. He feels like a complete stranger now, don’t know if you’re feeling the same or not there, which makes me realize it’s purely ROCD which is also comforting but scary.
@Runasone2020 Yes, totally understand, but It feels so real like it’s not even ocd. It feels like I’m in a constant dream like state. Hate it
@mirbrach Right!! So hard. It’s very convincing. It’s hard when you just want to enjoy your time with them:(
I suffer with the same
@surbhi It’s so hard:(
@Runasone2020 I know but we are in this together. Have you started any meds or therapy? I am on meds and therapy and that has helped me quite a lot. I have a combination of rocd and HOCD and therapy has definitely helped me manage them better
@surbhi I am im therapy but not with a specialist. Im on escitalopram but it doesn’t seem to be helping so I am looking to switch. I have HOCD episodes as well but not near as bad as just purely rumimating over my partner. It’s crazy. Earlier I was calm as a cucumber and now I’ve convinced myself he’s an enemy. This is disease is so confusing.
@Runasone2020 Hey I am with you right here. All of us are fighting this together. Please consider seeing a specialist in OCD and that will definitely help a lot. Also remember to be patient because the therapy will take some time before it shows some results. In the end my therapist told me remember what you value more in life your love for your partner or this disease
@surbhi I’m logging into a bunch of free rocd specialists webinars but I don’t have the money for a specialist right now, so I’m trying to save for that. Patience is really something I am struggling with I will admit as ROCD makes me want things to be instantaneous. That is a good way to view things as well.
@Runasone2020 I wish you all the best. Please try using the resources available here on NOCD app as well.
Same especially physical .so distressing
@yaadein Tell me about it!
@Runasone2020 I hypyerfocus on his appearance and many times seeing him ugly:/ Comparing him all the time with others if he looks better I feel relieved if not I panicked and alot of distressing thoughts attack my mind at once .. I feel so alone in this :/
@yaadein you’re not alone. I do the same. I have to make sure I find him 100% all the time and it’s frustrating. or his height bugs me which it never really did before (he’s 5’3 and I’m 5’4) so it just kind of goes around and around. I’ve tried CBT which does help and I’m switching SSRIS as well to hopefully take the edge off
@Runasone2020 It's so exhausting :( what is CBT/SSRIS ?
@yaadein CBT is something used in therapy that’s helps you kind of change your thought process!! It’s very helpful, if you want I could send you a video explaining it to see if it would help you. It’s easy enough to do on your own I think. And SSRIS are anti anxiety meds.
@Runasone2020 yes please I will be so thankful as ERP is so difficult I can't even start with it
I would try something called I-cbt. They say erp is a form of cbt therapy and that regular cbt doesn’t work for ocd. I read that I-cbt is supposed to help with ocd if erp doesn’t work. I really want to try it but there is like only one provider in ct and there are not any openings for her currently 🥲
@mirbrach huh I’ve never heard about l-CBT I’ll have to look at it. my therapist has been teaching me CBT which has helped a little but not much.
Anyone who’s conquered rocd I would love advice. I am in therapy but I have this one sticky thought that will not go away. I’m talking months and months. Sometimes whether it be a moment or on/off I think my partner looks ugly. It feels 100% true. This thought/feeling produces distress and guilt. I constantly am trying to figure out ocd and that’s turned obsessive. I’m constantly trying to understand what’s real and just understand what is happening to me and how to overcome this. I’ve struggled with different themes in the past, but this one is different with how the thoughts present (feeling so real immediately)
So me and my boyfriend are going on our first short trip together and as an avoidant person who tends to be very anxious about being seen in a relationship and being in a relationship in general, it could become a very triggering experience. I have had previous OCD themes but the last few years have been very latched to the topics HOCD and ROCD. I just know that spending so much time together could lead to intrusive thoughts about him and our relationship and result in micromanaging and being irritated. Anyone tips on how to enjoy this and not put too much pressure on myself ?
I am at a very difficult spot in my relationship. My boyfriend and I have been together for 6 years, and I have a history of cheating that for years we’ve been trying to work through. To me, it makes a lot of sense that my OCD has attached itself to this and for the last few years I’ve experienced intrusive sexual thoughts of others and relationship ocd. I have been open to him about the content of my thoughts and now, with a proper diagnosis of an anxiety disorder, I am able to reframe them and work through them with ERP so that my brain will *hopefully* get bored and stop sending them. But, things have not been easy. As a result of this and everything in our past, he has become anxious about all the scenarios where I could be having sexualized thoughts about other people. To him, if I am thinking something utterly different than what I am telling him or acting like to him, he can’t fully trust it. And of course, I can imagine how difficult it is to know your life partner is sexualizing others in her brain and to be able find a way to dismiss them as unthreatening, especially when past mistakes say otherwise. Is there anyone that has gone through this with a partner? And other than repeatedly explaining the egodystonic nature of my thoughts and providing reassurance, what are some things you did that helped them? Any advice helps! Thank you
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