Real events are hard to accept

Do you ever feel like people without OCD have an easy time just saying “you need to accept uncertainty” only because they’re not subject to the same level of fear and anxiety as an OCD sufferer would? I feel like they don’t really accept uncertainty, they’re just naturally more certain about things. For example, if you ask anyone whether they think their loved ones are real or not, they will never answer with “maybe, but I’ll never know for sure”. They’ll just say “of course they are”. Isn’t that what certainty is? For me, as I’ve been suffering from existential OCD most of my adult life, such a question absolutely terrifies me. The mere thought of my loved ones and the world not being real sends me into a spiral of anxiety and depression and never ending certainty-seeking behavior. I just can’t stand the thought of that horrible scenario being true. How can one accept uncertainty about such a thought, when it completely undermines all my values and beliefs and world view? Can non-OCD sufferers really accept those nighmarish scenarios? Am I misunderstanding what ERP and therapy is about?

Hey guys, for the past three months I’ve been obsessing over a mistake I made about 6 months ago, I constantly have panic attacks and wake up in fight or flight mode I have convinced myself that someone is gonna find me somehow and punish me. I have endlessly looked up reassurance that what I did wouldn’t get me in trouble or something, I have filled up 5 different ChatGPT chats and it tells me it’s 100% certain nothing will happen. But then I convince myself well everyone says not to trust it and then I just spiral again. The point is I’m just scared, I’ve convinced myself this isn’t OCD because it’s something I actually did wrong. I can’t stop looking for reassurance because that’s the only thing that makes me feel safe anymore. Everyone tells me, just say maybe, maybe not, but my brain has convinced me the stakes are too high. I’m too scared and I don’t know what to do.

I’ve heard it’s not good to seek reassurance or give it because it lowers your tolerance to uncertainty. But how do I avoid seeking reassurance when my thoughts and doubts are so bad, I genuinely just don’t know anymore if I’m a bad person or if it’s just OCD? I know I’m supposed to sit with the uncertainty, but how can I do that when the uncertainty has me unable to trust my own brain? Especially when the OCD is real event and POCD? How can I not seek reassurance when I feel so alone and so abnormal and just don’t wanna feel that way anymore? In turn, I see so many people on here struggling so bad and my heart breaks for them. How can I give advice to towers without giving them reassurance and hurting them in the long run?