- Date posted
- 2y
Stolen Joy
I'm feeling so upset today because OCD keeps stealing my joy and my peace. When I'm having a good moment or good day, I feel like there's only a short time before the what ifs start to throw me off. I just want to be happy
I'm feeling so upset today because OCD keeps stealing my joy and my peace. When I'm having a good moment or good day, I feel like there's only a short time before the what ifs start to throw me off. I just want to be happy
My joy has been sapped from me ever since this began for me. You’re not alone. Little by little every day, that joy and your authentic self will stay present in the moment longer and longer. You got this!
Happens to me too. I have moments of normal and happiness but because my OCD is so bad, it questions those moments and those feelings.
I am sorry that you are struggling. Ocd has a tendency to to attack us at vulnerable moments, including when things are going well. I have this happen to me often when leaving for a vacation - or a long weekend for work - or a holiday. What if this or that - maybe something bad will happen - and I have learned with ERP to say maybe or maybe not - but I am going to continue to live in the present moment and enjoy it. It doesn’t magically take away the anxiety but I don’t allow ocd to tell me what I can and cannot do. I hope this helps.
A lot of people with OCD feel this same way, I know I have. Whether you’re currently experiencing anxiety/discomfort/intrusive thoughts or you’re currently feeling well but are worried OCD will come back around the corner, it’s all just another way for OCD to keep it’s claws dug in you. When you’re focusing/analyzing how you feel or don’t feel, you could be engaging in a compulsion. The best practice via ERP is that when those what if thoughts strike, lean into them and respond with a maybe, maybe not. It won’t magically make the feeling of discomfort go away, but with time you’ll stop paying as much attention to those thoughts and they might not bother you as much. I’ve found that when I focus on feeling unwell/spend time checking how I feel, it’s sometimes a self-fulfilling cycle. You are strong, you can handle this, and you’re not alone!
I want to go do something I enjoy so badly but I feel like I don’t deserve it. I’m full of guilt, shame, and anxiety. I wish I felt okay like I did a few days ago. I feel so awful right now. I hate OCD. I HATE pocd. I hate all of it. I wish this was easier. Sometimes I have the thought that I wish I was the things my OCD makes me afraid I am out of desperation to stop the anxiety, but then that thought makes me panic bc I don’t actually mean that or want that I just want the anxiety and urgency in the compulsions to stop. I’m so tired
I suffer from religious ocd. My only goal in life is to live in God's will and to serve Him - to live and enjoy His eternal purposes & His presence. Jesus Christ is my life. That is my only desire on this earth, this short trip into eternity, and it's being stripped by ocd thoughts and intrusive thoughts 24-7. I have read many times that ocd can 'feel real', and this is true, our minds lie to us because of fear and anxiety we can't and were never meant to carry. I have begged and tormented myself in every way to find an answer from God. I think His answer may be that this is OCD, but I'm not sure. I started therapy again because I am so exhausted and this had stolen so much of my life in a spiral of negativity, depression, and constant anxiety & intrusive thoughts. I have spent about 2 years trying to figure out if my thoughts are real or not, especially with ocd it can deceive so easily as a spiritual matter when in reality it is just a thought, which is confusing and scary to say the least. Can anyone share their experiences with this sensation? No matter what the theme is... Thank you & Praying for your comfort
Whenever anyone starts to feel like their thoughts are less triggering or they feel a moment of happiness/ relief OCD tells you that you want the thoughts back or you actually like having the thoughts and maybe thats just the person I really am? I feel like im going insane😢
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