These really trigger my intrusive thoughts and feelings especially on social media. Bc like they make me panic when I feel feelings of "attraction" but I only find masculinity attractive in men and in women as nothing of a romantic or sexual nature. :(
this scares me :( i have a stuck stereotype in my head that lesbians who date, one is masc and the other if fem. so i get scared because i don’t feel girly a lot, that it must mean i’m masculine and that i’m a lesbian. and then when i see girls who are masculine i don’t have any response, but if i see who is really feminine and pretty it freaks me out. and i also get scared that if i don’t find women who are masc attractive, that must mean i don’t like men. omg it’s this whole cycle 🫠
It worries me too a little bit. But I always took that as it must really mean I like men. Ever since I heard about the masculine women thing, I'm fucked up. I hate social media bc it triggers me so much. Friends of mine agree that it means I really like men but those ppl on social media have a different opinion. I only know that I wanted to be with men. Never a woman.
@Meg Johnson yeah i’m scared it means i don’t like men :( but i just keep reminding myself that i do love men and i love being with them. and i can’t see myself dating a girl so it helps a little bit
@phew99914 - Exactly. Before, I couldn't imagine myself with a girl and I always wanted to be with men. I would always care about how they saw me and I was always nervous around them. I never wanted to be with a girl.
@Meg Johnson same! i miss having genuine crushes on guys and i miss how they were all i could think about. i wish i could go back right now, that would bring me so much comfort. i’ve always seen girls as friends or someone i didn’t like lol. never anything more
@phew99914 - Lol. Same for me with the girls. I was always major jealous of them though. I had mostly boy friends, but I had a few friends who were girls. I used to believe my attraction to guys was natural and genuine, and I still do to some extent. But now my mind is like "you were forcing it and didn't realize" and actually finds memories of that shit.
@Meg Johnson ha i feel exactly the same. like it makes me second guess all of the feelings and experiences i have had in the past. i hope that jealousy is a good sign you really like someone, cause i remember i got insanely jealous when someone flirted with my boyfriend. i still do now but not as much
@phew99914 - I remember with my first intense crush, I saw him kiss another girl and it was such a horrid feeling in my chest. And I was upset when I found out he was dating someone else. Also any other guy I liked if he flirted with another girl, I would get so jealous.
@Meg Johnson same. i know we will get through this, even tho it’s super tough :)
If possible at all, try to make light of it. Sexuality is something that’s so nuanced and complicated and there’s nothing wrong with thinking someone’s hot that you never identified with. It doesn’t have to change your whole concept of your sexual orientation. It’s pretty normal :) OCD is based on the fear. If you can temper the fear a little it might help.
This triggers me too bc I have admired women who have masculine qualities. So much that if they were men, I would have had a crush on them. But I've liked men my entire life.
I was trying not to think abt it and honestly inwas doing a great job until a woman came on my fyp on tiktok and said “if u think women are objectively more attractive u re not straight” and now i’m so anxious and distressed and am scared i might be comphet. When i was little i remember being obsessed with the “i cant remember to forget u” mv so i rewatched it and thought it was sensual but nothing more. Idk. She also said that if u use a fantasy to get arroused around men u might not like them. Idk anything anymore Im so tired
hey, so i’ve had these insane thoughts about like, this dude. and i assumed it’s intrusive feelings, but it also has happened w the fact o think i like girls? but i don’t? like, i get the gronal response, and everything, and like, it sometimes feels like i actually like them, but it always makes me sick? same way w the false attraction guy, and it even started happening w my bsf of like 9 years? and it’ll tell me the most insane things like “maybe u are attracted” “maybe if u got w them the thoughts will stop” someone please help.
Just curious, how does the false attraction feel to you? I believe people say they are different. I’m not reassuring, just interested in other peoples experiences. Mine feels like my chest is crushed with anxiety, when I notice a good looking male, it feels like I’ve just missed being hit in the car (that fear sensation). I feel sick after the thoughts. I also feel my face screw up which may be a compulsion which I’m trying to stop.
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