HarmOCD

Sometimes it feels like I “have” to do it or I “want” to do it. It’s terrifying.

Same here

@Catlove9 Same !!

@Catlove9 Here are my big “what ifs” or thoughts surrounding harm ocd What if I’m a sociopath and want to do bad things. How do I know I don’t really want to do bad things if I keeping have the thoughts. What if I’m evil. What if I could lose control of my body and harm someone. Anything that can be a weapon makes me feel distressed too when I’m in a flare (knife. Gun. Bat etc). I constantly have a fear that I could lose control of my arms and hands or just “snap”. What if I harm myself and run my car off road. What if I lose control and hit a person crossing the road. It goes on and on and on. Basically anything that can harm someone else or myself. Some of them are so bad I don’t think I can type them out. What’s so ironic is I’m known as a kind compassionate person. I’ve even worked on the care team at church where we just listen and pray for hurting ppl. OCD attacks your values and typically is the opposite of who you are. Because I want to be so opposite of anything evil, I struggle with harm ocd the most. I hope this helps! Hugs to you 💖

@Itsheathersocd This is exactly how mine is. I’m the most empathetic person and I’m constantly questioning myself now

@1996. That is so normal. Classic harm theme ocd. You’ll get through it. I promise.

Hi. Just constantly testing/asking myself if I’m evil or bad. Ruminating over this for hours. Worst is like Catlove said, thinking omg I might have to do what my worst fears are telling me. Avoiding situations or animals or people.

@jay71 Please does anyone else do this?

@jay71 I do! Read my paragraph above. It’s really common 💖

@Itsheathersocd Oh thank you! Having mini meltdown and sorry asking for reassurance xx

@jay71 Trust me I get it. Been there a million times. You aren’t alone and you’ll make it through this. There is a difference between reassurance and support and right now I’m offering you support! Sit with your feelings and welcome them instead of trying to resist. That always helps me. It does get better over time and will. Hang in there

@Itsheathersocd You’re very kind thanks 🙏

@jay71 It feels so convincing. It feels like you have to do it. Like you don’t have a choice. It’s awful.

@Catlove9 I get the same fears!

@jay71 And then I get a moment of clarity. It lasts 30 seconds if that and then I’m back to feeling like I’m on the edge of acting out my thoughts.

@Catlove9 Same here. I reassure myself, then as you said literally get this doubt again which won’t go away

@jay71 It really sucks. I’m struggling really bad right now. I just feel like it’s never going to end. Then I get the intrusive thought “it will only end when you do it.” And then the cycle starts again! I’m really sorry you’re going through this.

@Catlove9 I’ve had same terrifying thoughts honestly

@Catlove9 I do have rational moments a lot, where I realise how ridiculous it is. But then the anxiety just returns.

@jay71 It feels like they will but go away. And I know we are supposed to sit with it, but it is so scary.

@Catlove9 I just feel impatient like I just want to be well again and stop being scared.

@jay71 That’s exactly how I feel. And it feels like bc it’s not happening fast, that I’m going crazy instead.

@Catlove9 We’ll get there ❤️