It keeps telling me i want facial hair, and that i want to do all these things to myself that i don’t wanna do. I just want to be a girl. It makes me feel like i want it, but i know i don’t. Even me saying that feels like denial, it also doesn’t help that i have no reaction to the thoughts, yet i ruminate on them. This all happened during a time of stress, like high stress.
Hi bryn2004 - I'm sorry to hear what you're going through. Just know that 1) there is hope and 2) there is help! You're not alone with this, and I'm sure many of the specialists at NOCD would love to work with you. In short, they will help you practice techniques to remind yourself that OCD is simply a combination of thoughts and feelings produced by the brain outside your control. Given thoughts and feeling have no inherent truth or falsehood to them (they're simply words/images and our emotional reactions), OCD has no inherent truth or falsehood to it. The goal is to live according to your VALUES regardless of what OCD "says" or how it makes you feel. Similar to the Wizard of Oz - OCD can seem so intimidating and real - that is until we pull back the curtain and see it for what it truly is - our brain acting in ways that we cannot control (and that doesn't mean it needs to impact how we live our life). Lastly, medication may be helpful as well - I would consult with a doctor / therapist / psychiatrist about this. Good luck on your journey, and godspeed! There is hope!
@thereishope:) I do have meds, i’m upping them this tuesday to 20 mg of Prozac :)
hey. cis girl here. i’m a sort of “butch” lesbian going through the exact same thing, it’s very challenging especially when taking that part of my womanhood into account. i feel this so much. i just want you to know you’re not alone. i don’t have much advice to give other than the practice of emotional naming/writing down your compulsions and then “leaving them to sit” either in a google doc or a physical journal has really helped me the past few days. it gets better. even saying that feels like a lie to me but it DOES get better, i have gotten better before and was free of this theme for a solid year before i relapsed a bit. but it’s so much easier now and getting diagnosed (either from a local psychiatrist which is what i did within 2-3 long sessions or from one of the therapists on here maybe?) can help a lot. there’s a guy on youtube i’ve been listening to despite my obsessions (because i get paranoid and triggered by everything so much so that i can’t even listen to men talk sometimes). i forgot his name but if you search up “transgender ocd” he’ll pop up (bright thumbnail, really cheerful guy, it says he’s a licensed professional in the description — i think the video is called “ocd fear of becoming transgender”??)
@peachbud Oh yes Nathan, yeah. I’m doing better now but i still keep having some thoughts but i brush them off.
I have something similar just I’m transmasc. It’s so difficult when you can’t tell what is what and how you really feel. I try to take it day by day and think of the thoughts as something I’m dealing with and not something I am.
I've been struggling with my gender identity since about 2018 and have reached the point where I am currently on hormones. For a little bit I thought I was a woman but as time has gone on I've settled more into nonbinary as an identity. Now that I am on hormones, I'm noticing that some changes are positive in my mind and some give me a pretty decent amount of distress and doubt. I then discovered that TOCD is a thing and it's kind of thrown me for a loop since I already know I have OCD. I already had doubts but now I'm like, "Could I just be lying to myself and I actually have TOCD?", "Is this just a transphobic diagnosis that keeps people from living as they want?", "Is it possible for me to have TOCD and still be trans/nonbinary?". I'm going to have to talk to my therapist about it but in the meantime I would love some help understanding this whole issue. Thank you.
Hi guys :) I am 21 now, but at 14 I read an article about a woman discovering she wanted to become a man and not realizing it until later in life, which prompted the worst OCD I have ever had. I was paralyzed with anxiety and depression over the potential of becoming a man. I am a woman, I love being a woman, and I identify with being a woman through and through. I thought experiencing trans OCD was behind me, and recently (I just switched from Prozac to Lexapro; I have been on Prozac since I was 16, so maybe that’s a trigger?) it came back. I desperately want it to go away. I feel helpless. I just want someone to tell me it isn’t real, but I know that’s reassurance
I hate tocd with a burning passion, so I’m a girl right and I love being a girl and I wouldn’t change that cuz like that’s me. But ocd attacks that and I keep getting Intrusive thoughts. Like no bruv I don’t wanna be a boy, stop telling me that ocd😭😭😭 But I know this is just ocd, the only issue is I can’t seem to dismiss the thoughts, I’m always fighting, arguing, swearing that I’m a girl and will never change that (compulsions) and I think that’s what keeps the thought sticky and nonstop but like I can’t stop doing compulsions cuz it feels like I’m like agreeing with the thoughts which I’m not. So any advice would be nice
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