Hocd or denial
I was diagnosed with ocd like 2 months ago. I have excessive rumination about my orientation. As long as I can remember I’ve only been attracted to woman and never with men. I’m having intrusive thoughts like I’m gay and that u have to come out to everyone because your gay. I’m just worry I’m in denial.
I’m diagnosed with OCD and I’m experiencing everything you said too! These are all very common symptoms. The fact that it bothers you a lot is an indication of it being OCD.
Thank you for sharing what you are going through. It is so helpful for us all to hear each other‘s experiences. OCD is the doubting disease and comes up in various areas of our lives. Try to remember Feelings, emotions, and thoughts are not facts; when they come up, try not to engage in compulsions such as analyzing them, figuring things out, pushing the thoughts out of your mind, etc. Accepting them while not engaging is often more effective. I know easier said than done, but with time and practice it does get better. Be kind and patient with yourself. I wish you all the best on your recovery journey.
Are you saying ocd can hijack emotions?
@Mr.ocd Oh yes
@Liamj514 Oh has that happened to you
@Mr.ocd Yes
@Mr.ocd This happens to me a lot too. I think people forget that just like we can get intrusive thoughts or images, we can also experience intrusive feelings too. I don’t want you to use this as reassurance that the feeling you’re feeling is/isn’t real; I say it so you know that you can embrace uncertainty around emotions/feelings too!
@Mr.ocd In my personal experience with OCD, when I’m in an OCD episode, it can affect everything.
Rumination, mental checking, reviewing body sensations, and trying to figure out if you’re attracted to men are all compulsions that keep you stuck in the OCD cycle. Have you heard of Exposure Response Prevention therapy? It is the gold standard treatment for OCD. I know it can feel like a lot, overwhelming, and scary to seek treatment. But doing therapy here at NOCD helped me learn to let go + take back my control. I definitely recommend giving NOCD a call for their free consultation!
I had Tocd and now it has turned into HOCD. But this HOCD is…complicated? I’m Asexual Panromantic, so i love everyone. However, OCD has been telling me i’m actually a lesbian and that my attraction to men/anyone who identifies as a man is false and i’d be happier with a woman. The thing is, I always leaned on men. Like i prefered men. But i didn’t mind women. But i was more of a men type of pansexual. I was always certain on my sexuality, but now it keeps telling me i’m a lesbian and that i should stop loving men but i know i’m not a lesbian…? Idk this just feels like denial but i know it’s OCD up to it’s tricks. It’s just annoying.
For as long as i can remember i have always been boy crazy. I have always had crushes on men, had sexual interactions with them, etc. I’ve never thought about a woman in that way. I remember around 2021 I had a “what if I were gay?” thought but after around a week it went away. Now the thought is back but 100x worse. Mid December 2023 i suddenly got the thoughts again. I can’t really pinpoint what triggered it, but it may have been the TV show I was watching. In the show a woman around her 30’s dated men and even married one but then all the sudden ended up marrying a woman later on. I starting to think “what if that happens to me?” I couldn’t fall asleep for days and would cry throughout the day. I eventually told my mom about this as I kept having anxiety attacks and she said well if you don’t only like men then that’s ok. But the thing is that I want to like men. I’ve always imagined my life with a husband and kids. I don’t understand how something like this could happen basically overnight. I used started therapy for my anxiety but how do I bring this topic up? Does anyone who has soocd/hocd think this sounds like ocd or could I really just be in denial. My days now consist of these persistent thoughts. I’m always on here or reddit/quora looking up my symptoms to see if anyone else feels the same. i don’t wanna feel like this anymore. i wanna go back to november when i didn’t have these thoughts. I’m still having the thoughts about a month later but the anxiety isn’t as bad which is making me feel worse. i feel like i should be more anxious considering i want to be straight. this isn’t me.
Hey guys, I think/hope that this is just ocd and not me but I can’t differentiate. I m dealing with uncertainty „am I a lesbian ?“ since 3 years and it comes with so many anxiety. I have to say that I like lesb cOrN and exactly this stresses me out !!! I ve been dating men for my whole life and one day the thought comes up that I could be lesbian. It comes and goes month to month. When I m in this „episode“ where I m questioning my sexuality i m googling the whole day if this thought could be true. Also I m checking my feelings by visualising myself with a women and it causes so much anxiety. I just don’t know what to do I try to meditate or to calm down but I can’t go on without having this answer :/ Also I m so anxious to „heal“ myself because then the truth will came out ( my brain says it to me). When I m with men I get aroused and everything works but then my brain says to me that it is just because of the fact of having sex yk? Like it tries to convince me that I m a lesbian… Last month I believed in this and outed myself as Bi in front of my friends although I m not really sure that I m into women. I ve never dated a women or felt any kind of attraction that I felt to men, but what if I m just trying to suppress the attraction to them ? Is anyone dealing with the same shit ? Tik tok triggers me everytime that’s why I deleted this app because everyday I get these videos about people coming out as gay after their relationship.
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