- Date posted
- 2y
My ROCD just ruined my friendship
The only friend I had left who was supportive and there for me. He always talked to me and listened to my anxieties about my ex. My relationship ended 1.5 ago and I can’t stop the obsessions and anxiety. My friend didn’t understand ROCD or OCD- I never tried to explain because i just didn’t think he would understand. Maybe I should have tried because he was the only one who would still talk to me about it. Until tonight…I was really upset about a particular anxiety about my ex and I told him about it. He kind of snapped and lost patience. He told me I was obsessed with my ex and that I was stuck and that I was going to stay stuck forever while he moves on. He told me basically everything that I was terrified was true and would have panic attacks about. Then he said he was “done trying to help me” and needed space. That was it. I can’t imagine our friendship can ever get back to a healthy place after this. And the thing is, I know without knowing about how OCD can affect you, from the outside looking in, I DO seem obsessed with him. I am obsessed- just not in the ways it looks like 😅 I was so careful not to talk too much to anyone about it and yet still it ruined another friendship And of course, now I’m sick with anxiety that everything he said was true. I lost a friend because of my obsessions with my ex. And that makes me even more anxious that my ex was all wrong for me. I think I’m spiraling. I’m just really upset. I lost my best friend over a stupid fight because of my STUPID ANXIETY. Fuck this.