Hi there! Has any of u here struggle this kind of OCD?I always suffer after using bleaches or household cleaners thinking I have left some amount on surfaces after cleaning. How to deal with this?
I have this as well!! I feel like if I’m around grease or touch it, I can’t get clean enough in the shower or washing my hands/self. I am following this thread to see for myself as well. I have hope for us!
Omg why are we like this?.haha. how do you cope with it?.
@jellycakes I have to take a step back and breathe deeply. I’m still struggling so I’m sorry I don’t have the greatest advice lol
I have had this, my sister had a white dress which was washed with a bleach thing to get a stain out and it was hung up after being washed and dried but kind of still smelt like bleach and i walked passed it my arm brushed against it slightly and i was convinced there was somehow bleach all over my hands and had to wash my hands like a million times. It’s all very irritating
Very irritating😵💫
I also thought that. But a while ago I really tried my best not to ruminate whenever I handle bleach. I always have these thoughts that what if at the time that im doing laundry or just disinfecting stuffs, the water with bleach will splash on me or to my other family members. Poisoning then passes in my brain then I get anxious. But you know, i really try hard to accept uncertainty. We dont know everything for sure always. I learned that in order to live life, we must risk.
I have had. ERP helps!!
Hi! What exposures are you doing?
@jellycakes I had a lot of items in my home that I avoided so I began with touching them without washing my hands, step by step. I was afraid of battery acid, cleaning products, chemicals for the car and so on. I learned to gradually use them in a normal way, without extra precautions. I am not happy with all if them, I still have some fears but I have come a long way.
@Estrid So basically if u touch something poisonous such as chemicals, you dont wash your hands? Im always afraid like if I have chemicals in my hands , i can get someone sick or poisoned.
@jellycakes This is best done with the help of a ERP therapist. When we have OCD we exaggerate everything and think that we have poison on our hands but we actually haven't. I have had exactly the same fears. When it comes to poisons its always about the dose and how much. In my head a small drop of dish soap was a BIG risk...
@Estrid Whenever you handle chemicals , such as bleach or household cleaners, do you wash your hands right away? I cant afford to have an erp therapist so I just asked you. Im so sorrry. Hoping that ypu might share what you have learn. :)
@jellycakes It takes 26 seconds for a product to absorb into your skin. I wouldn’t let cleaning chemicals sit on your skin because that affects your overall health becaise they are toxic. But for example, touching a dish sponge or a door knob in your house will be okay, you won’t have to wash your hands immediately bc bacteria enters into the body by mouth, nose and eyes. As long as you don’t shove your hand in any of those places, you should be fine. This is something I am working on. But I do not recommend letting any cleaning chemicals sit on your skin for the purpose of erp therapy. That’s not a good idea
@Anonymous Well, it's a good idea with small drops of chemicals if you have bad OCD. The risk of living in the hell pit of OCD is a bigger risk of wasting your life than if you handle small amounts of cleankng chemicals. We have to fight for freedom. With OCD we have lost the healthy perspective.
@jellycakes If you dont have a therapist I think you should ask a trusted relative or friend to show you how they do and have them like role models. When I clean I don't wash my hands right away, but I use a cloth and wipe things. I dont put my hands into bleach, it would be a silly thing to do. But if one small drop fall on for example my trousers its ok for me to move on. I had a hard time to buy groceries before, because I always looked for spots everywhere, maybe chemicals!? After ERP these spots helped me to accept that chemicals can be everwhere, I have no control. And tiny residues doesn't matter, and even if it shpuld matter on some level, we can't live that way, if we should we have to live in isolation without connection to other people.
@Estrid Is it okay if bleach is mixed with water?like for example your doing laundry then there are times Im afraid i already contaminated some stuffs.
@jellycakes All that "I am afraid" and "what if's" is typical OCD.
Actually, I will tell you both that these kind of obsession is really simple (not easy) to create exposures for. The brain can see what you are doing and "okay, she touched that without washing afterwards, maybe it isn't that dangerous" I did exposures everyday and it was mind blowing how I could do things I was so afraid of earlier on.
@Estrid Do you have any tips on dealing with the anxiety that comes with exposures?
@Abbie<3 It needs practice but it's about anticipate it and accept. It helps me to think of the anxiety as a wave flooding over me, I surrender and let the anxiety be there, I don't try to push back. I also remind myself that I have OCD and that my alarm system is overreacting. I try to "be in my body" and notice what happens, "ok, now I feel nausea", "now I am dry in my mouth". In the beginning I thought I should "sit with the discomfort" just passively sit. Now I know that I can continue with daily living while having the anxiety and thoughts, I show my brain that the anxiety isn't that important.
So I have pretty intense contamination OCD tied to Moral/Real event OCD, and I'm having a hard time with it because part of me does genuinely believe my logic checks out, and I was hoping to get some insight as to how to change the way I see it from other people who sort of get the mindset involved :). To sum it up as well as I can, I basically have a very souped-up version of the same item-event association most people have. For example, let's say you have a HORRIBLE, GOD AWFUL relationship with a person you can't even begin to think of favorably even years after the event. They had gotten you a stuffed animal for your anniversary at some point. You finally "escape" the relationship, and you throw away the stuffed animal. This is seen as a very normal and sound-of-mind action. Here's where things get tricky: For me, throwing out that stuffed animal wouldn't be enough. After all, it touched my table didn't it? And my table touched the floor right? And these things now carry that person's germs. And if I don't get rid of them, then they'll infect my future belongings. This logic isn't entirely flawed either, as even my OCD specialist said he believes in a "weaker version of what I do". How am I supposed to convince myself that what I'm believing is false when the literal psychologist confirmed that what I'm doing is just a more in-depth version of a normal experience? Ex: I have a new outfit, fresh and clean. I'm unbothered and happy, but I knick the side of a table. The table holds awful associations. I get this awful sense of dread. The clothes are now somewhat sullied, and I'll eventually have to give them away. I don't think I'm explaining this as well as I could, but I feel like those notions are there. Anyways, does anyone have any insight as to how to get my mind to genuinely believe that interacting with these things is "safe"?
(long read ahead, sorry lol) I’ve struggled with ocd for as far back as I can remember. I find that it gets worse with stress, and recently I’ve really been struggling with the contamination aspect of my ocd. I’m worried about it becoming unmanageable and negatively affecting my relationship with my partner. I’ve been living with my boyfriend since January (got kicked out of my house a week after I turned 18, it’s for the better though my house is toxic as hell) and I love living with him, but him and his family aren’t as concerned with cleaning as I am used to. My boyfriend and I have been together going on 2 years and there’s been many times throughout our relationship that his struggle with depression severely impacted his ability to keep up with cleaning his room. This is something I completely understand because I’ve struggled with it too so i’ve often helped him clean, and since i’ve moved in he’s done so much better at keeping up with cleaning (especially because he knows about my issues with clutter, mess, germs, etc.) He is really good at being accommodating towards my needs (not overly so, i’m aware that recovering includes accepting being uncomfortable), but it’s so hard for me to differentiate between what is the normal standard for cleanliness and hygiene and what’s excessive and unhealthy. I get so stressed out every single day over the thought of how dirty everything is. He has 3 cats that mainly stay in his room (he has a catio attached to his window/side of the house) and dogs which stay on the opposite side of the house and backyard, so there is fur everywhere constantly (i’m also allergic to cats but it’s not severe). I can’t stop thinking about how they are getting germs from their litter box all over everything. They also used to piss under his bed and in his closet when his room used to be a mess and it’s soaked into the floor so no matter what it stinks. It’s so hard to bring myself to walk around the house without slippers because my feet will get visibly dirty and my socks would get covered in hair. I always think about how my boyfriend sometimes walks on the rugs in the bathroom in shoes and all the germs that spreads. There’s so many more things but this is already getting long and I am shaking just thinking about how unclean everything is. I want to deep clean the entire house myself so I can get it to where It’s not like psychological torture everyday and it’s easier to maintain but I have been so busy I don’t have the time. I am worried about my boyfriend thinking I don’t like living with him or that I think that’s he’s dirty but i don’t. We have had several conversations about this and he’s reassured me that he knows none of my obsessive thoughts are personal but I still feel so bad about it. I would like to get therapy to help work through this but currently that is not an option for me. I know things will get better once I get through the main things in my life that are causing a lot of stress and therefore making my ocd flair up, but I need advice on what to do in the mean time. I keep having moments where all I can do is shake and cry and clean and I feel bad for my poor boyfriend who can only sit next to me and try to comfort me or help me clean. I also don’t want to make him worried that nothing he does is enough for me (i’ve also already talked to him about this and told him about how I can never even be clean enough for myself and that I don’t think he’s dirty). There’s been many times where I want to tell him to do things that I think might be my own unhealthy compulsions (ex. not wearing shoes in the house or in our room, not getting into bed with socks on, making sure to completely dry off before getting out the shower, put makeup and jewelry back where they belong right after using them, etc.) but i can’t tell if they’re reasonable or not and i try to not tell him unless it’s something that severely distresses me. I’m aware that everything is going to have germs no matter what and have been using NER’s to help manage my thought spirals/rumination. I know that I shouldn’t keep doing compulsions because it just offers temporary relief and makes the problem worse because nothing will ever be enough. I just feeling so overwhelmed and hopeless and exhausted and want some feedback.
Hello, i have very severe contamination ocd, and as i am writing this i feel my hands are dirty lol, but anyways i wanted to know if there’s anyone specialised in Contamination ocd? No matter what type because i really need help and i looked up things but it doesn’t help please!!
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