I was having a good couple of days then my harm ocd came back. But it was more of self harm instead this time š it feels real, I donāt want it to be but Iāve been doing erp and the anxiety is down with it and I almost donāt have that panic anxiety about it just kind of a deep bothersome feeling when I have the those thoughts. Is this OCD? Or is it normal whatās the next steps?
Yes it can definitely come back and be different when it does! My ocd switches between harm ocd and self harm ocd a lot. Once I get used to one of them, it switches to the other lol. OCD likes to cling to anything that bothers you, your next steps would be to train your brain to accept the thoughts so that you become less bothered about it. You might have to fake having an āuncaringā attitude when the thoughts come in your head at first, but just keep doing it over and over and it will become habit eventually.
@7Eraser So in other words fake it til we make it? Lol
@Kids4Christ Lol yes! It is a strategy that works wonders! Just donāt push away the thoughts, you got to let them linger for a second in order to get used to them :)
@7Eraser Whatās a good way to practice erp with harm ocd about yourself? What thoughts do you have if you donāt mind sharing?
This has been my main one for the last week or so and itās morphed from being uncomfortable around pills in my medicine cabinet, to now thinking Iām clinically depressed because itās upsetting, and then that must mean I will want to do something about it, or that it has implicit meaning. A) combat it by recognizing theyāre just thoughts and not indicative of character/behavior B) Allow the thought to happen, as distressing as it is, and use the āmay or may notā script of āI may or may not harm myself or someone I loveā and then tell it to go fuck itself. I find myself almost groaning and saying, āUgh whateverrrrrr,ā when it creeps in
Mine is like that, it started as a s*** joke thought and it triggered it since then it had changed from self harm, harm to loved ones, Lukemia fear, hitting pedestrians and even thinking I had hiv and that my fam couldnāt drink off my cup cuz they might get it. This bitch is funny sometimes (ocd)
This was me earlier @ work I was telling ocd how fucking stupid it was & I kept with the script maybe I will & maybe I wonāt and itās been a lot better.
Hey guys so I suffer from Harm OCD and thoughts about violently harming other and today Iāve been having super minimal thoughts . I had such horrible intrusive thoughts that it feels weird. Iām in constant fear that the thought will come back randomly and the urges will come back stronger than ever. And Iāll actually commit to my urges and act out on them. Like I still Feel weird because even though I donāt have anxiety ... the killer thoughts are in the back of my head. I gueninly donāt dee normal Anymore.
I am not sure how to even describe what I am going through. And even typing this, I feel like a liar and feel like this is not even OCD. I have Harm OCD. I have had the thoughts, urges, and images. It has felt so real and so scary. I have been able to use ERP for all of that and was mainly successful. But now something new is happening and it does not feel like it is OCD. I cannot even put into words what it feels like, but I will try. It feels like the thoughts have overtaken me and now Iām this evil person who will act on the thoughts. My anxiety is not super high, which scares me because it feels like I have gone too far into the dark side. It feels like I have had these thoughts too long and they are all I can think about. It feels like Iām no longer myself and my identity has changed. I feel very weird. Like not even myself. It feels like there is this dark cloud following me and I try to use ERP but it does not feel like it is working. Not sure if I am ruminating or not because I have no idea what is even going on. I am living my life still, but it feels like it is just a matter of time until I snap. I am very scared right now because Iām not sure what this means and I cannot figure it out. I wish I could explain it perfectly but I do not even know how to put it into words.
I had the worse harm ocd and suicidal ocd couple years ago. And I remember I would get these horrifying thoughts in public that I would immediately wanna go home. Magically it went away after 4 years but during my healing phase I still randomly had those thoughts and it did not bother me so I was like oh my brain now knows. Iām having a horrifying flare up and now these thoughts bother me?? I feel dark and scary. So what if I do ERP and get used to it and think Iām recovered and have another flare up?? How does that make sense
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