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Sorry you’re going through this. I can relate. From time to time I catch myself going down the OCD rabbit hole. When I do, I give myself some compassion and accept the uncertainty (maybe, maybe not). I choose not to engage with the OCD thoughts (what if I become schizophrenic or go crazy?) and instead move on to the things I value. In my journey I’ve learned that I cannot control what comes to my mind but I can control whether to respond. This also goes to the fear. I can respond to or let it run its course. I usually choose not to respond. By doing so it keeps me from acting on the compulsion to google. Hoping this helps you!!!

This is actually a pretty common fear, even for people who just have anxiety or panic disorder. My mom has GAD and Panic disorder and she said she had this fear for a while, it's a scary place when our emotions are so intense. I've been working on this with my nocd therapist, one thing that helped me a lot was to just say over and over again. I might go crazy, I might go insane. Eventually my brain gets tired of thinking about it and stops. The thoughts are always flowing by but they are definitely not as intense as they use to be.

Thank you❤️❤️

Thank you guys 💙💙💙