- Date posted
- 6y
- Date posted
- 6y
Respond with uncertainty: maybe I’m gay. Maybe I’m not. Can’t know for sure. Sit with any anxiety that develops until it dissipates. Do this again and again each time the thought arises. Think of the thought on purpose just to think the uncertain response. It’s called ERP therapy and it’s the most effective treatment of OCD. You have to face your fears directly and sit with them without trying to neutralize, suppress, and analyze.
- Date posted
- 6y
@ocdsucksbutt — Its a skill you have to learn through practice. A lot of people’s knee-jerk reaction to unwanted thoughts is to try to push them away. But you can always bring them back. Next time your mind sends you an intrusive thought and you start fighting it, take a second to stop, take a deep breath, and invite the thought back in. Have it again, but this time sit with the anxiety without fighting it off with rituals and compulsions. We all have a natural fight or flight response to danger, but as we habituate to the thoughts, that too will dissipate with time. You’ll start responding with “oh it’s one of these again. Sigghhhhh... ok.” Rather than kicking into high-gear fight mode automatically.
- Date posted
- 6y
Ask, have I ever actually been gay? And say hey, it’s okay I will give it a few weeks and see if this goes away. It’s no biggie if you are or aren’t
- Date posted
- 6y
I’ve tried that and the truthful answer is no I haven’t. Same thing with the thought of being Bi pops up too
- Date posted
- 6y
Me but in reverse lmao
- Date posted
- 6y
pureolife, but how do I not fight the thoughts? I feel like my mind automatically fights the thoughts without me wanting to, it’s just a defense mechanism
- Date posted
- 6y
Thank you. I truly hope I can manage, if not I’m not sure what I’ll do. A part of my anxiety is the fear of the longer I’m having this the worse it’ll get and it’ll be too late to fix.
Related posts
- Date posted
- 20w
I am a 18 year old masc lesbian with a loving girlfriend for 1 year, and I have been lesbian for almost my whole life and I have never been attracted to men in any way. flash to my past, My ex girlfriend who used to identify as a lesbian had cheated on me with a man. Recently I saw this tiktok of this masc lesbian turn straight and my friends and girlfriend made jokes I am going to turn straight for my male best friend. My male best friend came over and he’s a great guy but I do not want him in any way. when him and i were hanging out my mind threw in a thought it was “What if i like him”, i came back home and i had the worst panic attack and i felt so sick, i cried and i cried. ever since that day I have been struggling with intrusive thoughts, i don’t want a man in any way, and i feel comfortable as a lesbian but these thoughts won’t stop and they become worse when i see people say being lesbian is a phase or that i haven’t met the right guy or i’ll change in the future. i just want these thoughts to stop, i don’t want to stop being a lesbian ever, i love women so much and i just want all of this to be over with. i do not want a man in any way and im tired of my thoughts doubting myself and i hate the “what ifs”, I just want to be my old self, I want to be happy with my girlfriend.
- Date posted
- 19w
hi i’m a lesbian! and i have known im a lesbian for a really long time and i have a sweet girlfriend of 1 year. it all started when i saw this masc lesbian come out as straight, after that i had my guy friend over and he’s a sweet guy and he was flirting with me (he didn’t know i was gay) im not sure but i panicked and my brain froze and i was like “do i like him”, ever since my brain has been over worked 24/7 for 2 months now and it’s spiralling constantly. im trying to control it but all these thoughts are so disgusting and my brain tries to put him and i in scenarios that make me uncomfortable and i feel panic and i hate it. i have always been comfortable being a lesbian and i still am comfortable as a lesbian, but i dislike these thoughts i have about him and men and i want it to be over. i do not want to experiment with men even tho my brain is telling me i do, i find it disgusting and i dread it, i have a sweet girlfriend and i want to be with her forever, i do not imagine anything with any men and i hate these thoughts. im scared of becoming bisexual/straight one day and i hate hearing sexuality is fluid. its a whole mix of comphet and so-ocd
- Date posted
- 14w
I’ve recovered from HOCD before and got my attraction and my usual actual identity back. I was recovered from end 2022- start 2025 until I got triggered UGHHH😭 My HOCD is REALLY trying to convince me and it’s SO annoying cause I genuinely don’t want these thoughts. I know I naturally like men and always have done so. I can’t wait for my first therapy session in two days Omg! I need your advice, not necessarily reassurance, but more advice? My HOCD is throwing random “proof” I did/ saw as a child in my face, which back then had no meaning in my life and I continued to live a perfectly heterosexual life. I’ve educated myself about arousal non concordance / child’s play, but it still doesn’t remove the HOCD. I’ve read therapists great explanations on how it’s not a sexuality issue, BUT ITS AN OCD BRAIN ISSUE. So basically I’ve been straight and i will die as straight. But my ocd is still continuing with the intrusive thoughts/flashbacks. I’ve had some moments where I haven’t done as many compulsions and had less anxiety but still had those damn thoughts and I DO NOT want those damn thoughts. I have so much proof and factual/logical explanations but HOCD is still continuing to thrive. I absolutely hate this and I feel so alone. I wish there was a reset button cause I don’t want these thoughts to happen. I want a man and I stand by that. How do y’all deal with these situations? Cause sitting with the thoughts is clearly not helping.
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